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Buttering a cat

14:13 / 10.04.02

Had friends over at the weekend and, all being cat-lovers, started talking about the potential hassles ZoCher and I are likely to face when he eventually moves to London with our two cats - given that part of my (cheap for Willesden Green) rent agreement is that I look after my landlady's four cats while she's off in Botswana.

Someone mentioned the old advice of buttering one's cat's paws - the reasoning (I think) being that the feline concerned then spends hours/days sitting around licking the butter off and, in the process, familiarises itself with its new surroundings (rather than buggering off through the nearest catflap).

I'm curious: has anyone ever actually done this? Do you know anyone who has? I'm a little dubious that a) it sounds mildly cruel to the cat concerned, and b) would result in rancid grease-stains over all and sundry.

14:22 / 10.04.02

From: "Ask Dr Fox", the website of Dr Michael W Fox, of Michigan Pet Net:

Question: When Sadie was a kitten we lived in a ranching community, and she ran around outside during the day and came in at night. When she was a
year old we moved to a city, and she lived indoors all the time, because we
lived on a busy street.

Recently, we moved into a very small town with large yards, but no
fences. We've taken Sadie outside on a harness and she just loves being
outdoors. I'm reluctant to let her out for fear of dogs coming into our yard;
she would have no place to run from them.

My daughter was told that if you put peanut butter on a cat's paws, she
will lick it off and get the scent of the area and then not try to find her way
back to her previous home. Have you heard of this? Do you recommend
that we try to make her an outdoor cat after five years of living indoors?

Dr Fox reckons: Forget the peanut butter. It's just as likely to confuse her as to help her
get the scent of a new area. Most cats will naturally take precautions in a
new place so that they don't get disoriented from home base. Some cats
may get spooked and run off, though; that's why it's a good idea to walk
the cat on a harness and leash around a new environment. Consider
putting up a little "cat house" for her, or an enclosed gazebo, a sun porch,
or large outdoor pen.

I used to advise people to keep their cats inside the new home for seven
to 10 days so that they could get used to the new place before being let
out. But now I'm opposed to letting cats outdoors, where they run the risk
of disease and injury. Why would you want to let your cat out after five
years of being accustomed to indoor living?

More info: http://detnews.com/metro/hobbies/petnet/drfox/

(Sorry, can't html)

14:22 / 10.04.02

That's clearly not going to work.
What you do is you build a replica of your old place and electrify all the surfaces and places the cats liked to sit. They'll be traumatised into accepting the new place, reasoning that they're better off.

14:24 / 10.04.02

Hmm, Dr Fox certainly seems more of an authority on cat-buttering than on Pop Idols...

ONLY NICE THINGS

15:05 / 10.04.02

My God. This is why I hate domestic animals. They are so....fucking...stupid.

If the cat isn't bright enough to stick close to the people who feed it, then screw it. Let it go and get a rat. They're intelligent, affectionate and much cuter.

15:08 / 10.04.02

When we moved to Southsea our cats were kept indoors for a week; when we let them out they did go for a bit of a wander, but found their way back eventually (after about twelve hours IIRC). It probably helps if there are lots of other cats around - should keep them from straying too far...

15:23 / 10.04.02

My flat mate reckons you don't need to bother with any of this paws-buttering bollocks. Keep the cat indoors for 3 or 4 days, feed it and it'll get acclimatised to the new home.
I've heard stories of displaced cats finding their way across miles of land to get to old homes- not sure if there's any truth in this. In any event, Willesden to Edinburgh is probably pushing it.
Our cat was moved from a home nearby to ours and it never made an attempt to head back to the old place - mind you, it's an utterly inactive lump of a feline

pointless and uncalled for

15:25 / 10.04.02

Does Zocher have a homing cat?

16:14 / 10.04.02

One homing cat: the very intelligent one who will be the Queen of the London feline underworld within days, with all the neighbourhood toms licked into shape and bringing her ornamental fish for tea from the neighbours' ponds. Willesden rodents will be paying her protection money.

We nearly had to cancel our last house move at the last minute when she disappeared but she came back in the nick of time after five days away, having done the Edinburgh Festival and been to London to visit the Queen.

The problem will be our beloved, brainless, singing cat. He is so confused by life in general and frightened of everything that moves that he would panic. But we would probably hear him singing to keep his spirits up from quite a distance.

16:17 / 10.04.02

haus is right, rats do make quite nice pets

Id like to help, but all my cats have been indoor cats. eliminates LOTS of problems

19:23 / 10.04.02

Totally off topic, Ganesh, but if you want to hook up your landlady while she's in Botswana, I've got an uncle who, when not writing books, leads photo safaris there. And is, like, really good. And stuff.
Have no idea what the things cost (even with the "grant sent me" discount), but there it is.

02:10 / 11.04.02

Industrial strength glue works much better, really it does, really, it does. You'll be surprised, try it.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

03:18 / 11.04.02

Cats? Glass'em, I say. Glass'em all. It's the only language they onderstand.

No, actually, I have few tips. First: Get tranks off the vet, and use them.

Make sure the cats have plenty of toys/rugs/snugglies that will reassure them. Familiar stuff, y'know?

Snacks, toys and strokies. Go for major cat spoilage. Remember: catnip is an addictive drug for kitty, so give hir as much as you can find.

05:22 / 11.04.02

When I moved house last year, I simply did keep the cats indoors for about a week, then accompanied them outside a couple of times, then left them to it. Apart from a startling propensity to climb up a fire escape on a factory behind the house and look like they're about to pounce on birds 60 ft below, they've been pretty good at not getting lost.

But then, I am their Daddy. And they love me.

11:28 / 11.04.02

Ganesh, I've always had cats and agree with K-CC, Meme and Sax. Keeping them inside for the first few days when you move always does the trick. You know how they like to put their 'mark' on things, by sniffing around to check them out, rubbing up against door frames, furniture and so on. Once this has happened, they seem to be acclimatised to the fact that this is where *you* and *they* now belong, and so they come back after their sorties outside to establish their territory there.

Incidentally, Desmond Norris ( Catwatching ) argues that cats possess an extraordinary sensitivity to the earth's magnetic field and that this is what enables them to find their way home without familiar visual cues. He reckons that cases of cats travelling hundreds of miles over a period of weeks to go back to an old home are not to be scoffed at.

11:38 / 11.04.02

How will the two lovely ZoNesh Edinburgh cats get on with the four city-hardened lost boys you've got to temporarily adopt?

11:42 / 11.04.02

This, it is fair to say, may well be an Issue...

12:17 / 11.04.02

Yes, Sax, that *is* a worry. Coping with one or two other cats would seem manageable. But four ... oh dear. Can you keep them in separate areas and introduce them to each other gradually, perhaps?

13:11 / 11.04.02

Cats always respond to meat. Keep it indoors for a wekk, then let it out for about five minutes before waving half a tonne of cooked chicken or ham around. They'll soon come back. Continue process, but bring the meat out (ahem) after longer and longer periods. After a couple of weeks they'll be immersed into their new environmant.

15:23 / 11.04.02

I thought this was going to be about the old "buttered toast/cat" perpetual motion engine. How pleased I was...