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Blanking people

The Knowledge, oh yes

23:16 / 21.03.09

Who does it? Why? How do you feel when you get blanked. Are there good reasons to do it? What justifies it?

Just wondering what the general consensus on blanking is. I’ll go into a bit more detail about why I’m curious in a while…

00:45 / 22.03.09

WUT.

Jawsus-son Starship

05:58 / 22.03.09

none

08:33 / 22.03.09

I really have no idea what blanking is supposed to be.

08:48 / 22.03.09

Just wondering what the general consensus on blanking is. I’ll go into a bit more detail about why I’m curious in a while…

Or maybe now.

10:38 / 22.03.09

"Blanking" is when somebody speaks to you, or gestures to you, and you completely ignore them as though you had not seen them.

11:05 / 22.03.09

I have to do that all the time. We have a car-free zone in the neighbourhood, where you can do all your shopping and you are constantly hassled by people that want your money (join scientology, newspaper, fitness studio, WWF, etc.). Some only try to get eye contact and say "Hello, a minute of your time please?", but often they literally jump in front of you. Once a guy started insulting me, because I ignored him.

11:36 / 22.03.09

Blanking is more commonly used when you know the person, and you pretend to have missed seeing them. It's less about avoiding street traders and Scientologists, more about avoiding conversaions with people you don't really have time to talk to.

trouble at bill

16:04 / 22.03.09

yes, I'm sort of surprised that German doesn't have an equivalent term, I didn't think blanking is unique to the UK or US. Do we just mean blanking to save time, though? Because to me it also means ignoring someone you genuinely don't like. (And is it ruder to blank than to be actively unpleasant? Or is blanking in itself actively unpleasant?)

17:18 / 22.03.09

Apart from "ignorieren", "jemanden wie Luft behandeln" might be similar to blanking. It literally translates as treating someone as if ze were air.

19:42 / 22.03.09

Well, not having time to talk to someone is often nothing to do with how much time you have in total, more how much time you have for certain things.

And yes, treating someone as though they were air sounds about right.

The Knowledge, oh yes

21:29 / 22.03.09

Well, blanking is kind of like ignoring someone who tries to speak to you or gestures towards you/looks in your direction (maybe to say hi...) i.e. your face draws a 'blank' in reaction, like they were air - not there at all.

I ask because I am living in a big holiday resort, with a hardcore group of traveller employees living here for a long time now. When it comes to high status and social proof, I am wondering how you maintain this/suggest this/embody these ideas in your everyday life, when you don't actually dig some of the people who have been here awhile, and are 'higher up the ladder' so to speak, and friendly with the other long-timers who have been here longer than you. It can create problems socialising in a big group with the cool peeps, when there are people around the same table you don't like, for example.

I guess I'm asking how you maintain personal integrity whilst integrating yourself as a high status, friendly guy in the pack.

I am basically blanking several of these people, whom I consider arseholes, because they were either dismissive/blanked me/were rude when I was here for the first few weeks, and so a 'nobody,' but now they have time for me, or NO time, in reaction to my not wanting to know them, the cliquey, condescending dickheads.

Hope that helps!

22:11 / 22.03.09

I guess I'm asking how you maintain personal integrity whilst integrating yourself as a high status, friendly guy in the pack.

Your question seems to be "how do I look awesome being a douchebag to people that have been a douchebag to me?". If I'm not mis-reading this totally, I'd have to say there's not any real way to do this with integrity.

22:46 / 22.03.09

It should be possible to be polite to acquaintances and to make them understand that there is no interest for friendship. Blanking in this situation sounds very rude to me. The other people might pick up on it and it could lead to further social deterioration.

01:22 / 23.03.09

I'm fascinated by your direct and seemingly unselfconscious appraisal of the hierarchical situation you're in.
I guess I'm asking how you maintain personal integrity whilst integrating yourself as a high status, friendly guy in the pack.

Find the biggest one of the group in the cafeteria, and then shank them on day one. The pack will realize that you're friendly later, after you've put the fear of god in them first and made them supplicate by offering their bellies.
I guess it depends on what kind of personal integrity you're trying to maintain.

01:42 / 23.03.09

I find blanking a mutual thing. Sometimes there is no need for communication beyond acknowledging presence.

As for maintaining social hierarchies, you've lost me.

The Knowledge, oh yes

08:15 / 23.03.09

No...

I refuse to buy into clique-friendships for 'society's sake,' i.e. pretending to like some prick because he is liked by others, as per the Lord of the Pack survivalism, etc.

I'm not talking about people that I disagree with or don't get on with. I mean the people who slighted me as a 'newbie,' or who bullied/impressed on/promoted a higher-than-thou air upon me when I first got here.

Basically, the people that buy into that backwards idea that you earn your place and your stripes, just like them - Authoritarian arseholes, who might go in in their lives to become policemen, or politicians.

Not that I'm against the police or politicians, but in close proximity, I got a good look at them, and would rather not interact.

Which, of couse, upsets the social balance - I can see some of them, for example, willingly making shit up and making everyone promise not to let it get back to me - horrible bastards, basically. Which is why I don't want a thing to do with them, whilst I DO want to know the cool peeps.

Which is difficult though, is one of them is a loud boisterous uber-hippy who loves the sound of his own mouth and is disliked by more than a handful in the resort anyway...and the other is some young chilish selfish girl that all the guys want to shagg.

12:52 / 23.03.09

Which is difficult though, is one of them is a loud boisterous uber-hippy who loves the sound of his own mouth and is disliked by more than a handful in the resort anyway...and the other is some young chilish selfish girl that all the guys want to shagg.

To be clear on this, these two people are the ones you dislike, or the cool peeps?

The Knowledge, oh yes

00:09 / 24.03.09

I don't like the uncool peeps.

00:43 / 24.03.09

this thread makes me hate mankind.

00:53 / 24.03.09

Which, of couse, upsets the social balance - I can see some of them, for example, willingly making shit up and making everyone promise not to let it get back to me

This sounds unbelievably paranoid. Have you considered that you're overthinking the situation and it's getting the best of you? Try as I might to understand this social hell you describe, I just don't see why you don't interact minimally (but politely) with those you hate, and try to strike up a friendship with those that you feel a kinship with.

I mean, this is what life is about, right? Find a few good mates, and accept the fact that a lot of people are jerks and idiots that can be easily disregarded? I still don't get the blanking thing. It's certainly not subtle, and it seems like a boat-load of social posturing that will ultimately lead some decent peers to view you as the sort of asshole that you dislike so much.

09:08 / 24.03.09

It's certainly not subtle, and it seems like a boat-load of social posturing

Yup. Blanking is extreme passive aggressive behaviour, and will likely, if adopted as a default stance, only make your life more complicated.

To be honest the only people I have ever met who adopted blanking as a social strategy were teenagers. Silly, rude, childish teenagers who needed to grow up.

09:37 / 24.03.09

I'm not sure blanking really works if you're round a table... Isn't the idea that you could have conceivably just not noticed them? I've certainly experienced it that way.

09:55 / 24.03.09

But anyway, Zoltar, how come it's taken you almost a decade to post six posts? Have you been blanking Barbelith?

22:22 / 31.03.09

What Boboss said.

I find being blanked quite entertaining, and will sometimes titter quietly to myself as the blanker walks past me. That said, it hasn't happened to me in years. I don't blank people. Why would I?

08:38 / 02.04.09

Hm.

I would consider adopting a more inclusive "everyone's probably alright once you get to know them stance".

Chances are it's probably true, and it gets you out of awkward "crap, the young attractive girl has sat next to me and I don't know how to blank her without looking like a tool" moments.

Being the non-cliquey guy that can speak to everyone will no doubt stand you in good stead with the high-status crowd.

And in years to come, people will remember you fondly. "Ah, yes, we used to be quite cliqey and a bit harsh on the new-comers. Then Zoltar came amongst us, and showed us the error of our ways."

Start by getting to know loud boisterous hippie and young female that everyone wants to sexx.

08:53 / 02.04.09

Yesterday, I went down subway stairs and a former colleague came up the stairs. And I just walked on (he did, too). Maybe we blanked each other? It´s ca. five or more years since I talked to him. Maybe he didn´t recognize me? Otherwise, maybe it was a double blank?

18:15 / 05.04.09

Happened to me when I was a student who worked as a janitor on weekends. I was the one cleaning up your puke in the dorm bathroom. Got a few blanks from fellow classmates. I think they just didn't understand that some people *work* for a living (d!@# rich kids).

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

21:47 / 05.04.09

Zoltar, reading your posts in this thread I think you should maybe just blank EVERYONE. It'll be the best for society in the long run.

21:59 / 05.04.09

Yes, it will make you so high-status as to be a GOD.

20:05 / 06.04.09

My experiences from trying to blank people (from my High School years) is that blanking only really works if it is a majority group blanking a minority group or an individual. If, as it seems to be the case, one individual tries to blank a larger group - specially a popular one - such large group will just find it further proof that you are a freak and deserves their scorn. And, since it is the tendency that people eventually forget how a feud has begun after a while, if you insist on trying to blank them for a long period of time, people will forget you may have had a reason for blanking at some time and just consider you to be an anti-social nut who ignore people for no good reason other than being a freak. You know, like Unabomber or whatnot. Specially people who arrived after it all begun and never saw you not blanking...

In short, it just won't work. Doesn't matter if it ever was justifiable. It. Just. Won't. Work. Dude!