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We're excluded from the hippest in-jokes, to us the Late Shift starts at midday- we're the Barbeliods on the West Coast- we're mad as hell and we won't take it any more!
Hello, my name is Phex and I am on the left coast, Portland Oregon to be specific. For four years I have served this board with honor and dick jokes (mainly dick jokes) from what I assumed to be a permanent home in Norwich, but after my exile to Portland Oregon I have found that my position on the Earth has seriously curtailed my ability to bring you the wit and wisdom you crave.
A lesser man may cite your JEALOUSY as cause for my exclusion- after all, Portland has provided the world with most, if not all, of the awesomeness that distracts us from the impending robot apocalypse that will soon engulf us all, such as:
1) Sleater Kinney.
Before I issue my extensive enemies list, I want to give my fellow West Coasters a chance to make themselves heard- and, if necessary, to throw their tanned, supple bodies onto the machinery of oppression. Stand up and be counted my brothers and sisters! |
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