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Bottoms

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bitchiekittie

00:48 / 08.11.03

I gotta go with jenn's bum. like someone else said, kylie looks like if you gave her too energetic of a pat she might crack in the middle.

bitchiekittie

00:50 / 08.11.03

...I like a girl who looks like she could give you a good knock to teach you better than to slap bums!

pointless and uncalled for

09:50 / 08.11.03

Trix, Keggers, I'm aware that the good Baz provided the source materiel but I believe that I called Shakira first. Although Baz does have a point with Shakira No Creo ass, far better than Wherever, Whenever. That said W,W did contain the ghetto booty shuffle. You know she does it, you can see it but you don't know how she does it. The Magic Circle will probably label it sleight of ass.

Ganesh

10:44 / 08.11.03

kylie looks like if you gave her too energetic of a pat she might crack in the middle.

Aren't arses supposed to crack in the middle?

I'm Rick Jones, bitch

14:25 / 08.11.03

Lopez. Her arse is natural. Kylie's arse has been bionicaly enhanced. And I'm definately with sir mix-a-lot on the size issue here.

Saint Keggers

15:50 / 08.11.03

Ya know, there are a lot of Raelians in Montreal...hmmmm?

Oh believe me I know. I meet Rael when I went to one of their conferences during my Cults and Sects: New Religious Movements course in college.

Kase Taishuu

00:23 / 15.11.03

Many men have long suspected it, but now it’s official: Kylie Minogue has the ideal bottom. Professor John Manning, of the University of Central Lancaster’s psychology department (don’t academics have better things to do with their time?) has decreed that the the ideal female derriere lies in the ratio between waist and hips. The Aussie songstress meets this criterion in spades. Anyway, here comes the science bit, as they say. The way to assess the perfect bottom is reached by dividing the waist measurement by the hip measurement and that this should ideally be 0.7, meaning the waist should be around a third smaller than the hips. "The bottom is a general sign of a women’s hormonal state and her general health," says the Prof’, "Fat is the key. In women it is stored in the bottom and forms a reserve that allows them to get through pregnancy."

taken from: http://www.peoplenews.com/news/index.php?page=1&id=3314

I rest my case.

The Apple-Picker

01:56 / 15.11.03

Dearly as I love Ms. Minogue, I have to agree that she has no ass. I am perplexed by the popularity of a thing which is hardly the thing.

So if we're sticking with Kylie v. Lopez, I gotta vote for Lopez. Unlikeable as she may be.

But yeah, I'd go for Shakira even before Lopez. Shakira will bite your fingers off and shake that thing of hers!

Mourne Kransky

10:07 / 15.11.03

I declare Kylie victorious with 10 ass votes to La Lopez' 8. Shakira did bloody well for a late entrant with 7 pats on the shapely arse and Ricky Tomlinson, with one vote, can stay on the couch.

I expect to be writing this piece of research up soon and publishing in The British Jounral of Posteriology soon. I will need to do a bit of further work on Afwotam's post though, to determine exactly which buttocks he wished to fondle. All of those proposed, I expect.

Char Aina

15:09 / 15.11.03

i like shalkira's ass, does that mean lalalalopez gets relegated to second equal, or is it over?

done?
dead?

i reckon sharing the spot would give her such a hissyfit it would almost be worth opening the polls again.

Saint Keggers

15:20 / 15.11.03

If only we cold combine them all to form a super ass.

pointless and uncalled for

16:15 / 15.11.03

Do you have any idea what you're saying? Such an ass could not be sustained in the earth's gravitational field.

Matthew Fluxington

16:27 / 15.11.03

I vote Kylie. In theory, I would prefer the Lopez paradigm, but I find Lopez herself very unappealing in terms of personality and appearance and so I cannot bring myself to endorse her in any way. Kylie is super cute, and thus so is her bottom, even if it isn't much. I like Kylie's ass because of her personality.

Mourne Kransky

18:43 / 15.11.03

And that's a perfectly cromulent argument, Flux. I would also argue that Kylie's ass has cheeksful of personality in itself, whereas the Lopez model is rather anodyne, like its owner. It's not about how big it is, it's what you do with it that matters.

Which brings us, in our perusal of the Best of Butt, to Shakira's ability to do so many interesting things with her bottom, which encourages me to impute a fair degree of personality to it also. Good effort there, Shaky. Keep it up, pert as it already is.

Ricky Tomlinson just makes my teeth ache. Although his wiggle to Mambo Number 5 in a great episode of The Royle Family deserves an honourable mention.

gingerbop

22:12 / 15.11.03

You people make life so difficult for me.

Kylies, I think, is the best quality, and least likely to get cellulite, cause theres nothing much of it. Its very peachy.
I will always have a soft spot for Shakira.
And JLos is fabulous too. But it might just be her clothes. At work, we all tried on this Jlo catsuit, thats like a boiler suit, but white and boob-tubed, and even in white, everyones ass looked amazing.

For my own, I'd have kylies, and for my girlfriend I'd have Shakira with Jlos bum. God, that'd make a good film.

Baz Auckland

16:26 / 05.12.03

...not to re-open this board-destroying debate, but 'Mira!' magazine just voted Shakira's bottom the best of 2003... being a Spanish tabloid they do have a bit of a bias though...

diz

19:00 / 05.12.03

i think the only way i could choose would be to have Kylie on one side of me, and JLo on the other, and have them both rubbing their naked asses all over my face for several hours.

i would be willing to endure this in the name of science.

Jonas

19:10 / 05.12.03

I vote for Mariah Carey.

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