Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Worst Movie to ever be aired on tv but never in the theater

Elijah, Freelance Rabbi

17:55 / 19.10.01

now, after school specials dont count, im talkin Cinema events here, Pilots for failed seies DO count, as mine is

Matthew Blackheart!
the Britanica description of this crap

so, who else has something?

Warrington Minge

19:32 / 19.10.01

Absolutly hated the adaptation of stephen kings IT. The book rocked but watching Tim Curry walking around on his knees chasing a pony tailed john boy walton made me want to cry. Dont these people ever read the books first.

The Invaders tv remake was poo as well. Not a patch on the original.

rizla mission

15:13 / 21.10.01

There was a Welsh wickerman style horror movie on TV last week that i watched out of curiosity just to see what a Welsh wickerman style horror movie might entail..

..it was bad beyond human conception.

I hope whoever put up the money for it's production had the decency to hunt down and slit the throats of the director, writer and crew.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

17:19 / 21.10.01

quote:Originally posted by Rizla Year Zero:
There was a Welsh wickerman style horror movie on TV last week that i watched out of curiosity just to see what a Welsh wickerman style horror movie might entail..

..it was bad beyond human conception.

I hope whoever put up the money for it's production had the decency to hunt down and slit the throats of the director, writer and crew.

Would that be

Darklands?

Cos yeah, that's poo. But not as poo as the recent rumour I heard that there was a REMAKE of "The Wicker Man" (one of my favourite films EVER) on the cards... starring NICHOLAS FUCKING CAGE!!!!
I so hope that isn't true.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

15:24 / 22.10.01

Isn't he supposed to be doing the Hellblazer movie... with John Constantine as an American?

Re-Set

18:26 / 22.10.01

Wait, they're making Constantine American? Even as a Yank, I'm highly offended.

Cop Killer

18:30 / 22.10.01

None of those are shit, I got four words for you: The Joey Butafuco Story. Cuz yeah, I'm sure a semi-attractive 16 year old seduced him and all he really wanted was to stay monogomous to his wife.

uncle retrospective

10:40 / 25.10.01

quote:Originally posted by Son of TrapSpringer:
Wait, they're making Constantine American? Even as a Yank, I'm highly offended.

But Tarzim, the director of the Cell is directing it. So 10:1 it'll be shit but look wonderful.

Elijah, Freelance Rabbi

20:18 / 26.10.01

aint he the guy who did the NIN videos?

I want the guy in charge of Tool music videos to make a lovecraft film...

Basil

11:29 / 31.10.01

I'm pretty sure I have'nt made this up.
Amytiville(?) - Dolls house.
Some of the worst effects i've ever seen, there is a scene with a giant mouse under a childs bed that beggars belief. The connection to the other films is the Stone fireplace, yet another gate way to hell. I had no idea they were so common.

Shortfatdyke

12:05 / 31.10.01

i saw a film on tv with whoopi goldberg who makes friends with a cute dinosaur thing. me and my then g/f watched in horror/morbid fascination. wish i could remember the name of it. it was totally, unbelievably awful. goldberg must've had some serious debts to pay to have gone for it.

there was also a film made in the 70s i think about giant spiders. one leapt out of a drawer on a spring and the biggest one was really obviously draped over a car.

let's be honest, though - if this thread was about worst films that DID make it to general release, you could name most of the stephen king ones....

Para Sara

12:12 / 31.10.01

Yup I've seen it -

Theo

Shortfatdyke

12:20 / 31.10.01

thanks para. nice to know it wasn't just an awful dream. i think.

ONLY NICE THINGS

12:21 / 31.10.01

Captain America.

SEE Ricardo Montalban as the Red Skull.

SEE JD Salinger's son in an ill-fitting rubber suit that, inevitably, makes him look like a wanker.

SEE too much. Far, far too much.

Best thing was that, in the flashback scene, the Red Skull looks like the Red Skull, but by the time wing-head wakes up, Montalban has decided "fuck this noise, I'm Ricardo Montalban and nobody's gonna watch this made-for-TV shit anyway" and just looks like Ricardo Montalban.

rizla mission

12:40 / 31.10.01

The Captain America film was great!

Para Sara

12:48 / 31.10.01

Anyone seen something called Doc Savage, I think thats what it was called. I remember weird looking flying yellow snakes?

Basil

13:09 / 31.10.01

Doc Savage man of Bronze: I think it was a spoof of Superman/Batman/Bond characters. Some guy had a pet pig. Doc savage went on to play Tarzan.

RexMonday

22:47 / 31.10.01

quote:Originally posted by The Lower Haus:
[QB]

SEE Ricardo Montalban as the Red Skull.

QB]

i think that was henry silva

Hieronymus

01:10 / 01.11.01

The Marvel-endorsed "Generation X" TV series pilot starring ol' Max Headroom. <attempts to stifle giggle then has brain aneurysm from laughing so hard>

Add Your Reply