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Japanese misunderstandings, misspellings & malaprops

Make sexy and healthy impression to us! http://www.engrish.com! Making you feel Nice and Happy!

At least the Engrish.com had some semblance of maybe making sense. However, this makes no sense whatsoever. In fact, can anybody here even figure out what the hell the Japanese "Hi-Ho!" commercial is even trying to sell?!?!