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*Lopes up the red carpeted steps, shrugging off hordes of adoring fishnet-clad groupies*
Mind the tailcoat, darlin'.
*A groupie girl, eyes wild with excitement, whips out a packet of Bic razors and throws them to the crowd. A frenzy of spontaneous head-shaving erupts.*
Yeah, uh, hi there. It's great to be here for this historic moment. Little did I know all those years ago when I signed up to Barbelith that I'd one day be up here in the spotlight, taking the Ganesh award for 1000th PM. I'd like to thank my friends, my family, and all the little people behind the scenes, without whom this 1000th PM would not have been possible: the guys over at the easyinternet cafe, the Spanish telephone company, Champion, the supermarket with the really cheap beer, and all the complete knobheads on Barbelith that I bitch about to the rest of the moderator clique. Just kidding! Just kidding! Whoops, where's me bunker? Wahey, ect.
*Disappears in a flurry of face-powder and moulting sequins, taking most of the booze and a couple of the less lacerated groupies* |
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