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Confessions of a Hair Farmer

23:50 / 04.05.02

So, my hair was growing long and fancy. Thick and healthy it hung down my back close to the half-way mark, the front being slightly longer than the back. I wore it up in a ponytail quite often, especially when I was eating food. It was nice hair, long hair, hair.

So today, after I showered and was drying this luxurious head of hair, I thought, "Fuck, it’s gonna' take all this long thick hair so long to dry. Maybe I should shave it off?"

So I flipped a coin, and the coin said, "Go for it." So I did.

I cut it all short, and then I spent the next hour or so shaving it right off and now I am bald. It is kinda' neat. I've never been bald before, but only had very short brush cuts (a couple of times). Anyway, it feels really neat, and is all tingly from the repeated drags of the razor across my scalp. I discovered that I have a pretty uniform skull without any strange bumps, groove, or divots. I was also surprised to find that there was no scar from when my brother had accidentally clocked me in the side of the head while we were throwing stones into the river. I lost so much blood that day...

Anyway, so now I have no hair, and I am quite content with following through on my whim. None of my pals can call me a hippie anymore, and now I can all call them "long haired hippy rioters."

Oh, and the air feels really nice on my smooth head. The only thing I don't like is, since I've been out in the sun a little over the last few weeks, there is a stark contrast between the colour in my face, and the whitey-white of my scalp. I guess that will change soon enough though.

Peace.

{0, 1, 2}

23:55 / 04.05.02

Nice and smooth.

{10, 23, 27}

00:01 / 05.05.02

Ah oui, mon frere!

"That's the way to do it see..."

nice and smooth...

(nice choice of numbers, btw.)

00:17 / 05.05.02

shout out from another farmer...my hair's only down past my shoulders, but i'm thinking about cutting it all off this summer. not shaving, been there done that, but maybe looking...respectible...
maybe not

00:20 / 05.05.02

I used to have shoulder-length hair, but I got tired of all the "You know, without your glasses, you look a lot like Jesus" comments so I cut it off.

00:25 / 05.05.02

i welcome the jesus comments, and will miss them when they're gone.

00:28 / 05.05.02

Geez-us! I used to get that often too, but so much in these last few years of hair farming. Back in high school, there was a small group of people who referred to me a "Jesus-man." Those were, contrary to what they'd like you to think, not the best years of my life, but certainly were some interesting and trying ones. Ah, the memories of Jesus-man, I walked on water once, but it was because that puddle was only an inch deep.

00:29 / 05.05.02

Jumpin' jesus on a pogostick! That is supposed to read:

"...but not so much in these last few years..."

The Knowledge

09:20 / 05.05.02

Been hair, done that…I am forced to shave my head once a fortnight because of a prematurely receding hairline. Balding-short is the only style I have left unfortunately, as ‘tis the only style left that makes me look good. I also found a groovy pair of black wraparound Oki sunglasses in my father’s house the other day, which I quickly took ownership of. It was weird because they were sitting in the attic gathering dust, amongst all these old books and things, like they were waiting for me to pick them up. Maybe Mother Nature is trying to turn me into King Mob? Oh, and how about you change your name to Mod Travis? (Shaving your hair off in a fit of craziness – Sheesh!)

(1 + 4 = 5)

09:27 / 05.05.02

mod3, that is very cool.

I had my hair cut recently, and was extremely pleased with the hairdresser's reaction ("Are you sure you want me to leave it like that? Um... okay. Well, I guess it makes a statement, anyway"), less so when I went to a party that night & a so-called friend told me, in complimenting manner, that it was "fashionable" and "feminine".

Grrr.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

10:56 / 05.05.02

I need to shave my head again. I've not done it for almost a week. Being freshly baldied always fills me with confidence. I kind of miss my old mowie sometimes, but I've never looked better than I do bald.

11:00 / 05.05.02

I normally have it quite short anyway, but I number-one'd myself last weekend and I'm quite pleased with how it looks.

I've only ever had it all shaved off, properly, with a razor, once and I ended up covered with so many scabs and scars that I decided not to try it again. It was done by an ex of mine with blunt Ladyshave, though. I might be able to do better now.

It was cold, though. I need to buy a hat. One with a pom-pom on top.

01:45 / 07.05.02

Not so much a fit of craziness, Tann, but rather a moment of clarity and absolute decisiveness. I am still very happy with the result, love the feeling, and I get the biggest grin every time I catch sight of my reflection (proving that I am not a vampire).

Yarr, MC! It does give a kind of confidence, don't it!

Ah, fridgemagnety-goodness, I did not bleed very much. Only in a couple of spots, and certainly no more than any time I've shaved any other parts of my body. I imagine the blunt disposable had much to do with your bloody experience! I used one of them fancy Mach III razor (yeah, yeah, I know Gillette sucks, but that razor sure doesn't!). I fully endorse any razor that has 3 sharp blades. These Mach III things really leave you smooth and fresh, and for a couple days yet!

The responses from my friends and acquaintances have been mixed (surprise, indifference, shock, disbelief, etc.). The funniest ones are those who think that I am "brave" or something like that for doing it. It wasn't like that at all! I merely made a choice, and then followed it through. What is brave are the chemotherapy victims who have no choice to make about becoming bald: that is as courageous as it comes, I'd imagine.

m3

02:56 / 31.08.02

I had the same flat top for years, then a shaved head for years. I liked the shaved head for the same breeziness that Mod mentioned. Then I just let it go, and go, and go...now it's way past my shoulders and usually gets in the way if it's not back in that crazy ponytail. My excuse was that I was going to chop it for Wigs For Kids, but now my girlfriend wants me to keep it all.

Let me tell you something, some lucky kid is getting some thick ol' greezy black chunk of hair doo soon, very soon.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

09:48 / 31.08.02

I used to have dreads I could SIT on... (which made arse-wiping require slightly more concentration than for normal folks)... then when I shaved it off, the first time I saw my mum a few weeks afterwards, she was all like "Oh, you look so much better without all that hair, dear... what's that dent in the back of your head?"

Not wishing to say "oh, mum, that was a friendly-fire brick injury sustained during a riot", I had to think quickly. Fortunately, my childhood was full of head-smashing accidents (none of them, I hasten to add, my mum's fault... I was just one clumsy bastard), so I picked one at random, at which my mum regaled me with an amusing anecdote about it which I only vaguely remembered.

I've just been informed by my hairdresser flatmate that she and another hairdresser friend of mine want to do my hair on Tuesday... IN PROPER PINK & WHITE BAGPUSS STRIPES!

Marvellous.