Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Underground > Conversation >

Barbe-weddings....

Page: (1)2

Goodness Gracious Meme

22:56 / 10.03.04

Okay, this arising out of a conversation with Kit-Kat at Stoatie and Mono's wonderful wedding a few weeks back.

That day rocked, was utterly wonderful, and it was decided that there need to be more weddings. So if none are in the offing, we need to do something about that.

So, gridley has pushed things along with Haus, if Xoc will stop coming between them, I'm sure things'll be fine.

but in the meantime, do you want to marry anyone here? Ask 'em here.

Me, I'm asking Jefe de jeflaces. Coz I'd love to travel and be a eastern trophy wife, but mainly, at Kat's suggestion, for the fact that the wedding would Rock.

The dress-code alone would run to several volumes, and can you imagine the reception?

So go ahead. make someone's day. with reasons please. Marriage. you know it makes sense

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

23:02 / 10.03.04

Oh my God. I have created a monster.

Goodness Gracious Meme

23:10 / 10.03.04

how dare you! or are you talking about my putative fiance?

in which case as long as he doesn't find out, you're alright.

Anyway, back on topic. if you think your lovely lady wife (god i love saying that) wouldn't mind, ask someone. Barbe-weddings aren't like other weddings.

23:11 / 10.03.04

Is it strictly male-female weddings, or can they be carried out abroad for these purposes?

Goodness Gracious Meme

23:13 / 10.03.04

of course it's not strictly male-female. it's a barbie wedding.

okay. some rules. the wedding can involve male/female/trans/andro/other partners in any number.

What we want are descriptions of weddings/and reasons, based on you and who you want to marry.

Of course. it helps if they say yes. then you can conflab..

Brigade du jour

23:46 / 10.03.04

Sorry BiP, I'm a committed singleton. I'm asking NO-ONE to marry me. Not even for money. Okay, maybe for money. Any Barbelith people minted? Cos I could do with a new house and ... stuff.

23:51 / 10.03.04

In any number? I thought this was going to be more like barbecrush, but you can only choose one!

I propose to Olulabelle and Anna dL.
Outfits must be made entirely from silly things from Ebay, and/or sweetie wrappers. Top hats essential. There will be no wedding cake, but a huge apple pie- or many apple pies, I havent decided yet. Wedding gifts may not be material things, but services/experiences, eg trapeze lessons or cirque du soleil tickets.

00:31 / 11.03.04

I want to marry Tom Coates, if he will have me.

I would like Xoc to officiate, with Saveloy and Persphone as co-planners.

I would like praying mantis and Massykr(Qalyn) to act as seconds. That is, both standing beside me during the ceremony and assisting with the consummation.

The ceremony will take place on hot air balloons connected to each other with long tethers, floating over the Black Forest. I'd also like us to parachute off at the close of the ceremony. Audience can toss rice, birdseed or shelled hazelnuts before descending in the usual fashion. No motorized aircraft, please.

00:34 / 11.03.04

I'm asking NO-ONE to marry me.

Well, that's okay - you can dress up fancy, have someone declare you eternally bound to no-one, and we can all get lashed and throw confetti at you. What's more, you won't have to worry about inviting someone else's annoying family.

Goodness Gracious Meme

00:43 / 11.03.04

sounds like the perfect wedding.

The catering at the BiP/Laces wedding will of course be supervised by me, there will pies of all nations, as well as the finest Bengali, Goan, Keralan, Japanese, Thai, Sudanese, Egyptian, Italian, Ethopian, Greek, Nepali... in fact, throw a dart at a map of the world and there'll be veg and (i guess) non veg choices.

Prepared by the finest chefs each nation has to offer, served by beautiful many-gendered opera singers.

I will be wearing traditional morning dress, made to measure by Oswald Boateng. Full accessories: hat, gloves, cane, hip flask. And handmade black, pink and red sequinned trainers.

I suspect my putative wife will be making most of the musical arrangments, but Patti Smith and Bronksi Beat sing as we enter the marquee. and Pulp will perform at the reception.

00:47 / 11.03.04

I long to ask Jack Fear for his hand in marriage, but I hear he’s taken. And even if he weren’t, he obviously only has eyes for E Randy Dupre. Dark, burning, intense, Heathcliff-like eyes, phoarrr. And there’s no way I can ever compete with Dupre’s charms. We need to start another thread for those spinster-types who’re in love with the *wrong* person and are destined to pine away to nothing.

I’ll carry on throwing confetti in this thread, though. Just don’t let me get too drunk.

00:50 / 11.03.04

-Gets down on one knee, rendering myself quite short indeed-

Xoc, you're spoken for, I'm spoken for, we live on different continents and we hardly ever see each other, but when I do see you, it's just like sunshine. Would you be my hypothetical barbe-bride? Or should I join TLBedhead in pining away?

01:02 / 11.03.04

ooh, I want bengali and anna to arrange my wedding - I have no bride or groom, but that's ok, I'm sure you can handle that part, too!

Goodness Gracious Meme

01:10 / 11.03.04

honoured, my dear.

we can work on the partners later, kittie. first things first. we need to go shopping. what are we thining of for bridalwear.

The Return Of Rothkoid

01:11 / 11.03.04

Aw, Maz. And I thought I was a shoo-in for yer hand. Damn.

Guess I won't need this tux.

No. Wait. I'm always in a tux...

Goodness Gracious Meme

01:14 / 11.03.04

Oh, and i would also like to marry Grant.

In a hot air ballon floating over the Andes. The guests will follow at a distance in a Zeppelin playing kazooos, and we will wear identical orange suits.

Will you have me?

01:45 / 11.03.04

Aw, Maz. And I thought I was a shoo-in for yer hand. Damn.

Rothky, I see you even less than Xoc! I was beginning to think I'd imagined you, that I'd imagined Austrailia and fezzes altogether!
-wrings hands in melodrama-

Coming soon: the Barbeconvent.

The Return Of Rothkoid

01:46 / 11.03.04

What, you got something against marrying people in fictional lands?

Wow. Harsh.

02:03 / 11.03.04

-wilts in guilt and shame, picks up my wimple.-

06:42 / 11.03.04

I'll be the one leading the chant of "2-4-6-8! Queers should not assimilate!"

07:14 / 11.03.04

Does no fucker wanna marry me, then?

Ex

11:27 / 11.03.04

I'll be the one leading the chant of "2-4-6-8! Queers should not assimilate!"

...which leads (as naturally as night precedes mare) to the concept of a mass board-wide wedding, Barbe-borg style. Decayed fetish industrial for everyone as we fill the ground at Lords with our seried ranks, face the front and project our meshed minds into the officiating Alice Krige.
Finger-nibbles and dim sum.

13:17 / 11.03.04

Grant, if I am the second at your wedding, does that mean I get to cut your head off should you be gutshot?

13:27 / 11.03.04

Does no fucker wanna marry me, then?

hmmm, a lifetime of irate Sax. Ah, what the hell. Will you walk the plank of online matrimony with me? We'll dress the minister up in a shark suit, and the guests can throw chum at us.

I figure it's better than no Sax at all.

13:30 / 11.03.04

*sighs* Always a bridesmaid. Never a Barbe-bride.

13:31 / 11.03.04

"Throw chum", ha ha ha!

13:34 / 11.03.04

Massykr: Yes, exactly. You and pm should be conferring as to choices of weapons, since I'll be counting on you two to toss me something appropriate when and if the situation arises. Something in a large massage wand, battery operated, would be prudent, stout leather straps should go without saying, and I'd really enjoy having a kris knife at my disposal.

bengali: Oh, and i would also like to marry Grant.

In a hot air ballon floating over the Andes. The guests will follow at a distance in a Zeppelin playing kazooos, and we will wear identical orange suits.

Will you have me?

It might be practical if we were *all* on the Zeppelin to begin with. I wouldn't want the congregants to be too removed from the action, and sometimes those dirigible engines can drown out sounds at a distance. Perhaps we could use the hot air balloon as our limousine/honeymoon suite? I can't wait to see the designs Pers and Loy could come up with! If, uh, they take the job.

I think also we should ask the 10 newest members if they'd care to be flower girls. Boys. Children. People. Whatever....

13:35 / 11.03.04

Oh, and I nearly forgot -- can the orange suits be jumpsuits? Like James Bond villain henchmen?

Tryphena Absent

13:37 / 11.03.04

Will you all marry me? We will move to Christiania, that's got to be legal there.

No star here laces

13:40 / 11.03.04

Wow I am all of a fluster. Of course I shall, darling, and I will be dressed by Shanghai Tang, in a split-to-the waist mini cheongsam.

13:44 / 11.03.04

I too would be happy and honoured to partake of this omnigamy. But who will give us all away? Tom?

13:50 / 11.03.04

And will this be a marraige between all *looks at clock* 3770 of us, or just active posters? Because then we'd all be married to the Greenland Posse .. and certain other posters...

Still, as they say, you can't choose your family.

13:53 / 11.03.04

But the traditional wedding reception punch-up might allow us all to let off some steam/settle some scores. Never know, this could be quite therapeutic in the end.

13:54 / 11.03.04

hmmm, a lifetime of irate Sax

Wouldn't be irate if you can maintain a permanent solid state, mind.

Tryphena Absent

14:02 / 11.03.04

Hmmm... I'm only marrying people who have 10 posts+ and are legal. If you wish to marry me and haven't got that than I suggest you get posting and ageing.

Page: (1)2