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Favorite kind of burrito?

 
  

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dark horse
18:30 / 13.11.08
personally i think you can't beat a good steak burrito with black beans.... no sour cream though that makes it too soggy... how about u barbelith?
 
 
Tsuga
18:41 / 13.11.08
sweet jesus.
 
 
Tsuga
18:42 / 13.11.08
Of course I'm talking about a sweet Jesus burrito (pronounced hay-soos) made with fish marinated in a sweet wine and spicy chipotle sauce, feeds a thousand.
 
 
dark horse
18:43 / 13.11.08
haha good job.
 
 
Anna de Logardiere
21:02 / 13.11.08
No sour cream? You've got problems.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
00:20 / 14.11.08
godstallion;

Something ... quite bad happened to a co-worker of mine, very recently.

It was an accident, it was, but I'm not going to gamble on that standing up in court, so what's to be done with the body? What do you think?

I'm kind of embarrassed about the situation generally; the pad, now rather red, you know, cost me a fortune. But you seem like a 'go-to' guy when it comes to this stuff, so any advice would be appreciated.

Cheers.

(An early reply would be best - I don't know how much longer I can allow the, um, gubbins to leak into my stylish oak floorboards.)
 
 
dark horse
13:21 / 14.11.08
sorry man i don't think i can help you, this thread is about burritos.
 
 
grant
15:12 / 14.11.08
First, you must select the proper beast. Evaluate the condition of its hooves for excessive cracking or signs of brittleness, and ensure the teeth and gums are firm and healthy. This is especially important with specimens extracted from wild or feral populations. If possible, change its diet to one high in masa (finely ground corn meal), cumin, brown sugar and fresh herbs daily as much as six weeks before slaughter.

After gently singing the hair off the carcass, remove sections of skin from above the haunches and along the spine approximately five inches square. Marinate these in olive oil with 1 part cinnamon, 2 parts peppercorns, 2 parts cayenne pepper flakes and 4 parts garlic over very low heat for at least 12 hours. While marinating, dress the rest of the carcass normally and hang to cure.

Gather dried evergreen branches and green alligator juniper (Juniperus deppeana, also known as tascale or huata) from the northern slopes of the Sierra Madre Occidental, enough to supply fuel and smoke for 24 hours.

In cast-iron pots, begin soaking turtle beans in a 50 percent mixture of cider vinegar and water. Drain and refresh the mixture twice in 10 hours, then place over low heat to simmer for 10 further hours. Add an inch-long stem of fresh rosemary and three tablespoons of dried sage for every 2 pounds of beans. When half the liquid has evaporated during the simmer, add strips of fat carved from the beast's loins and belly, approximately 1 cup per 4 pounds of beans.

The cheese is best taken from a three-year-old ewe grazing on the pastures of Cuatro Ciénegas, especially Ejido La Vega in early April. For every gallon of milk, add 2 tablespoons fresh lime juice. Mix thoroughly, allow to coagulate for two hours, strain through cheesecloth, then press and refrigerate with salt to taste.

Cut long strips of flank and loin from the dressed carcass. Marinate with 1 part bitter (Seville) orange juice, 2 parts oil from the skin-sections, 4 parts Casa Madero Vino Tinto Cepa Shiraz. Slice long shards of 4 pounds of fresh yellow onions and place between layers of meat as if making a terrine. Allow to soak for more than 2 hours but less than 4.

Begin the salsa by dicing several pounds of fresh pink Zapotec tomatoes. In a hot skillet, burn the skins of an equal quantity of washed tomatilloes with the papery outer husks removed, and with a half a clove of garlic per tomatillo. Allow to cool, then dice and add to tomatoes. Mince a generous quantity of Mexican tarragon and stir gently into the mixture.

In a separate dish, dice several pounds white onions. Garnish liberally with chopped cilantro and a pinch of ground coriander seed per cup. Cover with fresh lime.

The arugula must be young and fine; dispose of the leaves at the smallest sign of yellowing, spotting or toughness. Rinse thoroughly three times in fresh snowmelt from the mountain streams of El Coahuilón, then chop coarsely.

Mash beans with wooden pestle, remove any large sections of fatty meat.

In iron skillets, heat 2 inches of oil until almost smoking. Rapidly deep fry the sections of skin until nearly crispy. In the center of each section, while still hot and pliable, place strips of marinated burro meat, chopped arugula, beans, cheese and a small portion of salsa, then fold into a pouch. If unaccustomed to the process, you may need to pre-form the skin into an envelope shape before frying.

Over a roaring, open fire of evergreen and smoking juniper, roast the burritos until cheese is melted and meat medium rare, usually no more than 20 minutes. Serve with additional fresh salsa and onions spooned over the top, on an open veranda overlooking a hacienda in the scrub outside Durango, or al fresco in a camp near the pyramids of the Yucatan. (If south of the equator, accompany with fresh avocado drizzled with lime.)
 
 
Eek! A Freek!
15:12 / 14.11.08
Mmmmm. Ex-Co-Worker-Marinated-in-Gin Burrito with gubbin sauce. Add a bit of horseradish and I think we have a winner.

Remember: Vegans make the tastiest Soylent Green.
 
 
trouble at bill
15:17 / 14.11.08
Grandma dear, while admittedly the practice of necrophagia has in the past raised some controversy amongst the chattering classes, here on the 'Lith we are too radical for such Daily Mail mores. So, I think the only way to resolve your, uh domestic issue, while keeping this thread firmly on topic, is for you to consume all the evidence, in burritos. With sour cream. Do it with sour cream and then Godstallion will be totally skived out and go like, eeeeeeew, soggy burritos! And that'll be kewl, heh.
 
 
Eek! A Freek!
15:17 / 14.11.08
Grant, Expand on that a bit by throwing in a few violent conflicts around some dodgy characters trying to steal the recipe and you have a shoe-in for the NNWM2008 thread.
 
 
trouble at bill
15:22 / 14.11.08
"Soylent Green is Vegans!"
 
 
Harrison Ford, in a battle suit, wheels for feet, knives and guns
15:40 / 14.11.08
for the love of...
 
 
Eek! A Freek!
15:40 / 14.11.08
I'm afraid that I'll have to bill you now since I have you as a COD account in our system...
 
 
dark horse
17:48 / 20.11.08
i don't get this ^^^

anyway last night i was driving home baked and got a couple of tacos al pastor with cilantro and sour cream from la raza on belmont, they were sweeeeet.
 
 
astrojax69
02:10 / 22.11.08
no no no grant no. wrong, all so awfully wrong... the cheese must come from a four year old ewe, with three lambing seasons behind it. sheesh, don' you know nuffink?

(as for the 'south of the equator' bit, i prefer avocados souzled in cumquat juice, but that is just a personal preference)

i rekkun crocodile burrito would be good, but. with bush tomato and re-fried black-eyed beans & buffalo mozzarella.
 
 
Essential Dazzler
13:04 / 22.11.08
anyway last night i was driving home baked

I hope you were a passenger not the driver.
 
 
Eek! A Freek!
14:57 / 22.11.08
Impaired drivers are infinitly worse scum than crackheads...


Ooops. Crossthread.


Crack burrito?
 
 
Char Aina
16:36 / 22.11.08
What if a crackhead goes for a drive?
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
13:07 / 04.01.09
Shut up dark stallion. Shut up and fuck off.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
13:10 / 04.01.09
I mean, seriously. Look at this guy. Just look at him. Look at the shit he posts. What a complete and total fucking waste of pixels.
 
 
Ava Banana
20:14 / 04.01.09
I don't think you're alone in your thoughts Sage, had to breathe deeply on a couple of posts m'self. Come back to your sweary thread and dazzle us with a breathtaking flow of invective instead. Might make you feel better.
 
 
dark horse
21:17 / 04.01.09
sorry that this thread isnt as good as one for swearing at people,

in case you couldn't tell, that was sarcasm... i don't understand why i am being singled out for harsh treatment like this, it seems like victimization to me... maybe barbelith is not the cool tolerant place i thought it was at first.....
 
 
Ava Banana
21:49 / 04.01.09
You're not at all being 'singled out', you're being called out on a few dodgy things that you've said, the same as anyone else would be. It's happened to me and lots of other people. If you like it here and wish to get along, why don't you put aside your defensiveness and try and examine what others are saying and why they might be saying it?
 
 
iamus
21:55 / 04.01.09
He knows fine well Ava, and is up to cheeky shenanigans.

He's a clever little petal. But not quite as clever as he'd like to think, I think.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
21:56 / 04.01.09
I'd agree that SAGE is being out of order here.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
21:59 / 04.01.09
SAGE is not to say such bad things about Flyboy.
 
 
Liger Null
22:01 / 04.01.09
I wish Flyboy would just come back for real. Or, even better, have an all-out BATTLE with this alter ego of his and rip the little fucker to shreds...
 
 
dark horse
22:08 / 04.01.09
why do people need to believe in conspiracy theories? tbh a lot of people here seem obsessed with the past.... i'm sure things were good here" back in the day" but its time to move on, just like grant has done, he's not wirting the invisibles anymore for example now is he.
 
 
Liger Null
22:17 / 04.01.09
OK, now I'm convinced it's a joke-suit.
 
 
Ava Banana
22:19 / 04.01.09
Yes, let's inundate the place with sexism and bigotry and all that other good stuff, it will really show everyone how much we've moved on.

Gah! Must not feed trolls, not even on....burritos, aaaand we're back on topic!
 
 
iamus
22:19 / 04.01.09
That may have been a tip of the hand too far.
 
 
Ava Banana
22:20 / 04.01.09
I must be more than a little tiddly to engage in this nonsense, I should have listened to you Iamus!
 
 
iamus
23:25 / 04.01.09
Nah. Don't bother listening to me. I'll only disappoint you.
 
 
Anna de Logardiere
20:57 / 05.01.09
Did you know that burrito means little donkey which is really quite fitting for barbelith which has had many, many posters who perceived themselves as little donkey's over the years?
 
  

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