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Bipolar Mania as Shamanic Initiation and Illumination

 
 
Stigma Enigma
07:29 / 19.04.07
I just finished paperwork declaring an interdisciplinary major between literature, psychology, and religious studies.

An important part of this approach is connecting Western psychiatric pathology to altered states in Eastern and tribal cultures.

This goes beyond just personal interest. Its my calling now, after 6 years of being diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Without going into too much detail...my initial manic episode was very much an uncontrollable unrelenting state of what Morrison called "magical consciousness". Constant interaction with the infinite, cosmic unity, collapse of linear time, the whole deal.

Of course, when this all went down I didn't know what the hell was going on, severe psychic inflation ensues, delusions, spiral, institution, depression, wash rinse repeat until 05 where I finally get stable.

The more I look deeper into what I experienced and encounter thinkers that see the TRUTH in what I experienced the more I realized how fucked up the American Mental Health system is. I will spare you the details.

I don't know if any of you share my diagnosis, but I am very curious to hear what any of you know in regards to this area.

The article that inspired me to write this was Phil Hine's "Are You Illuminated?" in the disinfo Book of Lies. Ever since reading the Invisibles I've been encountering all this knowledge that seems to be directly speaking to me, guiding me, I feel very much connected and on the right path.

I have a year left of undergraduate study and I am all over the place with this, Grof, Morrison, Foucault, Coleridge, Keroauc, Kesey...and hopefully soon......Barbelith =)
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
08:33 / 19.04.07
I think you have to be a bit careful about this kind of thing, Eazy. I'd point out for a start that most shamanic cultures, whilst admitting the validity of direct spiritual contact and magical consciousness, also admit the possibility of mental illness. Most actually have processes and tests to ensure that a person who presents with eg voices in the head really is recieving Spirit FM, rather than just hallucinating.
 
 
Z. deScathach
09:27 / 19.04.07
There have been times in my practice where, in my terms, things got a bit, well, "hairy". The one question that I asked myself is, "Am I drowning in this?" The answer has so far been no.

It's a hard issue. My late partner, (she died of cancer), had mental illness issues, and I could see that there was a distinct difference between those issues and what was sometimes going on with me. She would occasionally go off her meds, and all hell would break loose, and I don't mean in a spiritual sense.

Still, it is true that the psychiatric community can have a bias against experiences that occur in magick. All you have to do is look at schizotypal personality disorder, which defines as pathological communication with spirits if that is not the cultural norm.

A list of symptoms is as follows:

M - magical thinking that influences behavior, superstitiousness or the paranormal
E - eccentric behavior or appearance
P - paranoid ideation
E - experiences unusual perceptions
C - constricted affect
U - unusual thinking & speech
L - lacks friends
I - ideas of reference
A - anxiety (socially)
R - rule out psychotic disorders & pervasive developmental disorder.

BTW, I just love the mnemonic for the symptoms.MEPECULIAR!

How many magicians might fit this diagnosis?

Actually, me. I got the diagnosis when I was Wiccan, and made the mistake of talking to a therapist about my experiences in practice, and my beliefs. When I looked it up in DSM-III, (the manual of the time), I promptly went to him, read him off for pathologizing my religion, had him OFFICIALLY pull the diagnosis, and fired him. After that I was A LOT more careful.

A good friend of mine is a psychiatrist, and he and I had a chat about it. He told me that the rule of thumb that he applied was, "Is it pathological, i.e., is it harming the patient, or destroying their life." I told him about my spirit communications, he asked me what they told me. I responded, "Usually, I get good advice." "How do you feel about them?", he asked. "Pretty good.", I replied. "Anything bad ever shown up?" "Actually, yes." "What do you do?" "I banish it." "Does it stay away?" "Yes."

He told me that he felt that what I was experiencing was not pathological, and that non-pathology was the difference between what was occuring with me, and what was occuring with his patients.

I agree with Talks to Strangers on this. It can be a sticky wicket, as people who have serious illness can go off their meds, and very bad things can happen. Not only that, but I think all of us probably have seen a practitioner go over the edge. It's scary to me, because it's a reminder of just how close to that edge I sometimes ride. Still, you do have a point about the psychiatric community, in that it does tend to dismiss spiritual matters, and in my view, it is doing it more so every day, as consciousness get's increasingly defined as mere chemical process.
 
 
Quantum
09:55 / 19.04.07
We have some old threads that might be relevant, I'll dig them up later.
 
 
Stigma Enigma
20:49 / 19.04.07
I am definitely in the initial stages of my investigations into this matter, and doing my best to be "objective" about it...not just try and warp everything to make me feel better about myself or carry out some mindless rebellion.

Yes, the key to what leads people to hospitalizations is "danger to oneself or others". Its just a very disempowering, oppressive, condescending environment. What I would hope to see in the future is therapists who are more well versed in spirituality or at least not as culturally centrist. Its a difference between knowing how to deal with a patient's state of mind constructively and suppressing everything and writing it off as irrational.
I put a thread up in the lab about the pharmaceutical industry just to see where people stand. Unfortunately, mental hospitals are more than just therapeutic communities, they also have a hand in maintaining social order. My friend has a connection and I may be working at a mental hospital where I used to be a patient in a couple months (hopefully no one recognizes me at the interview, haha.) We'll see how long that lasts but at least it will give me more perspective and experience and I can relate to the patients.

Mania itself has so many different manifestations. What sparked mine was a psychedelic experience with amazonian p. cubensis, including a vision of Jimi Hendrix with Ganesh, whom I knew nothing about and had only seen pictures of (I was raised Catholic). But it was definitely the ultimate experience of "overcoming obstacles" and thinking out of the box. Things just sort of spiraled out of control after that night. Now, after the initial explosion and six years of extremes, its a constant move to stay within certain boundaries and at the same time push them out so I don't get stuck in a "reality tunnel". Keeping my feet on the ground and my head in the clouds.

I've been looking into it and finding my case may be more unique than I thought, which would threaten the universality of my claims, but I still see the need for reform.

Z, thank you for sharing your experience with me. I have definitely suffered from many "MEPECULIAR"'s. I am a new fan of Stan Grof and if you want to read a great book about consciousness being MORE than chemical processes check out "The Holotropic Mind". A lot of the states he talked about pop up in the Invisibles as well, my religious studies professor even let me write a paper on it!

Its very sticky, as you mentioned. Quantum, I am doing my best to be careful and being a good boy and taking my medicine and getting sleep. Right now, its a matter of amassing knowledge before I jump to conclusions. So thank you all for responding and offering your insights. =)
 
 
lith lurker
21:22 / 24.05.07
Eezy
I know this thread was getting a little old, but I really wanted to respond.

Your ideas of finding the link between Madness and Magic resonate deeply with me. I have spent the last couple years exploring the same concept within the confines of my life and the world around me.
I share a similar story of mania, confinement and subsequent search for understanding.

I have come to understand my experience in traditional clinical terms, but I equally believe that examined from a different perspective the event is synonomous with the neo-shamanic gnosis.

So why not choose the more interesting option?

However I am curious what common factors contributed towards shaping our similar revelations.

I am working on incorporating my situation and resulting ideas into a Graphic Novel, but the chance to discuss with someone who apparently had a very-identical experience is too incredible to pass up!
 
 
Pyewacket The Elder
22:04 / 01.06.07
Hi guys. I'm skeptical about the madness/magick conception. That one is synonymous with the other...

You may have heard the often repeated cliche that that the difference between a schizophrenic and a shaman/mystic is that the schizophrenic is drowning but the shaman is swimming.. As this nice sounding but unverifiable sentence implies it may be that the two draw direction from the same sources however...

You see I think these shamen guys are seen as a bit odd but in fact are actually knowingly spot-on in the kinds of behaviour they 'feed forward' into their community. As a case example read a good biography of the original Sai Baba (not the new dude with the holy afro). He was the proverbial 'cunning' chap. He behaved oddly and incongruously with 'normal' community behaviour however the results of his behviour were beneficial to that community.

I fail to see the direct link between conditions that disingage people from being so ingenious with the signals they feed forward into their community, and those cunning folk who do this in full knowledge of deliberate intention (even if others dont immediately get the 'method in their madness').

There are enough doley crowleys already methinks. they really change things man. ahem.
 
 
Imaginary Mongoose Solutions
22:12 / 01.06.07
The problem is that when people with possible "magical" symptoms encounter the mental health system, things that are associated with shamanism/magical thinking get treated as mental disorders.

Makes it really hard to tell what is what. That and many accounts of various indigenous people's versions of "shaman sickness" seem REALLY similar to schizophrenic outbreaks.

So I think the issue is that while you generally can feel the vibe shaman-y types bring forth into the community, that same vibe can get you heavily medicated as well. That said, I wouldn't want to glamourize schizophrenia (having watched my father's breakdown as a kid).
 
 
Pyewacket The Elder
22:43 / 01.06.07
I would posit that a real shaman wouldn't end up being in the situation of being sectioned...kind of the antithesis of being 'cunning'.

HOWEVER that is not to say that the organization of western 'democratic' culture is the same as some general tribal idea of culture. Someone going through a mental breakdown in western culture may be seen in a 'shamanic' light in a tribal culture that, by this viewpoint, enables and facilitates that individuals improvement. The effect of being seen by the rest of society as either:

a) communing with the spirits

or

b)mental

must not be taken lightly in regard to the end result.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
01:11 / 02.06.07
Shamanshamanshaman... you know if you say it enough times it becomes totally meaningless. Ohwait.

I'd just like to point out that this whole thing where there's these fabled shamanic cultures which would recognise, in a trice, the cool majykl talking-to-spiritsness of the schizophrenic who is only Mad By Society's Laws(TM) is actually a bit of a total load of old cobblers. Sorry.

In real life, cultures where shamanic abilities are deemed to exist seem to have checks and balances in place to sort out the voices-in-the-head people who have spirits talking to them, the VITH people who just wish they had spirits talking to them, and VITH people who have real actual voices in the head but who don't have spirits (or at least not the kinds of spirits that one can have a productive working relationship with). This perplexes anthropologists, who see a bunch of old VITH dudes turn up to check out a new VITH person, only to shake their heads and recommend some course of treatment instead of accepting the sufferer as a n00b shaman.

It is, of course, perfectly possible for someone talking to "real" spirits in our cultural context to get sectioned, at least in the early days. One fairly consistant cross-cultural feature of the shamanic experience seems to be the shaman-sickness. This is an affliction which may be of longer or shorter duration depending on who or what you're dealing with, but which is always life-threatening at some point. This can involve a temporary breakdown in one's mental state; the temporariness of this should be stressed, since one is supposed to emerge from it at some point.

Arguably a fully-functioning shaman would need to be more "sane" than the average Joe because ze is going to have to deal first with a massive change in hir life (note that in some cultures the spirits might turn up and kill off most of your immediate family, or drive them mad, or demand your hand in marriage, or force you to change gender) and then with working two jobs (because despite what some modern wannabe shamans might think, hanging out with the spirits doesn't always mean that your tribe is going to give you a free ride).

It's also entirely possible to fail at shaman. If you don't do like the nice invisible people tell you, They can get awfully cross. Running you mad is part of the recorded M.O.
 
 
Imaginary Mongoose Solutions
02:32 / 02.06.07
>In real life, cultures where shamanic abilities are deemed to exist seem to have checks and balances in place to sort out the voices-in-the-head people who have spirits talking to them, the VITH people who just wish they had spirits talking to them, and VITH people who have real actual voices in the head but who don't have spirits (or at least not the kinds of spirits that one can have a productive working relationship with).

And according to a few ethnographies, enough politics centered around the shaman-y positions to still blur those lines. Because, you know... some people, shamans from indigenous groups included... are power hungry. "Shaman" is such a loaded and abused term.

the temporariness of this should be stressed, since one is supposed to emerge from it at some point.

True. I'll confess... this is a topic that makes me uncomfortable given my a) family history of mental illness and b) visions, possible symptoms of "shaman sickness", snakes in my head who encouraged me to walk away from chaos magician as an identity label and way of doing magick and to seek out different paths and try to heal within my community.

Which is not to say "I are kool shaman"* (I'm still wrestling with a lot of things...) but which is to say I'd be lying if the possibility of mental illness hasn't crossed my mind once or thrice. Truth be told and all that.

If you don't do like the nice invisible people tell you, They can get awfully cross. Running you mad is part of the recorded M.O.

A'yep. It certainly is.

*Footnote: Hell, I've told very few people about this aspect of my struggling with a path simply because I don't like how shamanism is treated in new age/occulture circles. It seems many people want to be "shaman" but without any of the work or baggage. I'm terrified of the baggage but I know (because the snakes in my head told me -- always handy to have around) that "results oriented magic" just ain't gonna cut it anymore... and that getting away from deity work and strong pathwork back in the day was a giant mistake. I know that shaman or no shaman, I need to either throw away the pretense of magical practice or bring my "A game" in a step it up to levels I've only brushed aganst in the past... which could fuxxor my Malkuth-based life.

Wow, that was a ranty footnote. But did I make any sense?
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
12:02 / 02.06.07
And according to a few ethnographies, enough politics centered around the shaman-y positions to still blur those lines.

Oh for sure. Just because you're a tribal shaman doesn't mean you're not a petty-minded little jerk. "What, that guy? His dad nicked two chickens off me last year! I'm not training him." I have had more than one experience involving a practitioner who was quite aware and accepting of magic and spirits in general telling me that I'm hallucinating and need to quit magic and go on drugs instead, largely out of pique. I doubt very much that shamanic cultures are immune to a similar sort of professional jealousy.
 
 
lith lurker
20:49 / 04.06.07
I do not mean to make the assertion that all people considered to have mental illness are equivilant to shamans or vice versa. But I do think there is a close enough connection, that certain individuals who through chance occurences and unknown, probably, unintentional subliminal mystic training are able to bridge the psychic onslaught of mental collapse towards a world of magic and the art of the unknown.

I identify my personal practice most closely with Pop Magic, but certainly utilize and learn from other techniques and ideologies, and believe them all to be connected in one sense or another. So though I would not consider myself to be a shaman in a classical definition, in a modern way I am a Shaman.
 
 
Thelonious
21:14 / 12.10.13
Hi, I am 18 and 11 months ago had a mental crisis. I experienced an episode of psychosis with it mania and paranoia. I am a rapper and was convinced I was the reincarnation of Tupac Shakur. I became hospitalized once I started to address my father as "Alpha" and claiming I'm going to school in a place called Turkey (this happened around thanksgiving). I was also claiming to be 42 years old. After my first hospitalization I was dismissed without a diagonisis and was put on medication called Respiradone. I really hated the medication it made me foggy in the head and zombie like. After I had returned home around the end of December, I still had psychotic features like believing in telepathy and communicating with a spirit called "Wusa." I also believed I had mastered the art of rap by taking part in the stream of consciousness style of rap. I hated the medicine I was on so much I decided to get off them. After this I really felt no difference, mood swings were never there and I still believed I was communicating with people through thoughts. I became very paranoid whenever I smoked pot which never happened till the psychotic episode and I stopped using it. And due to the friction between my parents and I, I had decided I was going to leave the house homeless with 20 dollars, but the morning I left the house to start this journey, I visited my school which I had become expelled from due to my behavior during psychosis (personally I thought I did nothing wrong), and again my behavior and play-fighting with other students was blown out of proportion and an ambulance was called which transported me to the hospital for a second time. From this hospital I was sent to a long-term institution where I stayed for 3 months as they tried to figure out what to diagnose me with. I was freed 9 days before my birthday on july 12th diagnosed with Bipolar 1 Disorder with Psychotic Features. I was put on monthly injections of Paliperadone which doesn't make me feel zombie like as the first medication I was on. I am back to smoking pot and do not experience the paranoia as I did, I still have rare times where I feel as though people are saying things towards me when they're not. I do not hear thoughts anymore. Now because I hate the injection monthly and am curious as to maybe I can control myself during mania and actually do something very productive if it ever comes to me again. I have decided I will get off my medication and will see if it's something I really need. Maybe there is a way you can control yourself as mania sets in and actually just have a good time and take advantage of what you can from it. I am not even sure mania will set it just because my psychosis was so acute. This is my story, tell me your opinion.
 
 
T Blixius
04:52 / 24.10.13
In my opinion, I don't think you should go off your medication. I had a good friend who had several psychotic episodes in his early twenties and was eventually diagnosed with Schizophrenia after several of them. In between he'd no longer be in a psychotic state, because they'd give him Haldol. One of the features I noticed the most was that he'd return to "normal" for a period of time while taking his medications, and then he'd feel like he didn't need them and would go off them again, and he'd slowly move back towards psychosis, over a long period of time, several months, him gradually building up to it. Whenever he'd have psychotic breaks, it would start with him not sleeping properly for several days and he'd ideate weird ideas, in particular he would say things like he had native american bloodline when in fact this wasn't the case, based on the color of his hands. His medications did put a damper on his personality, but it was better than when he would go manic and eventually psychotic. There were episodes like, he was receiving signals from plants telling him to renounce earhly possessions, things of this nature. I also think you should avoid pot. Although pot helps one to be creative, it's probably not a good idea with the problems you've (and likely will again) experience. I also find that it increases anxiety related issues. Even people that have had no acute mental health issues like yourself have issues from time to time smoking pot.

As far as this thread is concerned, it's quite interesting I think anyone with an interest in magick probably has some issues to start with. I include myself in this category, in particular Schizotypal personality disorder, etc. Although I find it quite liberating to explore magickal subjects and concepts as a form of spiritual practice, one of the fundamental features of practicing it is that you are opening yourself up to experiences that are close to the edge what what I'd call sanity. It's a good idea to get familiar with where that edge is, because it's easy to cross it, even for someone who hasn't had any breaks or who have required hospitalization. Just my 2 cents...Also as far as your parental problems I've had similar issues when I was younger and one thing I'd like to tell you is no matter how bad things seem or are, take the long view. Nothing stays the same for very long in life and even if you're in a bad position, it will eventually change, so try to fight feeling hopeless. It's a long haul and it's worth fighting it out when your mind isn't working well and you're stressed. Best of Luck going forward.
 
 
Thomas Caedmon
00:49 / 12.11.13
Sorry to go off topic, just wondering if this board has any regulars and admins to sort out the spam?
 
  
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