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I, Movie - continued!

 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:01 / 18.06.01
The original thread, more or less:

I, Movie
[Your Name Here]: Since a couple of you nice and beautiful people found this bit from Jack Fear's "Title Bout" thread interesting, I present to all the basic plot structure of "I."

quote:Kathleen Hannah plays Kathy Acker, back from the dead, carrying a harpoon and wearing pages of Dickens, DeSade, and Artaud hunts a mysterious hooded figure. Charleton Heston plays Papa Hemmingway, also dead, who can't speak because of that terrible headwound (and hence the hood). His cold dead fingers tightly grip the shotgun. An ensemble cast plays various other literary figures: RuPaul as Lacan provides clues about Ernest's location. In a wonderful scene, Lacan emerges fully formed from Acker's cunt while she sleeps, and writes the word 'white' in blood on her newsprint clothes. Upon waking, she folds a pointy hat from her own tatooed skin and stalks Hemminway through the collective unconscious, finally catching up to him on an iceberg. The harpoon, once fired strikes her from the back, poking out her "I."

Obviously, I'm a few figures shy of an ensemble cast. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to help me fill in some blanks. The only rules I'd like to keep in place are:
1) That the figures must be literary critics or authors - in both cases fairly recognizable.
2) You must place them in context, in the movie.
3) I wrote the original with some sense of why I wanted certain individuals representing Acker, Hemmingway, and Lacan. When casting, try to follow that example.
4) Actors must be living. Literary figures obviously need not be.
5) fnord

People I'd like to see, but don't understand well enough yet to cast myself: Ishmael Reid, Euridice, Ibsen. Oh, and Faulkner's mine. Go to if you like. If not, stop back for further installments.

Cranky Jackie Sour Pants : I will write a bit of this later, but right now I have to ask: Why is Lacan Ru Paul?

[Your Name Here]: Fair Enough. I'll own that this was inspiration based a little bit on testimonial. Despite Jack's hilarious "Lacan Wore Khakis" post the man was a bit eccentric. I figured Ru Paul would look good in full length fur. There's also a bit of irony inherent in a transgendered black individual playing a white post-Freudian. Rupaul in mink walking across a certain desert had some charm as well. The images of both persons were resonant for Acker's writing and life. And I was trying to come up with a figure that would be fairly threatening to both Heston and Hemmingway. Feel free to tell me I'm full of shit.

zzzzenith: I think we should have James Woods playing William Burroughs in it as the love interest. Hemmingway's love interest.

Whisky Priestess: Jeff Goldblum/Danny DeVito as Sigmund Freud?

[Your Name Here]: Play nice, now... put them in the movie.

revolution.org: Okay: I'd like kd lang playing RD Laing, who enters the frame at random moments playing with a length of rope tied up in various different knots, muttering to himself. One of Acker's dream sequences would feature Laing and Lacan in a terribly glitzy but somehow wrong advertisement for MAC, both of them wearing spectacles of course. And Foucault must make an appearance, played by Hillary Swank.

todd: Macauley Culkin plays a young James Joyce, periodically wiping his brow with a pair of Nora Barnacle's soiled panties and making his "Home Alone" face of mock surprise. Ezra Pound, played by the comedian Carrot Top, snorts dismissively from his death-cell.

Rizla B. Goode: I think the film should feature narration by Albert Camus (as played by John Lithgow) telling a longwinded anecdote in a dream of his own funeral.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:07 / 18.06.01
Kevin Spacey plays Tennessee Williams, whose ghost follows Hemmingway around making mildly annoying and patronising gags at his expense. He is accompanied by Stepehn Merritt as an ethereal F. Scott Fitzgerald, who provides the comic relief by getting drunk and falling down a lot. Whenever Acker or one of Papa's other nemeses appear on the horizon, Tennessee shrieks in fright and F. Scott hiccups.
 
 
ynh
00:26 / 19.06.01
[boring curmudgeon] Why should person X play figure Y? What use is a series of comedic gags when you provide no grounding for them? Who is Stephen Merrit?[/boring curmudgeon]

In any case it sounds more like Stephen Merrit should play Dean Martin playing F. Scott Fitzgerald and that Mr Fitzgeral should descend fro heaven with a halo and then do his schtick.
 
 
Jackie Susann
02:42 / 19.06.01
I'd like to see a shadowy CGI graphic version of Maurice Blachot mud-wrestling Bataille, as played by the WWF's HHH. Francois Ozon directs.
 
 
ynh
05:50 / 19.06.01
Can we have Blanchot be Acker's cancer as well? Did you see this as part of the above film, and if so where within it?
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
05:50 / 19.06.01
quote:Originally posted by [Your Name Here]:
[boring curmudgeon] Why should person X play figure Y? What use is a series of comedic gags when you provide no grounding for them? Who is Stephen Merrit?[/boring curmudgeon]


"Thank you, Zenith, for saving my obscure thread from eternal oblivion!"

"You're welcome, [Your Name Here]..."

Oh, and:

Kevin Spacey was born to play Tennessee Williams almost as much as he was born to play Lex Luthor.

Stephen Merritt = Magnetic Fields mainman. Has the necessary louche. Or I could be just talking crap.

The idea of Fitzgerald as a comedy pisshead appeals to my morbid sense of humour.

[ 19-06-2001: Message edited by: Zenith ]
 
 
rizla mission
12:40 / 19.06.01
The crudely re-animated corpse of Frazer from Dad's Army plays Raymond Chandler, who watches the drama unfold from a distance, making notes for his next book, which is never finished..
 
 
ynh
00:38 / 20.06.01
Thank you, Zenith, for saving my obscure thread from /(eternal)/ oblivion.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
07:48 / 20.06.01
You're welcome, [YNH].

In a piece of dream casting, Jon Favreau plays Bret Easton Ellis, hired by the shadowy forces of literary authority known only as 'The Canon' to take out Acker before she gets to Papa Hem. Ellis wears a houndstooth-check Georgio Armani suit, Louis Vutton patent leather shoes, a white silk Oswald Boateng shirt, a paisley tie, and Raymond Carver's scrotum as a hat. As he tracks Acker across the wastelands he describes everything he sees and does in a repetitive, detached and strangely unsettling monotone into a small dictaphone, occasionally pausing to eat a vol au vent, question his sexuality, or snort cocaine off his valet Jay McInerny's arse.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
07:49 / 20.06.01
Note: Jay McInerny played by Mel Gibson in a gimp suit. Not allowed to speak or use a pen or typewriter at any time.

[ 20-06-2001: Message edited by: Zenith ]
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
07:49 / 20.06.01
quote:Originally posted by Zenith:
Kevin Spacey was born to play Tennessee Williams almost as much as he was born to play Lex Luthor.


Fucking right.
 
 
grant
12:09 / 20.06.01
Act Two is dominated by the figure of Ishmael Reed, played by a tattooed and ornamentally scarred Laurence Fishburne.
His only line, which he repeats often and with great menace, is "Call me Queequeg!"
He is constantly interrupted by his friends, who pop up onscreen, saying things like, "Call it off, Ishmael. What's gotten into you? Is this one of those Masonic things we're not supposed to know about?"
His climactic scene takes place at the second plot point, when he attempts to pull the harpoon from Acker's grasp to spear a New York subway train as it pulls into the station. In the struggle, he cuts off both his hands and falls onto the tracks.
A curious onlooker, played by Angela Davis, looks down under the train and says, "W.E. DuBois, thus thou art avenged..." then turns on Acker, hissing, "...white BITCH!"
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
13:50 / 20.06.01
Harold Bloom (played by Christopher Walken) is seen in many cut-scenes, watching a monitor that relays the progress of the rest of the movie's characters. He's ensconced in a comfy leather chair, stroking a white cat that's in his lap. Initially, all we see is a signet ring, while he calls particular and tells them that the Western branch of CANON needs their obesience...or else it's The Stack for them...
 
 
ynh
15:58 / 20.06.01
Thank-you, grant. Is Angela Davis playing herself? I can't let this slip into walk on cameos and sacrafice the inter/intratext.

And who are Ishmael's friends?
 
 
Tom Coates
14:06 / 21.06.01
test
 
 
grant
15:43 / 21.06.01
quote:Originally posted by [Your Name Here]:
Thank-you, grant. Is Angela Davis playing herself? I can't let this slip into walk on cameos and sacrafice the inter/intratext.

And who are Ishmael's friends?


Angela Davis would be the ideal person to play the part, yes.
The part she is playing, however, does not need to explicitly be that of "An-gela Davis," simply a subway bystander.

If Angela Davis can't be obtained, the part could just as easily go to Henry Louis Gates, Jr., as played by James Earl Jones, wearing Darth Vader's cape and a formal suit vaguely reminiscent of a military uniform. He's holding a crudely-carved witch-doctor staff strung with beads and animal hair.
Substitute the word "BITCH" with "DEVIL", and you're golden.

Ishmael's friends? They could be literary figures, but more likely they'd sim-ply be bit players, other characters or faceless formal devices. You could even use puppets with funny names, like "Mar-regret O'Pression," written on index cards worn around their necks.

But we wouldn't want to get ridiculous.
 
 
ynh
01:04 / 22.06.01
I'm really spacing, I think. I know there's an author who likes to pop into his texts to give commentary - not that this is particularly new, but he does it with some frequency. (Michael Ondaatje?) I think this is why I asked about "Ishmael's friends." Do you know who his influences are?

I was thinking at leat one of the friends could be John Edgar Wideman as played by (this may change) Samuel L. Jackson, wearing a sweater that has the name of every award he's received woven into it. Relaxed posture, delivering the line you mentioned.

A scene with Gunter Grass played by Glen Danzig (though this approaches ridiculous) and Salman Rushdie played by John Lovitz telling a story alternately to one another and to a wall, that eventuall degenerates into a complete farce... in fact perhaps this should be the openning scene.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
08:15 / 22.06.01
quote:Originally posted by [Your Name Here]:
I know there's an author who likes to pop into his texts to give commentary - not that this is particularly new, but he does it with some frequency.


Milan Kundera? If you have him in the film he must be played by Ian Holm. I think in a completely unexplained and unrelated scene we see too young lovers* copulating on a bare mattress in a sparsely furnished room in an oppressive Eastern European country. Kundera/Holm sits watching them, offering a running commentary on their technique and what it says about politics, nationalism and art in the 20th century.

*possibly Dave Eggers and Zadie Smith as played by a couple of hot new unknowns.
 
 
grant
12:50 / 22.06.01
quote:Originally posted by [Your Name Here]:
I think this is why I asked about "Ishmael's friends." Do you know who his influences are?


Well, Kurt Vonnegut does the "Hi, I'm the author!" bit with some regularity.

He would probably be ranked up there among Reed's influences (bearing in mind I've only read Mumbo Jumbo, that is).
Pynchon and Robert Anton Wilson probably would too, and so would a lot of jazz musicians and most likely Ralph Ellison (Invisible Man).


quote:
I was thinking at leat one of the friends could be John Edgar Wideman as played by (this may change) Samuel L. Jackson, wearing a sweater that has the name of every award he's received woven into it. Relaxed posture, delivering the line you mentioned.


Not that familiar with Wideman, but it'd be fun to see Jackson and Fishburne interact in a smug guy vs. crazy guy kinda way.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
14:35 / 22.06.01
Mike Ondaatje gives authorial voice on occasion, too (one of his weirdest publications is a prose/poem/collage called the True Confessions of Billy the Kid, - I think - but I must insist that Salman Rushdie be played by Alfred Molina, who has a Microsoft-style monopoly on Asian/Arabic villains.
 
 
ynh
00:34 / 23.06.01
zen: James Woods does not get to play Burroughs, and certainly isn’t Hemmingway’s love interest. He gets to be 1)silenced 2)understated, yet grossly metaphorical, and 3)asexual.

Whiskey Priestess:
Justify the Freud casting, if you would? I loathe Danny Devito, so that’s not too bad already. Lacan must interact with him.

I checked up on Alfred Molina, and he’s got some cred for the part (one of the Peruvian folks in the beginning of Raiders no less), but I think Lovitz looks more like Rushdie, and his lying character fits with the whole unreliable narrator thingie. That said, I’m putting this to a vote. Who gets it, or do they both, with Rusdie/Molina reappearing during the film he’s narrating?

The Ondaatje book is The Collected Works of Billy the Kid, but thanks. Since it’s only a cameo I want some recognizable Billy figure, prolly (shudder) Emilio Estevez in a cowboy suit.


Rizla, the only overt corpses must be Acker and Hemmingway.

grant, Wideman's worth checking out. He's good, intelligent, and is indeed very serious, even in person. Perfect for your vision. In a wonderul synchronicity, he has some voudoun influences to rattle around with Queequeg: "Damballah is the powerful serpent deity of the Rada pantheon of Haitian vodun gods. This being is much beloved by the Haitians, but is held greatly in awe. He is identified, by the process of syncretism, with St. Patrick, and is especially worshipped on Thursdays. He forms the rainbow which is regarded as an arc d'alliance between him and Aida Wedo, his wife."

[ 24-06-2001: Message edited by: [Your Name Here] ]
 
 
Disco is My Class War
23:54 / 23.06.01
How long is this film, anyhow?

Since Act Two seems to have stalled just after the Angela Davis cameo and during the Zadie/Dave moment, let's finish it off. Jared Leto plays Dave (needs to put some weight on); Thandie Newton plays Zadie.

Cut to the Kundera/Holm monologue. The muttering grows louder and louder until a door opens in Kundera's forehead, his entire body disappears through it, and in the space Audre Lorde appears, played by bell hooks. She looks left, looks right, looks into the camera. She raises her eyebrows and looks frankly unimpressed.

Cut back to Smith and Eggers: you can tell Eggers is about to ejaculate because he's describing every single little thing that's happening to him in the greatest (wittiest, most pop-culture-reference-laden) detail, from the way his fingers are going numb under the weight of Zadie's bottom to .... er. Zadie watches from above as the babble coming out of Eggers' mouth slowly turns into purple froth and drowns him. He dies. She smiles. She raises her head to look at Lorde and something magical passes between them. Cut.

[ 24-06-2001: Message edited by: D'Luscious Rosa ]
 
 
YNH
05:43 / 06.05.02
A lab, similar to the robocop "we can rebuild" scene: Reed lies on a table, missing hands and badly deformed. Donna Haraway, played by Linda Hamilton, sorts through a trough of prosthetic attatchments and monitors bioreadouts while Deep Blue (as itself [or William Gibson, inside a Gibson shell, bangs from inside and screams for help.] makes beeping noises in the background. Avital Ronnell (Milla Jovovich in cop drag) reads a list of violations perpetrated by Haraway in the language of the DEA, and shouts that all the kings' houngans and all the kings' jazz cannot reinscribe dead metaphors onto slain heroes.
 
  
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