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Crap food that tastes yummy.

 
  

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Olulabelle
20:16 / 01.05.04
Half a pack of butterscotch and half a pack of chocolate Angel Delight mixed together and then made up as normal.
 
 
Sax
20:24 / 01.05.04
Mr Kipling's Country Slices.

Aero chocolate mousse (buy one get one free at Co-op Late Shops everywhere!)

Chocolate raisins.

McDonald's chocolate milk shake.

God, it's a wonder I'm the svelte strip of sexiness that I am.
 
 
marwood
21:52 / 01.05.04
Hotdogs. Are lovely when I get them, but always at some point I look down at it and start to think about what I'm eating, so I never manage to finish one.

Greek yoghurt with golden syrup. It can be made even better with some raspberries, but that might be a bit too healthy for this thread.

Bagels with herby cream cheese.

Mashed potato (ok, Smash) with milk and butter and cheese in it.

Caramel donuts from Waterfields the bakers with custard on the inside, caramel sauce on the outside and a big white chocolate button on top..

Damn this is making me hungry ~drool~
 
 
Whisky Priestess
22:01 / 01.05.04
Marshmallows.

Bubblegum.
 
 
Olulabelle
23:12 / 01.05.04
Aflaminghalo, I'd like to contest bagels with cream cheese - they contain carbohydrate, starch I believe, and also calcium. They may not be raw fish, but it's still nutritious.

And as you say, greek yoghurt should not be allowed either given it's propensity for...um...'friendly bacteria'. (Oh dear, I feel myself leaning towards the 'Godawful Adverts' thread, sorry.)

Chocolate raisins are also banned entry from this club, since I feel that raisins have some basic health value. However, Aero chocolate mousse, marshmallows and bubblegum are very welcome.
 
 
Bed Head
23:22 / 01.05.04
In what universe does bubblegum count as food?
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
23:27 / 01.05.04
Pickled mussels. Basically bivalves in brine, with everything good about them leached out, but they feel so good...
 
 
Olulabelle
23:27 / 01.05.04
Mine and Whisky Priestesses, obviously.

Just because your Grandma told you bubblegum was the sweepings off the factory floor doesn't mean you should believe her. Grandmas all lie about new-fangled things, it's their job.

It also doesn't stay in your bowel for years, contrary to that urban myth.

Although, actually, I don't know that at all. It very well may do.

Calling all science-orientated people...
 
 
Bed Head
23:42 / 01.05.04
I thought bubblegum is only really chewing gum that you can make bubbles with. An extra ‘E’ number for elasticity. It’s a variety of chewing gum, rather than a totally separate species. And I’m pretty sure you’re not meant to swallow chewing gum.

Then again, of course, I’m a disgusting boy. In my universe, chewing gum is for seeing how far you can spit it across the road, not swallowing. And bubblegum would get the same kind of treatment. Hypothetically.
 
 
Olulabelle
23:54 / 01.05.04
Spitting is quite disgusting in my book and apart from anything else, it's a waste.

Far better to swallow. No?
 
 
Whisky Priestess
23:58 / 01.05.04
Surely, if you can't even digest it, bubblegum is the ultimate "no nutritional value whatsoever" food? Sort of metafood, really.
 
 
Bed Head
00:12 / 02.05.04
Nutritional value, or lack of it, is definitely a consideration in the whole ‘should I spit or should I swallow?’ debate. But I still maintain that a well-chewed gobbit of chewing gum (or bubblegum, if you must) has such potential as a projectile that it would be a waste to swallow it. Not if you can hit the grammar school kids across the road.

And as such, it doesn't count as food.
 
 
Olulabelle
00:30 / 02.05.04
Surely, if you can't even digest it...

I want to know the answer to this. Where is Grant when you need him?

Nutritional value, or lack of it, is definitely a consideration in the whole ‘should I spit or should I swallow?’ debate. Oh dear. I so don't know how I've got here from a conversation which originated about Angel Delight, but swallowing is infinitely more nutritional, owing to the protein content.

But I still maintain that a well-chewed gobbit of chewing gum (or bubblegum, if you must) has such potential as a projectile that it would be a waste to swallow it. Not if you can hit the grammar school kids across the road. Indeed. But possibly the grammar school kids have swallowed enough protein to enable them to deflect the chewing/bubble gum with consumate ease.
 
 
Jacrafter
00:30 / 02.05.04
How about batter dipped, deep fried mushrooms? They're untainted by nutritional value.
 
 
Olulabelle
00:39 / 02.05.04
And are just seven shades of wrong.
 
 
Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo
02:20 / 02.05.04
Kitchen Cooked Potato Chips. These are heaven in a bag.
 
 
Benny the Ball
06:39 / 02.05.04
x1 can of cherry coke, x1 pack of Scampi Fries crisps, x1 flake. Put flake on ice, make sure cherrry coke is cold, put a scampit frie in mouth and suck off all that fishy flavour, take swig of coke, mix together, have flake for pudding - mmmmmmm!

When I was a kid I used to love the aspic that you get Jellied eels in (my dad would always finish the eels and leave me the aspic) with a load of vinegar and pepper - my god, they were bones boiled down!

I read some where recently that there is something like 1300 calories in a McDonalds milkshake - so two a day and that's all you need.
 
 
gotham island fae
07:27 / 02.05.04
How about batter dipped, deep fried mushrooms? They're untainted by nutritional value.

olulabelle: And are just seven shades of wrong.

Well, there is that wonderful fungus in the middle. And they just fucking rock. I'm sorry if you disagree, but in my world, you're wrong, olulabelle.

[Although, only on this particular issue, really.]
 
 
■
07:35 / 02.05.04
Beef Monster Munch.
Pizza Combos.
That is all.
 
 
Jack Vincennes
09:02 / 02.05.04
Battenburg Cake. I've heard that it is possible to make this oneself, but the stuff I'm talking about can only be manufactured in vast factories, the pink cake tasting subtly different from the yellow cake without either having anything readily identifiable as flavour.

As to the bubblegum debate, I had always heard that it was basically a modified plastic and as such would "wrap itself around your innards and kill you" if swallowed. However, I have recently come to suspect that this is another amusing fiction which my parents told me just to see if I would believe it.
 
 
Jester
10:18 / 02.05.04
the bubblegum/chewinggum debate: it does in fact wrap around your innards, in definance of the fact it sounds as plausible as the idea that licourice is made of rats tails.

i did actually once know someone who was severly fucked up as a result of years of swallowing not spitting...
 
 
Grey Area
10:22 / 02.05.04
OK...so, hypothetically speaking of course, if I had a friend who has been swallowing chewing gum for years, and he had just read somewhere that it indeed causes problems, what would I recommend to this, totally hypothetical, friend?

If chewing gum's a plastic is there some kind of solvent that'll dissolve the enormous lump of gum that's nestling in my, hypothetical, friend's guts?
 
 
Whisky Priestess
10:26 / 02.05.04
ooh!

Quavers - nothing but reconstituted potato dust, nothing but yummy

Chocolate milk - need I say more?

And taken together the two make a fantastic hangover cure.
 
 
Abigail Blue
11:48 / 02.05.04
Okay, so I'm not grant, but here's what I came up with.

Apparently, just because chewing/bubble gum is labeled 'indigestible' doesn't mean that it isn't eliminated as waste. I still have my doubts, though.
 
 
Scrubb is on a downward spiral
12:06 / 02.05.04
On this sunny afternoon I give you: Heinz' Macaroni Cheese - cheesy Prozac in a tin. Even better when heated until the plastic* sauce just begins to burn. Truly, an El Primo hangover cure and worry-lifter.

*But not plastic in a bubble-gum sense, as far as I'm aware. Unlike the cheese sauce served with cinema nachos which apparantly has the same molecular structure as plastic, and which is scrummy.
 
 
Saint Keggers
13:55 / 02.05.04
Behold the poutine!
 
 
karellen
16:16 / 02.05.04
No one has mentioned Pringles yet!

It is amazing what MSG can do. I mean why else would anyone in their right mind eat a whole tube of what basically consists of -

sawdust
glue
salt
saturated fat...

...and lashings and lashings of monosodium glutamate
 
 
ephemerat
10:13 / 03.05.04
Chewing/Bubble gum debate:

A bit of Googling turned up loads of articles, some examples here, here and here. According to Wrigley's: 'Chewing gum consists of five basic ingredients, four of which dissolve in your mouth--flavor, sweeteners, corn syrup and softeners. The fifth ingredient, gum base, doesn't dissolve but eventually passes through your system undigested, much like fiber.' Excessive gum-chewing can cause digestion problems (you're over-stimulating a system with nowt in it), but the main problems mentioned in relation to swallowing it appear to be related to certain artifical sweeteners (e.g. hexitol, sorbitol, mannitol) which in sufficient quantities cause bowel purge (i.e. diarrhea) and abdominal pain in some individuals. Many sites view warnings of blockage as an old wive's tale, however, there are several examples of the creation of bezoars (intestinal blockages) in small children who repeatedly swallowed chewing gum. These subsequently required surgery to remove. Adults have a much wider range of substances that they are capable of digesting and their intestinal tracts are larger, but, hypothetically, the same result is entirely possible in an adult.

So, unfortunately, it appears that your mother really was right and you ought to spit and not swallow.

At least in this case.
 
 
Jack Vincennes
12:56 / 03.05.04
You see, my lack of belief in the 'bubblegum will kill you' theory harks back to a vivid childhood memory... picture, if you will, the young Vincennes, having just swallowed gum by mistake, sitting down in the school playground and waiting patiently for the Maker to claim His due from my young form (which would, in half an hour's time, be convulsing in agony). When this failed to happen I thought that maybe it was all a lie and I could henceforth avoid the sticky mess which had previously been the conclusion of all gum chewing activity.

And Whisky, chocolate milk rocks. It's going to be a supreme effort of will for me not to buy Nesquik this afternoon now you've mentioned it...
 
 
■
20:42 / 03.05.04
OOh, Shin Cup noodles. So hot, so fatty and so gooooooooood.
 
 
pony
02:54 / 05.05.04
i don't know if this is disqualified because of the 'pasta' content, but i went through a period last winter in which i would regularly wrap 3 or 4 peanutbutter m+m's in a wonton wrapper and deepfry it. they were delicious, and i won over several horrified roommates with them.
 
 
Squirmelia
14:09 / 05.05.04
Spoonfuls of dulce de leche (known as banoffee toffee in Waitrose, despite not containing anything banana-like) straight from the jar.
 
 
MissLenore
17:43 / 05.05.04
Kraft Dinner. Mmmmmm....especially with extra powdered cheese. I'm probably infertile from my excess consumption of that stuff, but it's just SO yummy.
 
 
Cloned Christ on a HoverDonkey
21:43 / 05.05.04
May I introduce The Seedy Sanchez Pot Noodle!

It's a genuine, honest-to-goodness, no nutrition intended 'Mexican Fajita Flavour' instant noodle snack-in-a-pot. No redeeming features whatsoever, except that one just isn't enough.

Mmmmmmmmmm...... Food substitute.....
 
 
Pants Payroll
01:39 / 06.05.04
MissLenore: Kraft Dinner. Mmmmmm....

AH! Canadian shibboleth! So yummy, and probably almost as nutritional as the box it comes in. KD, we stand on guard for thee!
 
  

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