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SPOOOOOOOooon!

  
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
23:42 / 20.12.06
I've got so used to talking about having the spoons to do this or the spoons to do than that I sometimes forget that most people will not have the tiniest clue what I'm on about.

Spoon Theory originated with a young woman who suffers from Lupus (Systemic lupus erythematosus, or SLE). It is a very useful way to talk about the little chunks of activity that our various disabilities allow us.

Obviously very few people reading this will be afflicted with lupus itself, which is mercifully rare. But a lot of people will have serious conditions of one kind or another that limit the amount of spoons they can play around with.

I'm lucky. I don't have lupus, I have other stuff, so I start most days with about 20 spoons.

I wake up. I get out of the bed, scrub my teeth and wash up. (1 spoon.) I make the tea and do a couple of last night's plates. (2 spoons.) I need to get to the shops, so I have to get dressed. Thus begin the Bra Wars: what fit me on Tuesday may be to big or too small right now, so I have to locate something clean and functional (3 spoons). I have to assess what top clothes I'll need for the work I'm doing today, which probably means locating two sets--one to fix the leak in the bathroom and one to teach in (4 spoons). I pop out to the cornershop for milk and bread (5 spoons. No, seriously, cornershop is a whole spoon--I have to make sure I'm decent, I have to find my keys, I have to make sure I have enough money, I have to make sure I have a full Ventolin--it's a spoon). If I make a cooked breakfast, SPOON! (6 spoons).

Hopefully it's still fairly early, so I can go to the gym without too much stress. (The gym or equivalent is mandatory, btw--skiving for more than one day costs at least 5 spoons. You have to go, whether you feel like it or not.)

Getting ready for the gym: at least one spoon. Let's be generous and say you're just going to use the pool and not the gymnasium. You will need your: swimming costume, bathing cap, towel, flip-flops, membership card, a bottle of water, your asthma meds, exact change for the locker, cash, and keys. (Hope you can remeber all that, Sparky--if you have to go back for anything, you might need a spoon for that too. Uh oh!) Let's be generous and assume the Gym Fairy put everything where we could find it: 7 spoons.

A 15-minute walk can take one to two spoons, depending. This is a good day, so one sp. (8 spoons.) Getting changed and showered, emolliating dry skin condition: a spoon (9 spoons).

This is a good day, so we'll allow 1 and a half spoons per 500 metres. Bye bye 3 spoons (12 spoons).

Deary deary me. We still have to go to work. Fortunately we're only part time and this is a light day. So, sorting out the lesson plans, getting everything printed up/photocopied: 1 spoon. (13) Let's assume this is a local class and won't cost a possible 2-4 spoons of travel time/energy. Beam me up, Scotty!

A 90-minute English class later, we are down only another couple of spoons (16).

Home sweet home. Did I finish all the shopping this morning? Oopsie. One less spoon pour moi. (17)

I cook. Hubble bubble toil and trouble, veggies chop and sauces bubble. Spoon down. (18) So I'm excercised, worked and fed, with two whole shiny spoons remaining. TWO!!!1!

Did my monniker just flash up in yr IM? Did I just call you a wanker? Did I just have at ye on LJ? You either suck or rock bigtime, because I gave you a bit of one of my spoons. (NB: This has been a good day. Most days do not allow for such spooniferous profligeracy.)
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
23:44 / 20.12.06
What? I seriously did not hit POST yet. This is wrong and I'm scared.
 
 
Char Aina
23:54 / 20.12.06
ur TEh sp00n.
 
 
Char Aina
23:57 / 20.12.06
okay...
i didnt read the thread beyond the title and the latter post, and it may have been because i was drunk.

i can't tell, but i may have just been a total dick, in which case i am really sorry. confusion now has my brain, and i will both back away from the PC and recommend that someone sober delete where applicable/appropriate.

thank you.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
00:01 / 21.12.06
No, it's okay to post random stuff after a random sounding post. Hopefully one of the convo mods will be hitting "agree" on the amendations that will help this hideous mutant integrate with the rest of Barbelith.

I still don't know how it came to be posted. That was very strange.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
00:26 / 21.12.06
Glad to be of service.
 
 
Ganesh
00:33 / 21.12.06
It's ironic to the tune of ten thousand spoons.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
00:49 / 21.12.06
I think it's more ironic to the tune of somehow hitting the Ctrl or Fn keys when all you needed was a key that was less functionous or controlsome. Not as ironic, but more happeny.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
00:51 / 21.12.06
(PS: Haus, thx)
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
01:09 / 21.12.06
I hate to be weird, but I'm getting a bit of a "well, we have even nastier Spoon Demands that you do not wot of" vibe.

I am sure this is in my head.

I wasn't trying to claim a greater Spoon Debt that the average reader.

I hadn't even intended to post what I was writing; I was boshing away at a random post when I tried to edit the thread title and somehow managed to hit the wrong combination of keys. Not sure how this happended, but the next thing I knew I had this big mess on my screen and no real way to remove it. All I could do was comeplete it as gracefully as poss. Ideally I would have had a post-writing cup of tea thing in which to decide whether I wnated to post this crap or not, but like I say events and bad typing overcame me.
 
 
*
02:08 / 21.12.06
Thanks for posting this, MC. I learned about Spoon Theory recently, and it's a pretty useful learning tool I think. No, no "less spoonful than thou!" vibe came across in your post, in my opinion.
 
 
Ganesh
06:26 / 21.12.06
Who would've thought? It figures.
 
 
Ex
07:38 / 21.12.06
I think it's a handy concept. I work on a help desk and I try to remind myself at intervals that what people can do, and what they can understand, can vary wildly (between people and on different days). And that it's got little to do with their volition or my capacity to help. Even though I know that I don't work at optimum level myself all the time, I tend to forget that and assume that other people have limitless resources.

I am quite spoon-rich at this point in my life, and am grateful for that nearly all the time.
 
 
Twice
08:02 / 21.12.06
I am hearing you right back, Mordant.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
08:27 / 21.12.06
I'm definitely not claiming a spoon deficit over here - I think that at present I am lower on spoons than usual, which means things are not getting done - work and Christmas, basically - but these are environmental factors, is all. I like the model.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
08:59 / 21.12.06
It's an extremely useful idea - I've got a close friend who's been long-term disabled for years (with RSD) and while I have always known that she has to plan and portion her day, and that it can be exhausting for her even to talk to people for an hour, the spoons analogy is vivid and much more immediate than my theoretical knowledge of how hard it is for her.

So, thanks. And I like the site too - I'm sure she's seen it but I'll probably pass it on to her anyway.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
09:01 / 21.12.06
Yeah, it's a neat little analogy. I've currently got plenty-O-spoons, but have been through times in my life when they were in short supply, and it is indeed JUST LIKE THAT.
 
 
Hydra vs Leviathan
11:24 / 21.12.06
Hmmm. Well, as a disabled person myself, i'm not sure whether i like it... can see that it's useful for some, but to me there's something a little... "trivialising" might not be quite the right word, but perhaps something like that...

It seems to carry a bit of that (to me, culturally American, but maybe not identified as such by everyone) "let's come up with a slightly wacky, slightly silly way to describe something serious, so that people can be less serious about it" kind of vibe, or something...

I've heard of it before, and i do appreciate its usefulness for some people, just not sure it works for me. It seems to imply that there's one unit of "energy", that having any disability makes everything use more of, whereas for me with my various neurological differences/impairments, there are some things i can do, but with a little to a lot more effort than most people would need to do them, but also many things i'll simply never be able to do regardless of effort, and quite a few other things that actually take me less effort than an average person...

Interesting critique of the spoon thing here... (incidentally, IMO that blog is the best collection of writing about disability anywhere on the web, and possibly anywhere... I recommend reading it to, well, anyone, but especially anyone with any interest at all in mental disability, psychology or psychiatry)...
 
 
Twice
12:16 / 21.12.06
I think it resonates with my experience, perhaps, because the particular disabilities described in the original web site are broadly in line with my own. In fact, the illness is closely related to mine. I can appreciate the need to take the analogy and mould it into something more appropriate to one's own situation, as was shown in the link you provided.

I think there's a distinct difference between 'spoons' and 'coping techniques'. Someone with, say, a stable physical disability might be more able to plan and structure their life in ways that allow them to achieve some physical action. They might have a known 'income'. In the link provided by Natty, it is said that

One thing a friend with an unspecified autoimmune disease...pointed out, first off, is that you can be going through a day with nine spoons, and then suddenly you’re down to no spoons a few minutes later with no warning or ability to prepare yourself. She said there is an element of total randomness that the spoon theory doesn’t adequately capture.

This is true. Indeed, sometimes I can wake up the day after a perfectly acceptable day and find I simply have no spoons at all. Or wake up feeling full of spoons and find that the Spoon Exchange Market has gone tits-up and it costs all my spoons just to...whatever...get vertical. Likewise, I sometimes find bonus spoons in unexpected places.
 
 
Papess
12:29 / 21.12.06
Wow, thank you for this, Mordant. Not only does it help me, but my partner's sister has lupus and she lives their dad (who is also dealing with a disability - and quite well, to the amazment of his doctors), whom she takes care of. I am certain that she will appreciate this. I am going to pass this along to her.

Maybe she can get an extra spoon out of it for today.
 
 
Papess
12:33 / 21.12.06
It's always about cutlery with you, MC.
 
  
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