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Bigmouth Strikes Again

 
 
deja_vroom
10:16 / 13.11.02
Inspired by the spider thread:


Look at those eyes bleak eyes. And those teeth. Unlike tigers, for instance, shark's teeth aren't like a slightly curled cone. They're fucking blades. This animal is nothing more than a big mouth with a body bag attached to it. Once I saw one in an aquarium, and it saw me, and came in my direction. Halfway through, it changed its direction and started to move away. But then it opened it's mouth... and it's maxillar protruded. This thing enjoys eatig so much, it has to augment its bite size so it can chew more puny humans at once. Brrr.
Those eyes. Those eyes...


P.S.: I know sharks are not that dangerous - just like spiders, so don't get all Discovery Channel on me.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
10:28 / 13.11.02
I've stroked one. At New Orleans aquarium they have a petting pool with tiny sharks in. It felt quite nice, rough but smooth. I highly recommend it.
 
 
deja_vroom
10:35 / 13.11.02
No you don't. No, Bizunth-Man-Without-Fear, you don't!
 
 
w1rebaby
13:58 / 13.11.02
I heard on the radio that someone in Australia had come up with an idea for surfers to avoid shark attacks by dressing up like bumblebees.

His company had researched how to get cows to avoid electric fences without having to be shocked, and they came to the conclusion that if you paint them black and yellow cows stay away. Because it looks like a bumblebee. Apparently. So he reckons if you paint your surfing gear black and yellow you'll repel sharks.

The flaw here seems to be that sharks are unlikely to have come across bumblebees and probably wouldn't be that bothered by them anyway. It may have been a slightly incomplete report, though.
 
 
grant
14:01 / 13.11.02
Yeah, try turning a corner around a coral head, 15 feet deep, breathhold diving, and coming face to face with a six foot lemon shark (one of the kinds that eat people).

Everything except your skeleton will immediately jump 10 feet out of the water.



Nuts.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
21:16 / 13.11.02
The shark in that book cover looks like it's coming to the climax of a crooner's tune... "...I did it... myyyyyyyyyy way!"

There should be more sharks playing Vegas. Tony Bennett, live on-stage with a white pointer. THERE'S a show that'd break box-office records.

But hey, I live in Australia. We have sharks here. Big 'uns. Lots of 'em. Shark netted beaches! Which doesn't help, as they occasionally have all the security and anti-teethfish action of a pair of holed pantyhose.

Oh, and the harbour's now so clean that sharks have been seen further up the Parramatta river than they've ever been for over 150 years.

Whatthefuck?
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
06:33 / 14.11.02
That's nothing, Roth- there's a fucking OCTOPUS in the Mersey!

Ooh. Sharks.

Sharks are good.

However, living in inland UK is also good. Sharks may not be so good if they were local.
 
 
Hattie's Kitchen
06:43 / 14.11.02
The Mersey Octopus is cool, although it's only small - imagine a space-hopper with tentacles and you get the idea.

I like to call him "Kevin".
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
06:46 / 14.11.02
You've actually SEEN the octopus? Cool!
 
 
Hattie's Kitchen
06:59 / 14.11.02
I'll show you the pictures, stoatie!

But sharks are fanfuckingtastic as well, although sadly not as approachable as the oh so playful monarch of the seas...
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
08:42 / 14.11.02
Octopi rock. You know they're pirates.
 
 
Hattie's Kitchen
08:44 / 14.11.02
True - but then sharks are definitely ninjas...
 
 
sleazenation
09:14 / 14.11.02
You want a big mouth? i give you

the megamouth shark...
 
 
deja_vroom
09:48 / 14.11.02
You know, I never thought about this... sharks are underwater ninjas... Cool. That's why you don't want to get closer to them.
 
  
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