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Please help me, Barbelith

 
  

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Seth
12:13 / 06.11.03
I feel like I'm breaking to bits.

I can't be specific right now. I'm sorry for all those people who like juicy details, but I can't go into it.

I really need some support. A few words will do.

I feel overcome with grief, my asthma's kicking in. Very lonely and very tearful.

It won't last long. Big changes are afoot and my situation will soon be very different.

I hate fuckers who start threads like this.
 
 
spidermonkey
12:15 / 06.11.03
Aw babe, I'm supporting you now like a big hammock around a sleeping sailor.
All the hugs in the World!
 
 
Tryphena Absent
12:20 / 06.11.03
Seth, you are lovely, you talk sense and watching bad anime with you is a delight. In fact you're the only person I've ever met who can make it more than bearable. I really hope that you're okay and if you still feel this bad when I next see you than perhaps you might get a shoulder rub.
 
 
Quantum
12:28 / 06.11.03
Shut yo self pitying mouth, if anyone deserves huggles it's you. You are possibly the nicest guy in the whole world, full of wisdom and kindness, funny, intelligent and friendly. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't be here, thank you for being so great, I hope your distress passes quickly and you come out of it a better man (if such a thing is possible).
We should meet IRL again for a pint soon, every time I see you it's from a distance over the heads of loads of people we have to/want to talk to so we always miss each other. To second AnnadeL, you talk sense.
Back rubs available at reasonable rates, put me on your list of people to call if you need help day or night. You rock dude.
 
 
sleazenation
12:28 / 06.11.03
just cos you are so string most of the time doesn't mean you can't feel like the world is falling occasionally. - or to put it another way - we are all here for you, man.
 
 
Quantum
12:32 / 06.11.03
Obviously "Shut yo self pitying mouth" refers to "I hate fuckers who start threads like this", I suddenly realised how bad a first line that was. I should have said 'It's good to ask for help'.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:39 / 06.11.03
I hate fuckers who start threads like this too . Except you.

But seriously, sorry to hear that things are difficult and painful right now. Without getting too omnasklaraflans, this seems to be a period in which several people whom I rate very highly are going through very stressful and emotionally draining changes in their lives. I wish you all the best. Whilst I am someone who leans towards hyperbole and sentiment when intoxicated, I meant pretty much every gushing compliment I remember giving you when last we met. You, sir, are a man of QUALITAY.

See you soon...
 
 
Sax
12:49 / 06.11.03
Yes, there's something in the air at the moment. My huggles reserves are being drawn upon greatly. Good job they're bottomless. Ace of Base to you, sir.
 
 
bitchiekittie
12:52 / 06.11.03
I hope you get through this soon. in the meantime, this hedgehog wants to huggle you:
 
 
that
12:53 / 06.11.03
I don't know you very well, seth, but you've always seemed, as they say, like a stellar bloke. Plus you drunkenly hugged me at a Barbe-meet once, simply because I pay proper attention to spelling people's screennames - and that cheered me up no end. So consider this returning the favour. *hugs*

I really hope stuff improves for you asap, and that you're feeling much better soon.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
12:53 / 06.11.03
Seth, please accept some gun-toting, gas-guzzling, overfed Stateside huggles from yours truly. You rock.
 
 
Bear
12:54 / 06.11.03
Just adding to support....have to agree with all the "nice guy" comments, everytime I've met you although granted not many I can almost feel the good karma around you...

There is something in the air though, it'll all be over on the 8th though - many magicks will be going down on Saturday night...
 
 
Seth
12:58 / 06.11.03
Thanks so much guys.

I'm going through a lot right now. The thing that triggered the break down into tears was being forced to delete all my old emails. Don't ask me why I had to do it (I'll tell you all when I'm able), but there was no way I could keep them.

All my old correspondence with people like Lothar Tuppan and Ierne, people who have meant a great deal to me who I can only keep in touch with via email. It was especially hard to delete Lothar's, he was a dear friend who taught me a lot. I just had to press my finger on delete and watch them all disappear.

It's just the thing that triggered all the grief that's been pent up over the last week or so. So much stuff that I can't take with me.

I'll use this thread to keep you guys up to date on what's happening, when I'm able to give more info.

Trying to keep in mind my objectives in doing what I'm doing right now, trying to maintain focus. It's not dying, it's initiation.

Keep it coming, if you don't mind guys. It's really appreciated. Big hugs to each and every one of you. I hope to catch up with some of you in the flesh at the Plough on Saturday...
 
 
illmatic
13:25 / 06.11.03
Seth. Really sorry to hear you're going through tough times. You're a fucking top bloke and it's always a pleasure to cach up with you in the flesh. Looking forward to seeing you at the weekend.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
13:26 / 06.11.03
Don't really have anything specific to say, except that you are one of the kindest, most level-headed, patient people on the board; you're also one of the nicest and most fascinating to meet IRL (which is saying a lot). And you gave me a little Kogi-Pan.

I hate to see you going through such a rough time. I really hope that things get better for you soon.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
13:53 / 06.11.03
Speaking as one of the "people who start threads like this", can I just say-

fucking huggles, man. Don't know you too well in meatspace, but you've always struck me as being a nice guy. And online you do truly rock.

Take care. Whatever it is, you'll get through it, though it may suck- and it sounds like it does. But you'll be OK.
 
 
Lilith Myth
14:15 / 06.11.03
Seth, the few times we've talked I've been overwhelmed with what a down-to-earth, sorted bloke you are, and all the above threadees who talk about your niceness are spot on. Hard times hurt, but they do get better. Thinking of you, virtual and real hugs.
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
14:45 / 06.11.03
seth - am thinking of you. If I could I would give you the biggest hug in the world - you deserve it.

You are one of the all-round best people I know and I really hope you pull through this in the best way for you.

You have all my support and love whenever you need it.
 
 
unheimlich manoeuvre
15:34 / 06.11.03
Seth, sorry to hear that life is getting you down.
now i don't know you in real life but i like what you've written

huge *virtual* manly back-slapping type hugs are wending their way as i speak/write.
 
 
The Strobe
15:42 / 06.11.03
Many many big hugs, big man. Take care of yourself, above all else. If you can give yourself even half the good advice, the patience, the consideration you've given to so many of use round here, I'm sure you'd get through anything.

I really do hope things pull together. Sometimes, just talking to you is enough to lift one's spirits - partly just because you make everyone feel valued; and partly because it's a reminder that there is a lot of good in the world, and sometimes it gets concentrated into individuals.

All the best.
 
 
Saveloy
16:08 / 06.11.03
Gah, seth! C'm'ere, ya big lummox! *big bosomy hug* You are a lovely, lovely man, and I really hope things work out for you. You've made loads of good friends here.
 
 
Bill Posters
16:17 / 06.11.03
look after yourself, and i will do what i can magickally.
 
 
Hieronymus
16:17 / 06.11.03
*plays a calming banjo serenade for seth*
 
 
Seth
16:35 / 06.11.03
Thanks guys.

I've accomplished everything I needed to today, which has been a real battle. Tomorrow will be far, far worse. I need all the encouragement and support my friends can offer.

My day was saved by a very dear friend who shall remain nameless (she knows who she is, because I'm gonna send her a link to this thread). At about 2pm I sent her an email sayng how awful I felt. Thirty seconds later she called and kept talking to me while I wailed and blubbered and tried to get my breath, my sobbing coming on at the same time as an asthma attack. It was like one of those movie scenes where someone has to constantly talk to a dude with a head wound to keep them conscious, to prevent them from going under. Hon, if you've read this far down the thread the entire of the Barbelith Underground now thinks you're as brilliant as I do.

Thanks for the lovely PMs from all who sent them.

Barbelith, I'm lost for words. Thank you all. I'll keep you posted...
 
 
_pin
17:57 / 06.11.03
Dude, I start threads like this, and I'm fucking great.

You are too.

(Was that touching? That was meant to be touching, but I don't know if it was... I was going fore quietly emotional. You will read it, and nod, and go Yeh... and think how incredably astute I am. I'd do all this in a txt, but I haven't got, like, three days to finely hone the fucker. That's how long it takes me to write txts to you, dammit. So yes. Touching.)
 
 
Not Here Still
18:14 / 06.11.03
Though we've never met, I like your presence on the board, man. So consider this a pat on the back and a smile from a stranger and I hope that your ship rights itself soon...
 
 
Papess
18:25 / 06.11.03
I just want to say, that even in his own melancholy state, Seth has managed to make me the happiest I have been in a week. I have a big smile on my face now and much gratitude in my heart.

Thank you, Seth. You really do rock the bandwidth.



Oh yeah...

SCROTUM!...hehehe! NO, really. Everyone should say it, it really makes you feel better. Ah, the healing power of scrotum.
 
 
grant
18:33 / 06.11.03
For what it's worth.

If having a fresh ear to holler into would do anything, I'm grantimatter@yahoo.com
 
 
Mourne Kransky
18:37 / 06.11.03
Lots of good karma bouncing back your way. Feel better soon. (((HUG)))
 
 
Baz Auckland
19:30 / 06.11.03
Best of luck tomorrow, and yeah!
 
 
angel
19:31 / 06.11.03
Oh seth! Such turmoil and upheaval. I have an urge to try to make it all better, but all I have is huggles.

If anyone can come through this trouble and learn and grow, it's you. You are unfailingly kind and suportive of everyone here and your more serious posts are always thought provoking. You have an awareness of yourself that would put most people to shame and you have a whole raft of people here who are grateful that they have you in their lives.

Be gentle with yourself and know that you are beloved by many, many people here. As this thread witnesses.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
21:37 / 06.11.03
Oh, seth. What you're going through sounds utterly hateful, and I'm sorry it's happening to you - you have always seemed to me to be entirely deserving of good stuff and good stuff only. You do indeed rock, and I'll be thinking of you.
 
 
SMS
22:40 / 06.11.03
Thank you, Seth, for being.

I wish you the best and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
22:50 / 06.11.03
Mwah, *so* sorry to hear you're having hard stuff, hon.

Huge amounts of hugs and spare good energy on their way to you.

You, as many people here have said, are a rare and lovely person.

And the payoff is in the wealth of support/care flowing around you here and elsewhere. Use it, and us.

You'll win through.

Hugs.(if you need a getaway, you know where i am,hon.)


(oh and loads of people I care about, me included, seem to be under it atm, it's that kind of time. But we'll get through it, all of us.)
 
 
bio k9
00:52 / 07.11.03
Sending you good thoughts, yo.
 
  

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