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Which one of you is a spy?

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We're The Great Old Ones Now

14:45 / 30.05.03

Talking to some old friends last night, and one of them observed that in days of yore, an outfit like Barbelith would have been infiltrated and surveilled as a matter of course, just in case any of you pinko radical fantasists decided to blow up the House of Commons or something - or more likely, in order to spread dissent and disinformation.

An activity with which, generally speaking, we need no external assistance... Unless... That's precisely what we're supposed to think?

So working on the basis that you'll immediately fess up and we'll never learn anything, and yet at the same time creating a dreadful psychological dilemma of whether to treat the question as a joke for any actual spies...

Which of you is in the employ of a government agency?!!?

You may, of course, choose to denounce one another.

You know. For kids.

14:50 / 30.05.03

it's not me, i swear.
i think we should point our fingers at the most radical-seeming among us--it's all a front so that they're least suspected!!!

Regrettable Juvenilia

14:57 / 30.05.03

What would be really cool would be if one of us was supposedly doing this, but was actually a double-agent - like Giles in that episode of Spooks. Working their way up the ranks of the Circus, having our way with Matthew MacFayden/Keeley Hawes (take your pick), feeding disinformation... Ready to bring the whole house of cards crashing down one fateful day, when the time is right.

Sadly, it's not me. Tsk. I knew I should have applied for that job in the civil service...

15:02 / 30.05.03

What do you mean 'in days of yore'? I didn't attend highschool for 4 years, watch all the James Bond movies, give myself a phd in spystuff and join CSIS just to be considered a throwback to 'days of yore'!!! Im the elite of the elite..this place is sooo damn spied upon that no one knows it. um.... until now I guess. This is Agent Kegboy signing out.

The post you have just read will selfdestruct in 5 seconds.

If you believe that I have a gold mine I'd like to sell you.

15:03 / 30.05.03

I can neither confirm nor deny that I may or may not be in the employ of an agency which may or may not exist, either officially or objectively.

Still, I'd watch myself, were I you.

15:06 / 30.05.03

It's me. No, really, picture this: I pretend not to talk the language properly, or to be interested in the bulk of what makes Barbelith what it is - queer politics, magick etc -, pretending to be around just for the guffaws and, of course I can't care less for British politics. Who'd have thunk ov it??? Before you notice there will be guerilla teams and hulk dogs busting your turfs down and you won't even know what hit you. Downside is, they're paying me in Reais. Bummer.

15:14 / 30.05.03

Ha ha! Kegboy is in the CSIS! Canadian spies just seem, like, the silliest idea...ha!

Barbelith can't possibly have a double agent. If there was one, they would make Barbelith the most wanted terrorist group in the UK, just for laughs. And we would find it all funny to see "BARBELITH!" on the front page of the Daily Mail...

...except Tom, who would be in jail. But we would stage rallies to get him released. And we would all get our own TV shows out of the fame!

15:24 / 30.05.03

Mole, mole, go to your hole!

Less searchable M0rd4nt

15:26 / 30.05.03

Not technically a spy, as such, but I'm taking down the odd note or two. Someone comes along with a good enough offer and I'll sell your arses down the river like a shot.

While we're on the subject-- my piggybank's a wee bit light at the moment. Any government agents out there with a quota to fill?

15:32 / 30.05.03

Mordant: I can neither confirm nor deny that I may or may not be prepared to shower you with the tall Yanqui dollar in exchange for the alleged information you may or may not allegedly possess.

Watch for a man in a panama hat.

15:44 / 30.05.03

Baz: Ofcourse its a silly idea...we spend lots of time and money carefully crafting such an image. We're nasty, dangerous..spooky.

CSIS: The spy agency so damn good and secret nobody knew it existed until the guy in charge put 'Head Of CSIS' on his tax return.

We're The Great Old Ones Now

16:04 / 30.05.03

The Yanqui dollar is tall?

Weird. I always figured it for a short guy in a bad hat like the one Harpo Marx wears.

(Oops! Damn. I bet Mordant just wrote that down...)

16:16 / 30.05.03

I spy with my little eye something that begins with "s."

Less searchable M0rd4nt

16:31 / 30.05.03

Jack Fear: "Dollars"? Pffft. I want paying in hard liquor, chuck keys and digital watch batteries. When you have the information, you'll understand why.

17:21 / 30.05.03

Hmmm. Well, I'm not really a spy per se, but I do know people who've been involved in some fairly dodgy stuff involving people who may or may not have represented some kind of quasi-governmental agency, and I have met people who I do occassionally suspect of being spies...

So much so, in fact, that I play 'who's the spy' whenever I enter a new place of employment. I was fairly suspicious on my last training placement, when one of the teachers went 'missing', and no-one on the staff would tell me why, and they kept introducing these constantly rotated supply teachers to replace her, and then one of them started trying to get to know me...But I don't really think she was a spy. She was pretty nice, really. And I never told her anything that important. I think.

Fortunately, I don't have this problem with the school I'm gonna be teaching at for real come September. It's in Durham - the Cambridge of the North. They're probably all spies. I'll fit right in.

Whisky Priestess

17:27 / 30.05.03

Ha! I wish. Then I might be on more than the miserable pittance I currently earn. Not only am I dyspolitical, I applied for MI6 and failed the judgement test. Ah me ...

23:56 / 30.05.03

I temp for a state government, so I guess I'm double agenting, but incompetently and with little motivation.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

00:00 / 31.05.03

And those little round glass pebbles. Going to need plenty of them. Yessir.

Tryphena Absent

00:15 / 31.05.03

Well I'm a high ranking official in the KGB. No, really, we're still going strong. I take a highly top secret potion to keep my youthful good looks but really I'm a rather paranoid 55 year old woman who can shoot a mouse dead at a hundred paces.

00:15 / 31.05.03

well all those protestations just seem to further incriminate spyness to me!

Though maybe that's what you want me to think and it's all those claiming to have some spy connotations who are double bluffing!

Having said that, how do I know that Barbelith is really what it claims to be and I'm not just being run down the water by some folk taking down all I say in a slightly MordantC manner, who are attempting to ruin my future lord of all the universe & creation plans?

00:55 / 31.05.03

OMG! What if we're all sleeper agents and when the correct trigger thread is started we'll fall out of our programed characters (what I like to call meatland fictionsuits) and start on our true missions...whatever they may be. I think mine may have something to do with wearing a cheeseslice on my head.

Tryphena Absent

01:21 / 31.05.03

cheeses lice. That sounds bad.

01:25 / 31.05.03

but go great with a nice merlot.

Tryphena Absent

01:30 / 31.05.03

Heh... more like screw up a nice merlot.

Strange Machine Vs The Virus with Shoes

01:51 / 31.05.03

I am probably likely to become a spy. I do not hate you, but there is a growing level of animosity towards you all, cursing through my veins, or my mind or my perineum. Mind you, would I make a good spy? Well, my years in Hounslow West will attest to that.

01:53 / 31.05.03

"I do not hate you, but there is a growing level of animosity towards you all, cursing through my veins, or my mind or my perineum."

This is not a sign that you would make a good spy. This is a sign theat you may take to a clock tower and thin out the neighbourhood.

01:54 / 31.05.03

and another thing, what if all that lovely Merlot is just some kind of slow acting poisonous resin that will slowly turn me/us (can't be too sure) into some business type suit wearing unethical bonus claiming repressive bosses?

Perhaps that how it all starts, one bottle or so and you're on the slippery slope

Tryphena Absent

01:57 / 31.05.03

Well at least you had a good drink on your way to repressing the sullen masses.

01:58 / 31.05.03

Im about to open a bottle of pear wine..If the previous theory holds true then perhaps this bottle will turn me into a tree huggling hippy.

02:15 / 31.05.03

or perhaps that just what they want you to think - more likely it will supress any true hippy ideals and lead you into thinking of doing a bit of gardening on the weekend

02:18 / 31.05.03

yes... I like gardening. Gardening is good. The Good Earth. Plants. Of all kinds. And weeds. Of one kind.

02:24 / 31.05.03

Long as you keep those borders neat. And weeds? do you not mean uncultivated butterfly attracting shrubbery plants?

02:55 / 31.05.03

Canadian spies just seem, like, the silliest idea...ha!

Hssssssssssss......

03:00 / 31.05.03

No Moriarty..Let him keep his foolish ideas..
For soon Canada shall reign terror upon the globe the likes of which none have seen before!!

...or maybe we'll invite the world to the mother of all backyard barb-Qs.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

11:23 / 31.05.03

I'm not a spy but I might be mafia...

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