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Rebel without a clue...

 
 
Tezcatlipoca
14:52 / 24.04.02
I've noticed a rather worrying trend in my behaviour of late, in as much as I've become increasingly - and totally unnecessarily - verbally aggressive towards people who irritate me. Normally I'm a fairly stoic sort of chap, but just lately I seem to have a massive amount of furious energy which has erupted once or twice, and brought a few people to tears because of things I've said to them (all of whom have been apologised to later, I hasten to add).

Now under normal circumstances, I'd attribute such things to stress - and take the necessary course of action accordingly. My concern is that I can't actually think of a single identifiable reason for this aggression, as everything in life is going well.

Have/do any of you guys experienced similar periods of apparently pointless aggression, and, if so, how did/do you overcome it?
 
 
w1rebaby
15:34 / 24.04.02
Now under normal circumstances, I'd attribute such things to stress - and take the necessary course of action accordingly. My concern is that I can't actually think of a single identifiable reason for this aggression, as everything in life is going well.

I've done this sort of thing in the past too, and I have to say that it's most likely to be stress. If it's bad enough to affect how you behave like that, it's bad enough to warp your perceptions of it. You can sublimate it and consciously ignore it so you think you're fine, but are objectively behaving very strangely.

I find it's usually pretty obvious to those around me, though utter opaque to me myself. Try asking one of your closer friends... "I know this is a funny question, but do you think I'm stressed? Is there anything you think I need to relax about?" etc.

hard to say not knowing you, having met you and over the net...
 
 
drzener
15:45 / 24.04.02
Done it myself. I let it build up over the course of a year. Everything came to a head. I used to deal with things by drinking far too much. Experienced loads of blackouts due to alcohol.
Culminated in me splitting up with my girlfriend of four years - who I adored. Broke my fucking heart.
I moved out of the country and away from everyone I knew for a year. Made loads of new friends and became obsessive about making music/tekno. That kept me on the level.
I don't think I've ever felt right since but at least I have some self-control now and a strong sense of personal responsiility.
I don't have any advice but I have to warn you that these things can really get out of hand and I lost the most important thing to me in life at that time. There is no way to undo the damage you can do with your relationships with others.
I wish I had some idea of what the fuck was going on at the time. Hindsight may bring clarity but after the fact that is no good.
Please don't take this as self-obsessed whining - I am just sharing my own experiences and this is something close to my heart.
 
 
drzener
15:46 / 24.04.02
I also think that stress is no excuse for being a prick.
 
 
bitchiekittie
16:12 / 24.04.02
...and here I thought it was my best excuse
 
  
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