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Anyone care to plug?

 
 
Clavis
02:22 / 23.09.01
I was hoping there was a topic under which people would plug their own work, but I don't see one, so (new though I am) I have created one. Feel free to plug yourselves if you've got anything to plug. So here I go:

Know Thyself, Show Thyself: A Guide to Becoming the Person You've Always Dreamed of Being, by Dr. Victor August.

That's me. I'm "Dr. Victor August". The book is real, although its content is satirical, fictional and damned funny. At least, the people who've read it so far seem to think so. And imagine my surprise when I wander grant-morrison.com, only to find that GM has written two chapters of a satirical self-help book. I guess great minds really do think alike. Now if only I could find a PO Box address to which I could mail GM a copy...

Know Thyself, Show Thyself. Available at the major online bookstore of your choice. Hopefully, this book will someday be discussed on forums such as this one without the author having to push it.


Clavis

[ 23-09-2001: Message edited by: Clavis ]
 
 
Jack Fear
11:44 / 23.09.01
I've got six paragraphs in the National Story Project anthology I Thought My Father Was God, edited by Paul Auster. It's just one of 179 stories, and was never read on the radio, but it's still kind of a thrill.

Information on the Project here: http://www.npr.org/programs/watc/storyproject/index.html

Info on the book here: http://www.henryholt.com/2001f-hh/thoughtfathergod.htm

A review here (check pargraph three--I'm as astounded as anyone...): http://ae.boston.com/books/reviews/auster.html

Boston promotional event coming up in ten days: I'm totally freaked out about it.

[ 23-09-2001: Message edited by: Jack Fear ]
 
 
grant
17:13 / 24.09.01
Oh, you big crybaby!
Cool!!
 
 
Whisky Priestess
21:53 / 24.09.01
So Mr. Fear, you write as Jack Fear? Nice pseudonym. I decided to publish under the name Randy Badger until I realised this was teh real name of a friend's colleague. Then I tried Ransom Love, only to realise that he is already the very-much-existent head of a major computer corporation.

BTW, what is it with Americans and weird names? I love them, but sheesh. Mr and Mrs Love look at their screaming bundle of boy joy and decide to call him Ransom?
 
 
Jack Fear
14:59 / 25.09.01
Yes, Whiskey, my byline appears in the book just as it appears here: "Jack Fear, somewhere in Massachusetts."

I've been Jack Fear so long and so thoroughly that it doesn't feel like a pseudonym at all. It's my birth name, give or take a syllable—a little punchier and easier to remember: rather as if our esteemed Grant Balfour wrote as, say, "Grant Ball," for instance—and it's the name by which I'm known among my friends—the only name by which some of them know me, in fact.

It's the name under which I make restaurant reservations; the US postal service regularly delivers letters and packages sent addressed to that name; people who don't know I'm Jack Fear don't really know me at all.

Plus, in this case, it gives an added layer of anonymity and privacy to the people who are the subject of my story, which is important to me: I was worn to secrecy about the incident.

[ 25-09-2001: Message edited by: Jack Fear ]
 
 
grant
17:31 / 25.09.01
quote:Originally posted by Jack Fear:
: rather as if our esteemed Grant Balfour wrote as, say, "Grant Ball,"


I prefer to be known as Mr. Four, thank you kindly.
 
 
autopilot disengaged
09:25 / 26.09.01
uh: i have no book to plug, but if anyone wants to read any of my stuff, y'know, before it's published/performed etc - lemme know and i'll mail it along to you like a benign enlightenment virus.
 
 
Mr Tricks
09:25 / 26.09.01
Well.. I contributed a chapter & illustrations in an ACTUAL self help book


QIGONG: Essance of a Healing Dance

then of course you can witness my design exploits Here!!!

Or on newstands . . .
 
 
Whisky Priestess
14:32 / 28.09.01
Every single one of the sex columns on this critical-and-creative website www.einekleine.com is written by me.

Actually, so's most of the rest of it. Sh, don't tell anyone.

Bored much? Nah.

[ 28-09-2001: Message edited by: Whisky Priestess ]
 
 
deja_vroom
20:15 / 13.10.01
I`d link to some online places which show my short fictions, but it`s all in portuguese and I don`t feel like translating.
Instead, take some oven ready poetry:

THE JADE EMPEROR

I

I was
The jade Emperor
Commanding the legions
And the lines and patterns of the palace
And the topiary.

I was
A priviledged angle
To watch the scene of treachery
And murder.

And more,
Through the gardens and corridors,
Scented in sandalwood
In the Sunday morning,
I was
Flowers kept in the shut mouth
Of the animal which was killed by the arrow.

II

And whatever is the Sun
And whatever is it that the sky is made with
In this imperial morning?

III

The Imperial Ghost-Police
Found the bodies
Of the lovers, dried up,
Horrid eyes in despair, drinking
The last drop of poison,
Fingernails ripping the flesh
Of what passed as being love,
Born unnoticed between the preparations
For the imperial wedding party.

The relations of the outside things
With the greenish body of the jade Emperor
Gives him the measure of pain that a monarch can endure
In being a monarch of jade.

IV

Little adorned box
Covered with gems and sweet woman`s scorn.
Gold and jewels, and empty, kept
Uncomfortably
In the jade Emperor`s trachea.
By means of a troublesome expedient
The Emperor, with a smile,
Sits upright between the cushions
And tries to find the adequate position
for Pain In The Trachea.
But the light, coming from outside the castle,
With legs wide spread, cries and shoots in despair,
And hurts
And hurts again and still,
For several times in the following days
Will crush under its heels
The eyes for shedding tears.

V

The Emperor wakes up
Shapeshifts into someone important
And His face is a mask
To follow in the TV-box
The long speechs to come
And the stunned looks in the servant`s faces.
He tells with vivacity and style
The story heard from the mouth of the monster Gila,
About the colossal beetle that will devour the Earth,
Starting from the edges.
It is late in the jade palace,
And those who were born in the Century of History
Are named after extinct flowers.

VI

One day the Emperor woke up with thirst,
And His hooves drank from the rivers.
One day the Emperor woke up with hunger,
And He devoured His right hand.

VII

"It`s going to be such a beautiful day",
Thought an imperial warrior,
"But one needs to be strong and live".
There is a woman
In Mandchury
Who has sons and daughters, and a river and a house
And daguerreotypes
Showing funny family scenes.
The warrior devours the scene with his eyes, and feels dizzy.
He is taken care of by the woman,
Who says her name is "Lian".
The warrior throws away his helmet
And runs
And runs across the plains,
And turns into a horse,
Then into warrior again,
But he can`t turn into a man
He can`t become human,
So he tries to become
A typewriter, airplane pilot, comic book hero,
Panic in the main hall!!
The woman`s children grab him by his legs,
As if playing,
And they fall in the river.
Far away, the jade Emperor walks by,
Obscuring the Sun with His jade head.

VIII

It`s night,
The children sleep,
And love was made
By those who had
Love to be made
At night.
But the terrible Green Monarch
Walks by with His old mineral feet,
Waking up the swans by the pool,
And the dead cooks in the castle`s pantry.

And the noise
Will bring nightmares
To ride those
Who don`t deserve them.
The Emperor forgives them all.
What authority does he have
To inflict damage upon them?

IX

Above,
In the clouds,
Exempt of color descriptions,
Something happens
Without being noticed,
And happens
Alone in the world.
Prevailing upon God`s existence.
Because it happens and no one is accountable,
But it happens alone.

(The Parchs enter the scene
And whisper in wailing chant:
"Woe to the Emperor! Woe to the Emperor!")

X.

Educated and dressed
The Emperor`s seven sons
Draw up in a line.
In an exaggerated tragic position,
Sammael
Galla
Behemoth
Leviathan
Maskim
Moloch
And Azazel
Behead themselves mutually.

But the Emperor turns His face
From the frightful scene
That takes form in His frightful face.

ejsm 121001
*************************
THE EGG WITHOUT TONGUE

I

Something
Slowly
Bursts.

II

The day
Injects itself as a needle
In the muscles of time.

The tongue
It`s a cavernous body.
It`s a piston.

III

The egg without tongue
In the vestibule of things.
Has eyes that demand retins,
Soon.

IV

Weight kisses itself,
Blossoms
In soft layers,
Onward, hanging.

(Gravity gapes).

V

Egg and spore
Slowly
Placenta.

Something swims
Slowly to the beach.
******************************
 
 
Frances Farmer
20:26 / 13.10.01
Uh. I had a couple of minor poetry pieces published in an extremely local magazine called "Wax". Unfortunately, I don't believe there's a web page.

And it was put together by a group who referred to themselves as the "evil secret cabal".

But it was awfully to be considered fit for publishing.

No plug for me, I guess.

;b
 
 
Burning Man
15:36 / 01.11.01
I'll plug my book The Long Road: A Fable.
http://www.globalorgasmday.com/evolve/pages/longroad.htm

You can read the whole thing free on-line or buy at Amazon.

Frank Cooper was at the end of his rope: no job, no friends, no family, no purpose.

After an encounter with the mysterious Wiseman he was charged with an impossible task. Now as the newly rechristened Seeker, Frank will travel past the end of the Earth to the world Outside where he will meet all manner of fantastic people, visit exotic lands and ultimately journey into the heart of himself. The Long Road is an adventure that will fill your heart with joy, challenge your beliefs... and change the way you view yourself.

Check it out.
 
 
Clavis
00:28 / 14.11.01
Burning Man! You used IUniverse, just like me! Don't they rule?

They really helped me with my book, Know Thyself, Show Thyself: A Guide to Becoming the Person You've Always Dreamed of Being. AOK!


Dr. Victor August
(aka John Clavis)
 
 
Shortfatdyke
11:58 / 14.11.01
neat to see what people here get up to.

i've had short stories published in various sci-fi small press magazines. most recently, though, i had an article on a feminist group published in the december issue of diva (uk lesbian monthly magazine).
 
 
deja_vroom
14:58 / 14.11.01
I'm halfway through my book. Once it's done, it's gonna be translated to all languages on Earth, due to massive critical and public appraisal. I'll let you know. And when they hand me the ol' literature NObel, I'll be wearing a barbelith t-shirt

(I'm serious about the book, though.)
 
 
Clavis
04:19 / 01.12.01
Buy my book!
 
 
Logos
22:38 / 01.12.01
Hey, Jack!

Just read your story. Liked it muchly. I'm now chartreuse with envy...
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
07:56 / 02.12.01
Wish I had current stuff to plug.. though I thin I've still got some copies of my old sf zine "Postcards from Murmansk" if anyone's interested.
Give it a year or so, and you might finally see my "novel about the life of HP Lovecraft"... hopefully the literary equivalent of Tim Burton's "Ed Wood" (only probably not as good). Also intending to start a "weird fiction" online zine... anyoned interested or willing to submit content/tell me how computers work?
 
 
Scrubb is on a downward spiral
11:15 / 12.12.01
Plugging by proxy:

Reading the Vampire Slayer, ed. Roz Kaveny

Critical theory and Buffy in one glorious tome. One of the chapters is written by my housemate. Buy it and keep her in corsets.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
11:43 / 12.12.01
Wow. Guess what I want for Christmas?
 
 
pointless and uncalled for
12:02 / 12.12.01
I'll stick my stuff up here. You'll probably hate it but if you do then you shouldn't have read it in the first place.

The Crying Woman

Trattoria Empatica

It's all in Zipped documents. Go one rip me a new one.

Ooops, a few problems there, that should spawn a download prompt for you.

[ 12-12-2001: Message edited by: potus ]
 
  
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