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At my advanced age (76 in the autumn, if the people here in the Twilight Home for the Criminally Bewildered don't poison me first - they think I don't know what they put in my meals, but I do know, yes I do, and if they carry on like this then I'm going have to think seriously about hiring a food-taster from one of those youth opportunity schemes that that Gordon Brown keeps on talking about on the television in my brain, I think they cost about £45 a week,) I ponder this issue almost constantly.
I quite like the idea of a sky burial, which I think is a custom that dates from ancient Tibet - basically, your corpse is taken up to a high, lonely place and left there to be stripped clean by carnivorous birds, hence all but the bones 'fly away into the air.' The appeal of this is that it would probably help fast-forward the grieving process - by the time the relatives had fought their way back down from the top of Ben Nevis or wherever, it seems an average-to-good bet that they'd be reasonably OK with having seen the last of the 'old bat, the twisted old reptile, the bloodsucking husk of a vampire that insisted on this nonsense as a part of the will in the first place' etc.
On the other hand though, the flesh-eating birds (vultures mainly, as I understand it,) are perhaps arguably more pro-active in Tibet - Are, say, the crows in the mountains of Snowdonia really going to be up to the job? And, maybe more pertinently, how much more time in purgatory (ball park figure at the moment, roughly ten thousand years,)would this type of shenanigan be likely to earn me in any case?
Questions, questions... |
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