One advantage of promoting close familial ties is that they are multi-generational. Tasks need to be performed at various stages in life, and these interlock in a very effective way if done well.
Parents, of course, have an obligation to their children. Family gatherings at times like Thanksgiving and Christmas play an important role in maintaining mental health. And therefore in maintaining physical health. Why? Because we need to feel we are part of a larger organism. For someone leading an active social life with plenty of friends may not significantly benefit from close ties with family, but none of us live an active social life all the time. Many people go through states of depression, and loneliness. And what do we find? That at these times, friends are LESS likely to call on you. Because, as they say, you can pick your friends.
But in giving us the option to pick our friends, we lose something we can count on. Because what does it take to terminate a friendship? Just stop calling. That's it. Nothing big. What does it take to terminate your status as son, daughter, cousin, or sibling? It may be done, I suppose, but it always seems a big deal.
"His parents disowned him."
"Wow. That sucks. Just for that? Man, that pisses me off."
And when you are older, and your friends start to die off, what happens to you? Your spouse is gone, and your medical bills are draining you? Can you live alone anymore? Can you even walk?
Of course, a family can be worse for you than none at all. Abusive parents are all too common. There are sometimes reasons to avoid particular family memebers, or even all family memebers. But this seems a great sacrifice. One, perhaps worth making, but a sacrifice nonetheless. |
didn't explain that well, did I?