Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Underground > Conversation >

The Parenting Thread

16:16 / 13.02.06

Okay, as I'm sure many of you are aware, I'm soon to be a dad. If fact, we're expecting the little fella any day now. So, I got to thinking, the challenges of parenthood are manifold, and the capacities of parents are limited - we should have a thread in which board members can ask questions pertaining to parenthood and child rearing, offer advice and support, and maybe have a bit of a bitch (from time to time).

So then, to get the ball rolling, what do other Barbeparents, and interested parties, think of the practice of giving Vitamin K (crap link, I'm afraid) to newborn, and young babies?

For those not in the know, babies have low levels of the vitamin, which is unfortunate as it's a key component in the blood clotting mechanism. Understandably most hospitals now tend to inject newborns with a Vitamin K booster. The worry for new parents is that some studies seem to show a link between Vitamin K and childhood leukemia.
The good news is that the most recent studies have failed to show any link, but the issue is still unresolved, which makes deciding on a course of action difficult.
At the mo' we are leaning towards giving him the injection - even if there is a link the chance of our baby developing leukemia in later life is still very low, but... It's still a slightly scary situation to be in.

I'm primarily intersted in how barbeparents and barbecarers cope with making decisions like this. How do you avoid guilt and worry? Is it possible?

I've got years of this kind of thing ahead, haven't I?

17:55 / 13.02.06

At a guess, yes. I don't really think there's any way to avoid feeling guilty or worried. Ya just gotta deal with it as best you can. That means talking about it to each other and other people (and so 'kudos' to you for starting this thread).

The best I can tell you about the Vitamin K thing is: find out as much as you can, talk to your doctor and go from there. And don't beat yourself up! All you can do is go by the best information you have available and make the decision that you think best benefits your baby. That's all any parent can ever do

Sorry, baby's fussing. I'll come back with more later if I can.

18:13 / 13.02.06

All you can do is go by the best information you have available and make the decision that you think best benefits your baby.

That's exactly what we're doing, it's just that it's so easy to start worrying irrationally - as I'm sure you're well aware.

19:30 / 13.02.06

Oh yeah.

There'll come a point for you one day where your baby will be coughing in it's sleep. Not waking itself up, but just having a good cough every couple minutes. And you'll worry. You'll lay there in bed, eyes wide open, and you'll worry. You'll have done everything you can do: Cough medicine, vaporizer running full blast in it's room, the works, yeah? Wooooorrry. Then a few minutes will go by. Then a few more. Then a few more. And the baby will not be coughing. And you know what? You'll worry. You'll worry cause the silence is worse than the icky-bad sounds, and you may even have to go check on the lil' tyke to make sure everything's a-okay. But you'll still worry.

Irrational? Hells yes. But that's the way it works. And it is damn easy to start. I think what's worked for me has been talking to my wife about my worries, being well-informed but not overly so (you can read too much about child care), remembering that my folks got through this parenting thing relatively well, and focusing on what I can do here and now. Doesn't mean I don't worry, of course, but I do okay in spite of it..

I hope this helps you more than it scares you, man. You're in for big things in the days and months to come , and I'm sure you'll navigate it all just fine.

20:52 / 12.09.06

How'dja go with the Vitamin K think, noss?

Story we heard was that it's a clotting assist, mainly, so what we've decided is to make the call on the day. we're giving birth at a birthing centre run by midwives, so they're not too interventionist and their main thing is skin-on-skin for parents right at the moment of birth, so they don't take the bub away to do tests n shit for a bit, that gives you time to make your own mind up. our thoughts are that if it's badly bruised by labour, then VK is a good idea, but if not, then not.

Same with a Hepatitis B shot that the Aust. govt is funding for all newborns - we've decided to eschew the jab for the newborn and deal with Hep B immunisation later on, but we have had to insist on no shot.

Fascinating how much jabbing and measuring they want to do with newborns. reminds me of the opening sketch from monty python's meaning of life.

What do I do?

Nothing dear, you're not QUALIFIED!

21:08 / 12.09.06

Same with a Hepatitis B shot that the Aust. govt is funding for all newborns - we've decided to eschew the jab for the newborn and deal with Hep B immunisation later on, but we have had to insist on no shot.

Yep, my partner (a midwife) thinks the hep b shot at birth is absolutely ridiculous. She's always trying to talk her patients out of it, but it's surprising how many of them go for it even when she tells them that it's an unnecessary extra dose, given to babies at a time when their chances of contracting hep b are ridiculously low (most newborns aren't shooting up or having sex!).

21:33 / 12.09.06

M, we had the same plan, unfortunately, our labour, she not so great, so we didn't think twice about the injection.

If you feel an urge to read more here's some info on the subject

Glad to hear you guys are going to get the old skin to skin treatment. It's pretty much standard practice over here these days (I think, anyone know otherwise?).