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Objects I don't desire.

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Spatula Clarke

18:20 / 10.03.04

New thread title: Christmas presents for the people you hate.

Goodness Gracious Meme

18:31 / 10.03.04

-pastel-coloured clothing.
-a 'modern soul grooves' compilation cd.
-a 'cosmopolitan' compilation cd.
-a guide to law conversion courses. (this one received recently. growl.)
-steak tartare
-nightgowns which are basically big t-shirts. with bunny/puppy logos.
-a razor.
-skincare products/toiletries. I have to use medicated. Get it through your thick heads.
-costume jewellery.

aaaaah. thank you Sax, I feel nearly human again.

w1rebaby

19:01 / 10.03.04

Does this mean that Jack Fear wouldn't mind having a collection of low-quality pornography? Is this some sort of porn shame, "if I'm going to be filthy dirty I deserve to look at spotty arses and bored expressions"?

I don't want a dishwasher. I have one, but I don't want it, I've never used it and never will. I use it to dry things in that I wash in the sink.

Tryphena Absent

19:18 / 10.03.04

Porcelain figurines
Mock georgian furniture
Plastic flowers
Open toed shoes
Pens with pink ink

Mourne Kransky

19:42 / 10.03.04

No thanks for (all these things I have been given or offered):

dead men's shoes (actual, not metaphorical)
figs or dates (equally evil fruity sisterhood)
Viagra or Cyalis
salt cod
carnations
toblerones
a motor vehicle
fishing cat model
Thai boy prostitutes
set of golf clubs
shares in a privatised utilities company (fool, fool!)
a holiday in Spain in return for sexual favours
another credit card
a threesome

oh, such an ingrate

Mourne Kransky

19:44 / 10.03.04

Upon reflection, it would depend who offered me the holiday in Spain.

Goodness Gracious Meme

20:59 / 10.03.04

more offered/given:

-smack
-just a little bit of fish
-briefcase
-sari with 'vast lions mauling people' scene adorning it
-leather chair

(actually for me, this *is* quite testing, as they have to be things I couldn't sell.

)

---

21:05 / 10.03.04

- Manimal gripping my neck.

The Return Of Rothkoid

01:16 / 11.03.04

Lurex.

Spatula Clarke

01:52 / 11.03.04

Three pound coins, so would Biz please stop trying to force me to pick them up?

Sax

07:17 / 11.03.04

A subscription to a 75-issue partwork with tiny bricks and lintels and stuff in a plastic bag on the cover which slowly and miraculously builds into a giant castle. Where you'd put it, fuck knows.

Saveloy

10:18 / 11.03.04

- A mobile phone made from human excrement, with a worm for an aerial
- A gold framed portrait of Hitler, autographed, with "For Saveloy - I couldn't have done it without you!" Especially if the portrait is possessed by Hitler's ghost and he makes loud, off-colour comments whenever the fancy takes him
- The big print edition of Mein Kampf (so huge I can't hide it anywhere), with comments written in the margins in what appears to be my handwriting, saying things like "That's the spirit!" and "More power to your elbow!" etc
- The Guardian/Observer/Independant Fashion Special
- A radioactive dog, which sicks up fire whenever you get within 3 feet of it
- A shower which uses gob (drawn from the crowd at Fratton Park) instead of water
- Stained glass contact lenses, such as a bishop would use. (Look nice, but the lead is highly poisonous)
- The Times/Daily Mail Rich List

Sax, if you do get that partwork, can I have it?

Ariadne

10:49 / 11.03.04

An invitation into Saveloys head.

The Apple-Picker

12:36 / 11.03.04

Tiny birds or rabbits--any animal really--or baskets or flowers or chests of booty made of crystal.

Porcelain figurines.

Jesus action figures.

A pony.

Peeps. Please, not the Peeps.

---

13:46 / 11.03.04

Three pound coins, so would Biz please stop trying to force me to pick them up?

They're stuck to the screen dammit! Don't get sucked into that one, it'll only end in sadness, i know because i've been there.

Regrettable Juvenilia

11:53 / 15.03.04

I like the artist, the song, and the video. Nevertheless, I feel no pressing need to own a small, badly made statue of Britney Spears based on the 'Toxic' video.

Goodness Gracious Meme

13:48 / 15.03.04

Even in the heights of my Tolkien geekery, I have never desired a beautifully-crafted, mass-produced One Ring.

Oddly enough, nor do I want dwarf, elven or gollums rings.

agvvv

14:20 / 15.03.04

"The New Age compilation CD" or anything that can be associated with it(even vaguely)

ibis the being

14:51 / 15.03.04

I want to post a list but I'm completely traumatized by the placenta eating posts.

I do not want -

-any more useless gifts like pretty tin boxes or decorative valentine buckets, no thanks, I'll take a Hallmark card.
-Readers Digest art books.
-Christmas tree ornaments. my apartment is the size of your average walk-in closet, I DON'T HAVE A CHRISTMAS TREE.
-a 40 oz of OE.
-stirrup pants
-a huge can of gourmet decaf
-a parakeet

I'll take your Peeps, A-P. actually I could really use some Peeps and some peeps.

Mazarine

14:53 / 15.03.04

I do not want any quantity of macaroni and cheese loaf (think olive loaf, but with macaroni and cheese in it. It's the most horrid looking thing I've ever seen.)

topical b

20:58 / 15.03.04

the one thing i do not want is

a painful anal itch, accompanied by perpetual rectal seepage.

most anything else is acceptable by contrast.

Goodness Gracious Meme

22:08 / 15.03.04

Yeuch, Maz. That sounds viiiiile.
7

Less searchable M0rd4nt

22:14 / 15.03.04

An umbrella, where the fabric part is made of thin, gauzy, barely perceptible strands of a highly soluable substance. Like soap, only gauzy.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

11:20 / 16.03.04

A bag of mint imperials adulterated with plaster of Paris.
Some shoes made of toffee.
Lint-free lint.
A swiss army knife where all the implements are the pointy thing that might be for getting stones out of horses' hooves, all except one which is the badly scratched plastic magnifying glass for completely failing to light fires.

Kit-Cat Club

14:54 / 16.03.04

Hard-boiled egg with grey round the yolk.

Jack Vincennes

15:09 / 16.03.04

A little set of pan pipes, too small to make a noise that sounds like pan pipes and too pan pipey to keep anywhere other than a rarely-opened drawer. These will nevertheless be extremely hard to get rid of since they were a gift which one of your friends chose at a market and brought home, all the way from Ecuador, because she wanted to get you a little present.

Also, china dolls.

Sax

15:12 / 16.03.04

Hard-boiled egg with grey round the yolk.

Ewww, that is horrible, isn't it?

I wouldn't like to have to attend a three hour management meeting now. Oh, damn. I do.

8===>Q: alyn

16:09 / 16.03.04

A Dungeonmaster's Handbook. Sorry, gamers.

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