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Portable music

17:23 / 08.04.02

Had an old friend (who's a bit of a social bulldozer) round at the weekend. Jolly time, chatting with her and other friends, listening to the ZoCher playlist as a handsome and mellifluous backdrop to the shenanigans.

Then, as will inevitably happen with this particular friend, she mentioned the latest bit of music she was taken with and out comes the cd from her bag. So we put on the track she's currently obsessing over (Nickleback, can't remember title) and it was ok. Conversation dutifully stops as we all admire her discerning taste in Grunge-a-like. Better than last time, I suppose, when we had to listen to a Native American sweat-lodge medley.

Then back to the expert knob-twiddling of dj Ganesh as soundtrack to the evening. But ol' Grumpy Knickers has a face on her and makes some begrudging remarks about all the other good tracks on the cd we didn't play. So we played more, interspersed through the evening.

I am, admittedly, a grumpy old fucker but it struck me then as a very controlling thing to do. Maybe it's quite normal to travel round with a selection of your favourite cd's in a tote bag.

17:35 / 08.04.02

Well, speaking on behalf of the musically-obsessed, I do tend to travel with a bag full of my favorite cds. Now there is something to be said for etiquette, here.

Basically what I do is sort of try and "sneak" my CD on, usually with a comment like, "Hey, Blair, I just downloaded this song that I think you'll like..." and then put in the CD and see how much air time I can get away with. But my friends are aware than I am a music tyrant, and usually we all know that I'm up against the "how soon 'til they get sick of this?" clock when I pop something in. I am a benevolent dictator in this regard.

That said it also common courtesy that the guest, no matter how musically obsessed, must always acquiesce to the musical tastes of the host, even if the host has really awful music taste and thinks, say, the "comeback" album by Fleetwood Mac was good.

So two problems I see here:

1. Your friend was just rude.
2. She was rude in order to play you some Nickelback.

I smell issues...

18:07 / 08.04.02

I think a good rule of thumb is to always let the hosts select the music. However, when I have had one over the eight I often stage a hostile takeover of the stereo in (good) friends' homes and play exactly what I want them to hear. It usually fits the mood and is a fair compromise, I think.

18:11 / 08.04.02

Well, living by a double-standard, I rule the musical selections at gatherings I host. However, I know my party is officially raging out of control when I completely lose control of the stereo and drunken guests start raiding my CDs and playing what they fancy. This is OK.

18:16 / 08.04.02

I tend to think it's a good party if the host looses control of the musical selection. If it's just a small gathering, however, it should be left to the hosts. (unless I've found a *really* great new track

)

18:21 / 08.04.02

You should invite me to your next party, Chezza.

18:30 / 08.04.02

I am forever burning people cds they *ought to hear*, or lending people favourite albums of mine...(and I am invariably bemused or wounded when they don't like/don't care one way or another about 'em)...but music has such unpredictable and variable effects from person to person that I very rarely like to make musical choices when I'm round at other people's places. Like if I piss someone off with my musical taste when they're round here, it is somehow more acceptable? Dunno (however, if I know someone is really freaked out by a certain band/musician, I won't play 'em within their hearing, which I think is just good manners).

But I love getting to listen to other people's favourite music anyway - tis a cheap way to widen one's musical horizons...

Just as an aside, I can't imagine why anyone would think Nickleback were essential listening...

18:33 / 08.04.02

Anyone want a copy of my Nickleback CD?

I'm terrible like this, I wouldn't take CD's with me I think, but if I'm playing music I keep flipping through tracks trying to get people to listen to them, I know it must be really annoying - I need help...

Taking it to another extreme, someone I used to work with used to have parties where him and all his friends would take their hard drives round with them, with gigs and gigs of music

18:57 / 08.04.02

No need to be embarrassed about it. I carry a CD wallet around with me most of the time, usually so that I can listen to stuff I like but it comes in useful at social gatherings too.

I routinely comandeer the stereo at parties for the simple reason that I have much better music taste than anyone else in the entire world, particularly when I am drunk. Why hide it?

19:23 / 08.04.02

I prefer to share, host or guest

20:22 / 08.04.02

Perceptive Cherry Bomb (I smell issues... Stop sneaking about in my head!) - she is an old (prehistoric) girlfriend, which does complicate the issue. But no Fleetwood Mac in this house ever (well, maybe Oh Well, Part II and Green Manalishi but those are so-o-o old now none of you will have heard of them).

I don't mind at all when the cd player is hi-jacked at a debauched house party (although you'd have to gag and bind Lord Ganesh first since, like you, fridgemagnet, he has much better music taste than anyone else in the entire world, particularly when drunk).

Although, in view of previous visits from the constabulary, I get anxious when the volume pounds in the quiet hours pre-dawn.

In my head this was just a few friends coming round to dinner and staying till 4 a.m. so I suppose I am just a grumpy fucker. If somebody said "Have you got any ..." I'd happily oblige with that or something close but there is an etiquette issue here. It was such derivative grunge (I thought, on first acquaintance) and I have far better examples. But Ganesh wouldn't comply, a true music tyrant! Wasn't like I was foisting Britten's 'Cello Music on them.

I think there's an implied criticism in this behaviour of the host's ability (i.e. mine - as if!) to provide an appropriate ambience. Maybe that was what niggled me. She'll start bringing her own food with her soon. She was snotty about that too. And we had to start putting the lights off to get her to go home...

Cholister's right about music having such unpredictable and variable effects from person to person but there are times when nobody's listening consciously to the music, yet you're controlling the mood with some judicious tracks, which is your job as host, and then there are times when everybody's so pissed or stoned they need throbbing bass stimulation or gentle chill out headfood.

If you're popping round here Bear, you feel free to bring your whole Nickleback collection with you. You won't be able to hear it, though, from the dungeon, where the bears usually go...

I am a D.J., I am what I play
I got believers (kiss-kiss)
Believing me, oh

The Return Of Rothkoid

11:51 / 09.04.02

Zocher: wot, no "Tusk"? That rocked, even when I was in nappies.

I tend to not put my musical force to work if I'm out at someone's for dinner. I do carry a stack of CDs with me, 'cos I can't stand not having my own music at work: so weekdays means I've a bulging bag, and am likely to want to tell people about something that I'm really excited about. However, this is likely going to go no further than digging out the disc, saying "this is really cool!" and putting it away again; I do think it's kinda rude to bring-your-own in terms of invitations - though if the host wants you to, that's another story. Cholister's post covers most of this ground, though - I feel largely the same.

In my place, however, I'm quite likely to bore people shitless by saying "y'gotta hear this!" and playing bits and pieces of stuff. If I'm kept busy cooking, however, this goes waaay down.

Oh, and Britten's cello music rocks. Especially this disc.

13:18 / 09.04.02

Yes, Tusk, such a dark rhythm to it, but only that one track from the album, Rothkoid. & nothing which poured from the emetic maw of Fleetwood Mac thereafter. Sadly, I think I was at University and not in my nappies when it came out and I bought the 7" vinyl version.

& Britten's marvellous Cello Music, begorrah! Emboldened by the stroppy houseguests responding to this thread, I shall henceforward set out with a selection of ol' Benj in my backpack with which to tyrannise future hosts.

13:33 / 09.04.02

...music's a very important component between me and the crew I'm with. We're always swapping, suggesting, etc. A very big background to work and other things. Fortunately we all tend to give most things a listen but shy away from things too trite. When it comes to strangers though, I have to say that I don't recommend music to them unless I have an idea of what page they're on. If they ask, I generally pull from a list that they've never heard from. But occassionally the said stranger might have heard of them and good conversation insues. I'm mostly a music snob in most cases though...

13:43 / 09.04.02

I'm rarely without at least a few tapes on my person. I don't tend to push them on people, unless I already share a certain amount of musical agreement with said people, in which case they're fair game.

If someone puts something really shit (eg. nickleback) on, I do tend to speak my mind, but add "of course, I like all kinds of weird, scary music that everyone else hates and am probably an elitest - don't let me put you off" before they can get offended.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

13:50 / 09.04.02

Got a CD burner with my new computer, now i can burn my own CD. Hah hah hah!

16:44 / 09.04.02

I'm currently trying to get my hands on a Zocher's-prehistoric-ex burner...

17:00 / 09.04.02

Restrictions on the Fleetwood Mac, Zocher? You do have issues...

Things get even more complicated when you're cohosting a party with your roommates. At a few gatherings we had, my former roommate would spend the entire night intently playing obscure MP3s. Nothing really wrong with that, and I don't have enough taste or interest in music to make a judgement call, but as co-host I could tell that alot of our guests were getting restless. Most all of them could be found on the front lawn.

After much pleading, I could usually get my roommate to play some danceable songs. This only ever lasted for ten minutes tops, during which time the house would fill again. Then, whammo, we'd start hearing the other tunes again and everyone would make their way outside.

So, in a situation like this, is mutiny an option?

The Return Of Rothkoid

18:26 / 09.04.02

I think so. Either that, or get a big-ass magnet mounted on your wall in a break-glass case. That way, if it ends up being an issue, you can just say "Don't make me break the glass!" - the threat of demagnetising the HD with all the MP3s will probably be enough to bend them to your will.

18:53 / 09.04.02

I never leave home without an acoustic guitar, so if things ever get tedious at a gathering, I can perform an impromptu solo concert. It always goes over really well, actually. If I'm drunk enough, I will take requests.

20:31 / 09.04.02

Zocher: (well, maybe Oh Well, Part II and Green Manalishi but those are so-o-o old now none of you will have heard of them).

Da-duh-da,
da-da-DUM
da-da-DUM
da-da-na da-duh-da!

Peter Green was a fucking genius.

Can't help about the shape I'm in,
I can't sing, I ain't pretty and my legs are thin...
But don't ask me what I think of you
I might not
give the answer
that you want
me
to....

On Tusk... don't read this. No, really. Elsewhere on the site, they've got real audio and (gulp) midi files for old Fleetwood Mac songs.

On soundtracking: it's OK to get friends to listen to one song, but anything else is gonna be background music at best, and an intrusion at worst. Spankings to follow. Or musical retribution. Grunge-a-like to be matched by Pet Shop Boys. Or, of course, the Green Manalishi.
(Da-duh-DA, DAT-DAT-DAA DAT-DAT-DAA, ta-da-dum-da-dat-daa!)

20:33 / 09.04.02

Moriarty: boombox on the lawn.

21:19 / 09.04.02

Yes, Peter Green was a genius until the schizophrenia and the gardening kicked in. That bloody Stevie Nicks in her silly 70's shoes and Laura Ashley dresses, that's where it all went wrong.

I am usually quite a tolerant person on the grounds (as Cholister said) that the consequent acquaintance with new music could be a life enhancing thing. Which is why I visit other people's houses and listen to their music there. Perhaps I should be consistent and go down the Sax route of staging a hostile takeover and insisting on the kind of quality music which only I am tasteful enough to discern. Ha!

Ganesh and I have been known to object though to people playing cd's of our own which we had gone off to the point where we have have thrown them out into the canal at the back in mid-party. The cd's, not the people (yet).

22:00 / 09.04.02

In the last couple of months, I've found 2 albums that I loved to no end and kept trying to get others to listen to them, but to no avail. If people aren't interested, they won't pay attention goddamn it...

"You have to hear this!"
"nah..."
"hmmmm..."

02:04 / 10.04.02

Inside scoop on the Stevie Nicks/Chrissie McVie incarnation of Fleetwood Mac: They hated each other by the time the White Album was done. They prayed Rumours would be a flop. It wasn't - and they persevered for the tour. There's a moral there, somewhere.

So, I gotta ask. How do you and Ganapati handle car radio control - especially on long trips?

11:56 / 10.04.02

car radio wars avoided by the simple expedient of being car-free eco-warriors, grant...

14:33 / 10.04.02

I did actually make an on-the-spot decision once to see to it that a party guest NEVER came back to my house or my parties when he actually unplugged my stereo because he didn't like the music that was on. "How DARE he?!?" I thought at the time.

And let it be said, this guy was in fact a complete asshole who is now happily out of the life of my friend who was dating him at the time.

So you see, deciding to socially banish someone based on the fact that they unplugged your stereo is quite a good move. And also a fine illustration of just how obnoxious I can be when it comes to music.

By the way rock on to Zocher and Ganesh for being car-free! I'm on my fifth year of being car-free and I love it! Viva las bikes!