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I've decided today that after reading this:
AT ABOUT 1 A.M., A MAN CALLED POLICE from his apartment on Peachtree Road. He said a burglar was holding a gun to his head. Police raced to his apartment, where the front door was partially open. The caller was sitting on the sofa, watching a porn video. He wasn't wearing any pants -- or underwear, for that matter. The man said there was no burglar in his apartment, and in fact, he made up the story. Police noticed several crack pipes on the living-room table. The man, 41, went to jail for reporting a fake crime.
And remembering this:
1995 -- Larry W. Russell, 32, was charged with damaging telephone equipment belonging to the Bob Friederich Insurance Co. in Belleville, Ill., in March. Police found him at night in his car, with his pants down, and with a wire running from the Friederich building into his car. Police said he had tapped into an outside telephone box to call 900-number sex-talk operations.
....that the title of my autobiography will be There Are A Lot of Men Out There Not Wearing Pants: A Struggle to the Top.
It's just so, so, so apt. |
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