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Hey Mister Disco

 
 
YNH
05:05 / 10.05.02
Why the *sigh*?
 
 
Jackie Susann
07:27 / 10.05.02
Not to answer for Mr Disco or anything - and bearing in mind I have no idea what sigh you're talking about - he's got a bad cold. And gone home for the day, which I would have done too, if I had any sense.
 
 
YNH
07:41 / 10.05.02
Right then. Best wishes. *sigh* pops in briefly to post and disappears...

The sigh was in the Peer review thread.
 
 
_pin
09:27 / 10.05.02
Should people be wondering, Disco wrote "{YNH}: Ninja *sigh*"

Or, you know... something to that effect. I wasn't paying attention. I'm bored. Feed me now.
 
 
Disco is My Class War
08:58 / 11.05.02
sigh. i don't know, YNH, i've been sighing a lot lately. perhaps because you're obviously a ninja and you should be a pirate? i dunno, i were jestin', yr honour.

how ya been, anyhow, YNH?
 
 
Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo
14:36 / 11.05.02
And I thought this was a thread we could ask Mister Disco questions such as:

How to I get yellow anti-perperant stains out of my white polyester suit?

Or:

What is the best way to ask a redhead to boogie-oogie-oogie?
 
 
Trijhaos
14:37 / 11.05.02
What about

Is it possible to roller disco without roller skates?
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
16:47 / 11.05.02
It's the time of year for sighing. But enough of that! As someone who remembers 'Jack Fear Explains Everything' fondly, I think a Mr Disco's advice column is a great idea.

My question:

Dear Mister Disco, can you recommend any crimes which are victimless, profitable and easy to pull off with minimum risk of apprehension by the authorities?
 
 
Disco is My Class War
06:50 / 12.05.02
"How to I get yellow anti-perperant stains out of my white polyester suit?"

The word is 'anti-perspirant', pet. But the stain problem is of course quite simple. Merely soak in one parts water, one parts KY jelly and one parts ice-blue Toilet Duck for three days. When finished, wash in very hot water. With soap powder. Switch to a crystal deodorant as well -- they don't leave stains and they can also be used for scrying. Found at your local health food shop.

"What is the best way to ask a redhead to boogie-oogie-oogie?"

Do not wear a white polyester suit with stains under the arms.

"Is it possible to roller disco without roller skates?"

I've heard levitation roller disco is quite common in some of the higher realms of Xanadu, but these people do train for centuries. Don't think you can pick up their moves overnight.

"Dear Mister Disco, can you recommend any crimes which are victimless, profitable and easy to pull off with minimum risk of apprehension by the authorities?"

Yes. Art crime (ie anything yellow and made of metal or featuring a 15-metre-high glass staue of Britney Spears, in the style of Jeff Koons). Failing that, you could try stealing your housemate's CDs and selling them on.

More questions, anyone? Mister Disco is here to entertain...
 
 
Disco is My Class War
06:54 / 12.05.02
A quick note: this segues nicely with an idea I had in the Rosa years (oh, dear) to start the Grand Rosa Luxembourg Sex Advice Column, which would only be answered on my weblog. Sex advice questions are very welcome.
 
 
Margin Walker
01:52 / 13.05.02
More questions, anyone? Mister Disco is here to entertain...

OK, here goes....

Hey Mr. Disco, I can never seem to able to shave properly. I always have a couple of stray hairs or that little bit of shadow left over. What can I do to get a really good shave?

P.S. Speaking of shaving, summer is coming & I've been debating on if I should shave my armpits. If my guess is right, it might cut down on sweating during the muggy months. Is this a common habit amongst males or am I some freakish trendsetter? Moreover, would this create complications (like chaffing, itching, excess sweating, etc.)?
 
 
that
09:10 / 13.05.02
Hey Mister Disco,

If love is a drug, is it best to wean yourself off it slowly, or go cold turkey? Or just carry on in the hope it doesn't kill you too painfully?
 
 
YNH
17:17 / 13.05.02
The Rosa years (oh dear)

Sometimes it's been about like that... I do wonder how I became obviously a ninja. And I'm troubled by any interest in the conversation.
 
 
Cherry Bomb
00:42 / 14.05.02
Dear Mister Disco,

Can I call you Monsieur Disco?

Love,

"No my first name ain't baby, it's Cherry, Ms BOMB if you nas-tee"
 
 
Trijhaos
01:03 / 14.05.02
Dear Mister Disco,
I did a bad thing. I have blood on my hands and it won't come off. I've scrubbed and scrubbed, but while my hands are clean, I can still see and feel the blood. Blood runs like a river in my dreams; it haunts me. I cannot get away from it. What do I do?
 
 
Disco is My Class War
01:18 / 14.05.02
"Hey Mr. Disco, I can never seem to able to shave properly. I always have a couple of stray hairs or that little bit of shadow left over. What can I do to get a really good shave?"

Well now. Firstly you should always, always use a decent, expensive razor. Don't skimp and buy the no-name ones. Secondly, use good shaving cream. Thirdly, make sure your bathroom area has hot water and decent light, so you can see what you're doing. Fourthly, practice chi gong, wing chung or so that your razor-holding hand can move with the perfect combination of steady, calm intent. Sixthly, always use aftershave, which will guard against nasty ingrown hairs.

About the underarm shaving thing: You're obviously a freak, but so am I. If you want to shave your underarms, be my guest. It doesn't reduce the sweating, however, and neither does it necessarily reduce body odour.
 
 
Disco is My Class War
01:25 / 14.05.02
"If love is a drug, is it best to wean yourself off it slowly, or go cold turkey? Or just carry on in the hope it doesn't kill you too painfully?"

If you're going to mess around with love, my friend, it's better just to admit right at the start that you can't live without it, drug or not, and whatever it does to you will either a) make you crazy and fucked up, in which case you can write great novels like Kathy Acker, or b) turn you into a cynical bastard like William S. Burroughs, in which case you can also write great novels but may end up with a drinking problem or a heroin addiction. Embrace that. Always remember: love is just the thing that gets your creative juices flowing. If they're not flowing, get outta there. And always change the names of your characters so you won't get sued. It also helps to do a professional writing course.
 
 
Disco is My Class War
01:29 / 14.05.02
"Can I call you Monsieur Disco?"

Madame,

It is my greatest pleasure.

Le Disco
 
  
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