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Hi, Sypha. Here’s my crib notes for the thing. (However, you don’t actually need to know what happened in #4 to be able to follow/enjoy #5, and My Mis… has summed events up fine already, so you might prefer to ignore this and wait ‘till you see a copy of the comic yourself.)
Filth #4 was very “TV” – it was like an episode of X-Files or Murder She Wrote, in some ways. So, in keeping with that spirit…
Previously, on The Filth:
Greg / Ned unties Replacement Greg and leaves him out of the closet. Before he goes off to work, he tells Replacement Greg to refrain from fucking up his life while he’s gone, and to look after Tony.
As Greg and Dimitri drive off in the Filthmobile, there’s an evil grimace on Replacement Greg’s face. “Oh, don’t worry…I’ll take care of Tony…I’ll ‘take care’ of him good. Heh-heh. Heh. MwWAHAHAHAHAHAHA.”
Meanwhile, a dead body’s been found on a rubbish dump. The person seems to’ve died of old age…except…the person’s i.d. and stuff says they’re only sixteen years old. This is apparently just one of a string of similar murders. An agent of the Hand arrives at the crime scene to help in the investigation – his name is Honey Hitler – he’s got an incredibly sensitive sense of smell – just by sniffing you he can tell all sorts of nasty, personal stuff about you. And it turns out that Greg / Ned has been partnered with him for the investigation.
They go off to the Crack – Ned gets a quick tour of these mountains of rubbish and old porn that they’ve got there. You’ve got to wear special suits coz otherwise you’d age prematurely in this environment. Honey H. figures that the murderer is somehow bringing folk from the Ordinary World to the porn mountains (without protective suits, of course), and letting them die here, before returning them back “topside”.
SUDDENLY!! The ‘copter they’re flying in gets attacked by the monsters that roam this land, and it goes crashing to the ground!! (Remember when Scott, Wolverine and the pig-face guy crashed the X-jet over Cassandra’s gaff? It was like that.)
Honey H. and Ned, stranded in this hostile environment, with little to no chance of making it back to Hand Headquarters before their suits get eaten away by Time…
They trek off towards a Hand research outpost that’s out here – but when they finally get to it, they find it’s been attacked by the monsters, and everyone’s dead.
No hope now. They sit down, and drink each other’s piss, so as to become “piss brothers”.
THEN!! Ned ATTACKS Honey Hitler!! He penetrates Honey’s chest with an old spiky bone! “FUCK YOU!” Ned ejaculates. “I knew you were the murderer all along!! YOU killed those people!”
“Yeah, I did!” Honey sez. “Babies, I killed! And I liked it too! Uh, I mean…What I meant to say was, the bacteria made me do it!! The bacteria control us, Ned!! Living things! Inside us! Nnnnggaarrrghhh!”
“Shut it, you!” Ned barks. “Ha! Do you see what I’m doing? I’m swapping your piss tube for your oxygen tube! I’m going to drown you in your own piss!! Ha! I don’t have time for your stupid gibbering nihilism, coz I’ve got somebody to live for! I’ve got to get back to Tony!!”
“Glub! Glub!” is Honey’s rejoinder.
Ned tramps off towards Hand Headquarters. In a very clever way, which I can’t possibly hope to reproduce, we see that time passes. And finally, his protective suit falling to shreds around him, and his mind in shreds too, Ned just manages to stagger to safety. As he collapses thru the Headquarters doors, he’s moaning something about how he promised he’d be back for Tony.
….and that’s about it.
Oh yeah, Honey Hitler was able to diagnose what was wrong with Tony simply by the smell from him on Ned – and his diagnosis was different from what the vet said…
And there was this Giant Hand in a force-field in the background of one panel that captured my imagination…but no one else around here seems to be v. curious about it…
Listen, I’ve got to warn you that the above summary is probably my own distorted memory of issue four – and “Honey Hitler” isn’t that guy’s real name, I just can’t remember what the proper name is – and if I wasn’t already sufficiently aware of how people can have very different perceptions of the same comic book, then the Filth#5 thread has recently hammered that point home for me – so, you know, treat the above with a pinch or two of salt… |
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