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D00d, where's my job?

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08:09 / 18.04.03

This is an outrage! We must save Haus for the nation! I'm sure the National Trust would cut a deal with you, just have to let us oiks come round for tea & absinthe one afternoon a week and gaze at your splendour.

At least you can live off Ganesh' body fat for a bit, when you're time-sharing that fictionsuit.

All the research shows that unfeasibly tall people find jobs more easily than us moderately proportioned types. You should have taken out a patent on the huggle™ and the schnoogle™ and you'd never have had to work again.

pointless and uncalled for

10:40 / 18.04.03

stoatie - yes indeed I work for the fucker Irvine. I can't see the problems with him just because he has a wallpaper fetish, we should be understanding and supportive. In fact as I understand it we already have.

Apologies for the thread hijack - please return to consoling Haus. I'm habitually unemployed and very used to regular periods of income free existence.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

12:50 / 18.04.03

d00d, that sux0rz. I´ll keep a gravestone warm for ya. A pointy pointy gravestone. With ivy on it. Oh yes.

ONLY NICE THINGS

13:12 / 24.04.03

Well, that's it. I am now officially redundant. Or unofficially redundant. I've been told that I'm redundant, anyway. No more job.

Feeling quite good about it at present, helped by the fact that three people have so far said they would use me for freelance work if I wanted to go down that route, one of whom I've never met, so that's good, I guess. Anyone know what a freelance copywriter should charge? That's probably were I'd start...

13:20 / 24.04.03

Really sorry about the job, Haus. Good that you have alternatives already though. Best of luck...

Hattie's Kitchen

13:27 / 24.04.03

Ouch, sorry to hear that Haus, but from the sounds of it you won't be kicking your heels for long. Good luck.

13:38 / 24.04.03

yeah - that is really unfortunate, but it will probably lead to better things.

14:16 / 24.04.03

Haus - bugger, bugger, bugger, damn! But it is better to know than be hanging in suspense!

Meme Buggerer, Ariadne, Rothkoid and Sleaze are the people who I immediately think of as people to ask about Copywriter prices. Also if it's for Advertising or PR/Promo purposes you could perhaps try their national associations for price guidelines. Actually thinking about it along those lines, Lyra Lovelaces (I can't remember what ze calls hirself now) is perhaps another source of info and maybe even work.

Huggles and best wishes hon!

14:21 / 24.04.03

Fuck snigs. Never mind, a whole new vista of opportunities has opened itself up to you now. Fuck 'em all.

14:35 / 24.04.03

Mmm, big scary step into freelancing. I'm afraid I have absolutely nothing of use to contribute, Haus, other than my best wishes and the right half of my cranium.

Oh yeah, and if you don't get freelance work soon, I'll testify to your previous character deficiences (you slapper) and watch you starve then rot. LeapStyle...

Tryphena Absent

14:41 / 24.04.03

Go for the money... or the puppies and the kittens and the liddle fluffy bunny wabbits.

17:04 / 24.04.03

See, if this had happened two weeks ago, you could have seen ten whole episodes of Smallville through a fug of real-ale-induced cerebal beard growth at half 10 in the morning.

Bugger.

17:55 / 24.04.03

Anyone know what a freelance copywriter should charge? That's probably were I'd start...

First: if you've already got people offering you work, you've got the hardest (the very hardest) part of freelancing out of the way. So bully for you.

The charge will depend on the kind of copywriting. In my experience (which is in journalism, or more properly "journalism"), the client/producer just gives a flat fee for all freelancers, which might increase with your seniority or exclusiveness to a publication.

I remember the London Sun paid $75 for a short article... which was more than Telegraph, Mail or Mirror (generally $50 for a quarter-page story). That's early 90s prices, though. I imagine they've gone up for inflation.

18:48 / 24.04.03

Having just watched a BBC documentary on this, may I suggest becomgina bailiff? Ignorig all the rubbishy bits like taking people's children away to become slaves and congestion charging, it seems so cool!

I never imagined there would be a job where you'd have to drive to north London and take stuff from stupid posh white people who won't pay parking tickets. How cool is that?? And you can be super rude to them and when they go "paid taxes for years and never got anything from this council... " you can inform them that they're stupid fucking knob faced wankers and that the council takes the rubbish away and lays roads and puts traffic lights and zebra crossings around so their children don't get horribly mangled by cars and evicts scruffy poor people from the area.

And, due to some realy fucked up pecking-ordering, you can still have a go at wheel clampers for chooseing to be wheel clampers dispite A: the fact that you need wheel clampers to clamp rich white people's expensive cars and B: you're a fucking bailiff! HELLO!!

18:55 / 24.04.03

I saw that programme - Haus, you would make the world's most entertaining baliff ever. You could take their goods and make them feel really stupid.

I'm sure you wouldn't actually being v. nice fella.

I think the thing is with freelancing is you can simply charge exorbitant sums, is that not the case? Let's hope so...

ONLY NICE THINGS

21:28 / 24.04.03

Well, tsomebody has proposed a number, but that was a prospective employer, so who knows? And looks liek it may be back-burnered anyway...

I don't know - part of me is thinking "But I can't do that! I am an employee of (insert name here)! It would be unethical! Oh, hang on..."

It's just the way that the value of my labour is about quartered by that judgement, although the actual change is no more profound than not interacting with a boss. Then again, I'd see a lot more of it...

All very peculiar. I've never really been unemployed. Well, for a fortnight or so in 1998, but apart from that. I suspect I may have to make some adjustments. Maybe get some melee weapons, you know.

On the bright side, I can now do pro bono work for cool people that I couldn't commit to before, because I wouldn't be able to guarantee the time. Which is nice.

08:59 / 25.04.03

Dude! You're no longer a slave of the MAN! Congratulations and good luck and welcome to the happy shiny world of the freelancer, as you roam the mean streets of London on your charger with your shiny free lance twinkling in the sunshine, ready to, um, write copy at a moment's notice! Now you can write copy in a cute little notebook sitting in a cafe a la JK Rowling, and then make a deal with Coca-Cola for twenty trillion dollars, and go home to your single-mother council flat but not be able to open the door because of the drifts of cash clogging it up!

Or, you know, commiserations*, if you'd rather.

*That doesn't look right. SHould it have a double 's'? Surely not.

09:00 / 25.04.03

Also I can think of certain people (and mutoids) on a spaceship in Limbo who will be happy to hear that you have time on your hands.

10:03 / 25.04.03

Good luck, dude. I don't know what else to say other than that sucks but you've got a good new opportunity so all is not lost.

I agree with Xoc on Huggle and Shnoogle though. Too late now I guess!

Lilly Nowhere Late

20:03 / 25.04.03

I know where there is a job going for a communications worker. Press
releases and public statements and that sort. It pays all right and
is for a good cause. PM me if you want more info. O and it is
London.All best wishes!

06:31 / 28.04.03

And go buy The Guardian today, for the media jobs. But then you knew that.

And try: www.holdthefrontpage.co.uk to look at what's on offer in local newspapers.

07:24 / 28.04.03

Haus, belated whatevers... I've been offline.

Don't know if you're still thinking about freelance copywriting: try this site, online content, and sign up for their email job list. There's a couple of other email lists, the chinwag one. And PM me for rates, if you want.

Good luck. I got laid off from an internet company exactly two years ago, and I spent six months feeling sorry for myself, and then once I'd *decided* to be self employed, never been happier. Best decision blah blah blah. Honest.

No star here laces

08:04 / 28.04.03

Arse. Sorry to hear that, especially since you were probably the only person here with a more sell-out job than me.

Going rate for good quality freelance advertising copywriters is of the order of £500/day, but you'd need specific advertising experience to get that. But the basic point is you get paid a lot more for that sort of corporate stuff than you would for journalistic work, hence the "quartering" of your hourly rate...

THe single most important thing to do is phone the benefits office right away and arrange an appointment - they will only pay your dole/housing benefit/council tax benefit from the moment you contact them, rather than the moment you became unemployed.

Also I know of a job going for a "bubbly receptionist/office manager aged 21-25" so if you want to get the Oil of Olay out, give me a call.

08:30 / 28.04.03

Yeah, sorry to hear that old bean – best of luck with things.

17:55 / 19.09.03

Dood who cares.

22:08 / 19.09.03

I would be interested in hearing more about people's experiences with chucking their day jobs in favor of self employment or careers.

23:06 / 19.09.03

Hmm. Im vaguely considering it. In fact, at the moment, thats effectively what Im doing.

Someone is hiding my real job in their pants, so im only selling glasses i paint just now. Havent got round to actually making is a business and paying tax tho (not that id get past £4000 + whatever anyway) but its keeping me alive and sane. If i keep going at this rate, I'll get round to making up a portfolio, taking it round more places, and then maybe eventually I will be able to do it fulltime, and not bother looking for a real job.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

23:53 / 19.09.03

Well, yay you, gingerbop! That sounds great-- wish I'd thought of doing something like that at your age.

01:54 / 20.09.03

Do it.

It doesn't have to be your choice for life but it's certainly worth it for as long as you enjoy it and can make money out of it. I worked my way up to being a company director at age 28, hated it and left to work by myself a year later. I've been self employed for 14 years now and, although I am currently trying to get a full time employee type job status again now, I've not regretted my decision to go self employed too often in the intervening years.

It's the financial aspects that can be a pain, and the paperwork. I went through years of struggling with bugger all money somewhere in the middle but somehow, don't ask me how, something always turned up to keep me afloat.

Sometimes the solitude of the whole thing, particularly if you work from home, can be a drag but self employed people tend to gravitate towards each other so you end up being able to spend quiet afternoons in the pub playing pool together or (insert pastime of choice here) when things get quiet. You charge a lot more per hour than everyone else for your time so working solid 9 - 5 hours becomes a thing of the past. The busy times let you afford a very different lifestyle in terms of when you work and how hard.

If you are good with forward planning and have the wherewithal to make sure your future is looked after with things like self funded superannuation (or whatever the equivalent concept is where you are) then you are set. This has been my problem y'see, I'm crap at forward planning and am now at an age where I worry about how I'll afford to grow old, so I want a job again.

I was in the UK for the first half of this year trying to establish myself there. I gave up and came home but that's just me. While I was there I did a Business Start-Up course with the local Chamber of Commerce. Do it. It's excellent and really will equip you with all of the knowledge you need to handle the business side of things. I did it, even after all these years of running my own business, to learn the local rules and regs as my Australian experience didn't always fit what I was encountering. I learned things that could have saved me a lot of the hassle I went through years ago, even here.

23:17 / 20.09.03

I'v done/ am doing business management, and its pretty good for that kinda stuff. You get to know all the employee and health and safety etc regulations, learn what to put in ur business plan, where to get capital etc. But right now i'll just stick to doing the glasses, selling them, and not being a proper business. For a start, accounts terrify me. Like run and hide terrify. Funny i should be talking about those 2 things in the same post- it was my B.M. teacher who 1st got me glass-painting, for an Xmas mini-company years ago. *sigh* those were the days...

16:09 / 22.09.03

Justified Ancient of Mu writes: I did a Business Start-Up course with the local Chamber of Commerce. Do it

This sounds like a great idea. I'm sure there's some sort of American equivalent. gingerbop, have you looked into whether you're eligible for any small business loans? It has been suggested to me that there are a number of small privately-funded organizations which provide generous terms for first-time entrepreneurs. They may be mythical, but it seems worth investigating. Have you learned anything about this in your course?

16:17 / 22.09.03

so haus - what happened?

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