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Underground > Creation >

Isn't it time for a new one-sentence story?

  
  

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cusm
13:43 / 27.09.02
Now alone again at last, Jesse looks to John, his eyes gleaming with murderous intent.
 
 
Sax
14:24 / 27.09.02
"Don't mind me," wheezed Dad from the floor.
 
 
cusm
16:58 / 27.09.02
"You know I've always hated you, John," began Jesse, as he cooly picked up a sharp kitchen knife, "with your acne scarred face, your desperate staged suicides as pleas for attention, and your constant wanking to Superman comics - DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW!"
 
 
Ganesh
04:07 / 28.09.02
"Tchyeah," sneered John, his pitted features contorting in sarcasm and fraternal hatred, "because wanking over the IKEA catalogue is so much more normal, isn't it...?"
 
 
Saint Keggers
01:37 / 29.09.02
"Ikea! Is! Sweedish! For! Common! Sense!", he screamed, marking each word with a downward knife thrust into his fathers back.
 
 
gridley
17:20 / 30.09.02
"Hey!" yelled their father, "I don't suppose anyone cares that dying has turned me into a god, eh? A G-O-fuckin'-D GOD!"
 
 
cusm
18:37 / 30.09.02
And with that final deluded gasp, the senile old bastard slumped over dead.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
21:22 / 30.09.02
Again.
 
 
gridley
12:22 / 01.10.02
"So," said Jesse, checking his father's pulse, then discretely pocketing his glass eye, "Anyone mind if I take the car then? Thought not."
 
 
cusm
14:55 / 01.10.02
John just shook his head, and shuffled off back to bed, leaving Jesse to himself.
 
 
Mr Tricks
18:34 / 01.10.02
As Jesse sat in his father's brand new H2 Hummer fussing with the custom designed 12 CD changer, he bairly noticed the whimpering of Zeek their 23 year old Irish Wolf Hound, that changed the moment his bowls released a loud gush of undigested food, water and play doe of a variety of colors.
 
 
Ganesh
12:01 / 02.10.02
Jesse paused from his reverie long enough to notice and marvel that an elderly dog, sans opposable thumb, could manipulate crockery at all.
 
 
gridley
12:41 / 02.10.02
Clearly the dog had been carrying the bowls in his mouth, but why was the little wolf hound soaking play doe in undigested food in the first place? One of his experiments?
 
 
Ganesh
12:47 / 02.10.02
And why was a deer (a female deer) choosing to play in this way with a (two-sentence) dog?
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
13:19 / 02.10.02
Meanwhile, in Russia, sinister plans were afoot.
 
 
Saint Keggers
18:17 / 02.10.02
But the truelly evil plans in Norway were a foot and a half..
 
 
Mr Tricks
18:31 / 02.10.02
"oh, sorry about the mess"... the 2 sentence dawg muttered in an obviously scottish accent.
 
 
gridley
15:38 / 03.10.02
"You know me and my filthy addiction to animal pornography," he said picking up the copy of PlayDoe, and heading back to his treehouse.
 
 
NewPickettywitch
04:46 / 04.10.02
Discreetly, he slunk back in horror, dropping the rolled P-D as he stared at the treehouse.
 
 
gridley
13:58 / 08.10.02
"I don't even know my own dog," said Jesse under his breath, letting his head collapse onto the dashboard, "I use my brother as a sex toy, I have let my father die a thousand times, I've hurt a good woman, and if I go the party tonight, Linus will demand I drink turpentine!"
 
 
Mr Tricks
17:37 / 08.10.02
"hmmm..." Jesse muttered to himself, "Maybe I can get Zeek to drink the turpintine and use Linus as a sex toy?"
 
 
cusm
21:14 / 08.10.02
Jesse smiled as new evil plans ticked together in his head, revved up the Humvee and headed over to the party.
 
 
Mr Tricks
21:45 / 08.10.02
The Hummvee screeched to a stop as Jesse realized a fatal flaw in his plan, Zeek was now in his tree house doing God-know-what with his latest copy of Play-Doe Magazine.
 
 
Saint Keggers
04:38 / 09.10.02
"Thank goodness", he thought,"trees are flammable and thank goodness, I have a match" he said looking at the treeshouse in the distance.
 
 
000
22:11 / 09.10.02
Meanwhile, the evil Norwegian Tree Preservation Hood were in the final stages of placing their snitch near Jesse; oh, the delicious plans they had in mind...
 
 
Saint Keggers
00:35 / 10.10.02
They knew would get away with it, having already killed "those meddling kids and their dog too".
 
 
gridley
14:11 / 10.10.02
They probably didn't really need to kill the dog, just letting it run off into the night would have been enough, but Casper and Jose had insisted on it, even relishing the smell and taste of the dog's brain.
 
 
cusm
17:29 / 10.10.02
Fortunately, Jose was a rather small chum, so the dog's skin fit well over him, allowing him to lay a devious ambush for Jesse in the tree house.
 
 
000
22:04 / 10.10.02
Casper felt strangely attracted to Jose with the dog skin covering his whole naked body.
 
 
Saint Keggers
02:54 / 11.10.02
Their tryst was short-lived as Jose only wanted to hump Caspers leg which left Casper wanting to have Jose spayed.
 
 
000
15:49 / 11.10.02
Unbeknownst to them, during their short-lived tryst, Jesse had poured oil all around the tree, doing so with that handsome quizzical expression of his.
 
 
cusm
15:54 / 11.10.02
"Do you smell something," quizzed Jose?
 
 
Mr Tricks
18:45 / 11.10.02
"zeek!!! you poor bastard of a dawg!!! jump or I'll burn your whole damn tree house down!!!" Jesse shouted eager to see the look on his paniced dog's face.
 
 
gridley
20:04 / 11.10.02
Jose looked into the eyes of his man-love, then at the fearsome flames licking greedily at the walls of the treehouse, then back to his lover, shrugged, said "Goodbye, darling Casper," and leapt down into Jesse's waiting arms.
 
 
000
19:07 / 12.10.02
Jesse backed off, letting Jose hit the ground and thereby kill himself by the impact; there was no way in hell that he would injure his back trying to save a heavy dog.
 
  

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