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You might be a barbelithian if....

  
 
Rage
18:51 / 12.06.02
-You want to join some secret society of ESPers as we play catch with some trippy looking ball Mind Moving Style
 
 
Saint Keggers
19:47 / 12.06.02
When someone mentions ninja..you immeadiatly yell, "They will die under a pirate blade, their footie pyjamas soaked in blood, carion for my parrot to feed on!!! Arr"

or

When someone mentions pirate..you immeadiatly yell, "They are drunken fools who will die under the supreme fighting skills of ninja. We strike with invisible ninja powers!!"
 
 
autopilot disengaged
22:10 / 12.06.02
>sniff<

actually, i'm second-generation barbelithian.
 
 
Yay Paul
23:43 / 12.06.02
If the first thing you do when youget up is load Barb...
Or is that me just being sad ?

Oh well sad or not i still have my whisky and late night signing tv
 
 
rizla mission
10:38 / 13.06.02
if you giggle whenever anyone mentions lizards

if people who have examined your bookcase treat you with great suspicion

if you go to the comics shop twice a week, but really dread it, like going to the dentist..

if you have press cuttings about ritual vampire murders and psychic energy experiments stuck your bedroom wall, but don't consider this to be unusual or unhealthy..

(this should be a Noel Coward music hall style song, and the chorus should start about now)

Altogether now, YOU'RE A...
 
 
Sax
10:44 / 13.06.02
If you go to the comics shop twice a week, but really dread it, like going to the dentist..

Heh. Nice one, Riz.

...you'e ever got drunk and scratched a sigil onto a pub table and tried to explain to incredulous friends exactly what it's meant to do. And they think you're nuts. Especially when you get to the "wanking" bit. And then tell them some guy who writes comics told you how to do it.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
10:48 / 13.06.02
if you know what CBT stands for. (Both kinds.)
 
 
Elijah, Freelance Rabbi
11:10 / 13.06.02
if you go back and watch old favorite films like the sting or butch and sundance, and you cant help but think the male leads are totally fucking off camera...
 
 
Naked Flame
11:26 / 13.06.02
...you engage in magickal workings designed to change the world with people you've never met and maybe never will...

...you address your friends by fictional titles that they no longer use, but sometimes can't remember their real names...

...you will willingly hurtle down to the south coast in a cthonic rental van to make screamingly loud noise...

...if the 'Lith remains your homepage, even if you have nothing you want to say that year.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
15:05 / 13.06.02
...if Warren Ellis fed your cat acid and taught it to sing.
 
 
The Monkey
15:14 / 13.06.02
...if you don't even pause to be taken aback by statements involving ear-cock copulation
...your real-life friends still don't understand that when you scream "HUGGLES" and advance on them, it's, like, a good thing
 
 
gridley
17:11 / 13.06.02
...if your blog is about a fictional person.
 
 
Seth
17:22 / 13.06.02
...you feel kinda weird and under attack at your new job, and logically surmise that you're being rejected by the immune system of the corporate spirit (and quickly find a way to remedy the situation to everyone's satisfaction).
 
 
Saint Keggers
17:58 / 13.06.02
If you have participated in at least 15 "what kind of/which/who _____ are you?" quizzes. And espicially if you've spent time trying to figure out what answer combinations will give you which results.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
23:44 / 13.06.02
...if you'll willingly meet up with a bunch of strangers at the pub in order to discuss fatbeard ephemera, planks, anything ending in -ism, wanking and magic (sometimes concurrently).

...if you're nitpicky about society's fluff.

...if you can think. Or, failing that, if you can admit that you want to know how to.
 
 
Margin Walker
06:38 / 14.06.02
...you know what esperanto is and you want to learn how to speak it someday.
...you kinda like Radiohead, but wished it was "more fucked-up"
...you've been bald by choice for almost a decade.
...you know what a servitor is.
...you use the term "fictionsuit" on a weekly, if not daily, basis.
...your idea of a good time is summoning godheads.
...you can drink most people under the table and write a 30 page essay on semiotics at the same time.
...you know the differences between the two Warren Ellis' and can talk at lengh about both.
...you've scoured the web for theramin scematics.

OK, maybe the last one is just me....
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
07:38 / 14.06.02
....when you have evolved past petty human concerns, operate on a higher level and are desperate to communicate to everybody how incredibly cool this makes you, perhaps?
 
 
Elijah, Freelance Rabbi
12:18 / 14.06.02
...you start trying to come up with other witty phrases you can fit the word 'haus' into
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
12:22 / 14.06.02
you're a geek who's in denial about just how geeky they are, and has the lingo/aesthetic to window-dress it as some version of 'cool'?

or

when you engage in spiky nitpicking that generally doesn't, or only just about, makes reference to the topic in hand?
 
 
Bill Posters
12:24 / 14.06.02
You speak a different language to the civilian population, and have to suppress the urge to yell, "Woah, blip on my Knodgedar! Iggdy-plonk, fuckbake," when your grandmother makes a racist remark at sunday lunch?
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
12:40 / 14.06.02
You suppress that?

....when you want to lay the smackdown on the Interwebnet on people you want to huggle and schnoogle in a pub, and vice versa?
 
 
Bill Posters
12:44 / 14.06.02
Indeedy. Though I did once march through central London with a 'Spread the Huggles' placard.

Ahem.
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
15:28 / 14.06.02
When you hit refresh every five minutes even though it's a reeeeally slow day. And every other poster makes you feel faintly queasy.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
11:13 / 15.06.02
...you feel like destroying the world, Willow-stylee, and remaking it in your own image...

...clever people make you feel stupid, and stupid people make you feel clever...

...seven shades of shit happen to you, and you know that someone you've never met six thousand miles away will make you feel better about it...

...people tell you they're more comfortable referring to you by a name that isn't yours even though they know you as well as anyone can be expected to...

...you feel more comfortable referring to yourself by a name that isn't yours...

...you send your mates a text message saying "Flyboy's coming to my birthday party! Woo HOOOOOO!"...

...you feel like half of your best friends are fictional, and that half of them need a good hard spanking...

...the idea of lager and Red Bull reminds you of a cross between Hugh Grant and Tim Leary...

"Barbelith means never having to say you're sorry."

"That's the dumbest thing I ever heard."
 
 
Grey Area
11:52 / 15.06.02
...the Underground site going down at six on a Friday evening has you saying "Great, now what do I do...?" followed by a desperate trawl through an almost abandoned campus for people you can relate to face to face.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
00:31 / 16.06.02
...when you worry about whether your imaginary friends are still speaking to you cos you don't remember what happened when you met them...
 
 
SMS
01:16 / 16.06.02
...the Underground site going down at six on a Friday evening has you saying "Great, now what do I do...?" followed by a visit to Pocket Barbelith, where you keep hoping there might be some activity there. There isn't, so you sort of stare at the screen for a while.
 
 
SMS
01:28 / 16.06.02
...when you mention expressionless, haus, mordant c@rnival, etc., your friends know exactly what you're talking about. You're talking about that damned cult barbe-something and they know that's their cue to nod and smile.

...you feel a little nervous about the idea of meeting the Norse gods, and wonder if you might hit it off with them, but you know that Ganesh (the god) is pretty reliable.

...When talking to yourself, you specify which Ganesh.
 
 
SMS
03:04 / 16.06.02
...despite the fact that people seem to think you're intelligent, Knowledge really fucking irritates you.
 
 
Rage
21:39 / 16.06.02
-You're on some sort of "look how dark and intelligent my subtle jabs are" trip.
 
  
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