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Office politics

20:10 / 01.12.05

So, offices suck, and we all know that. They tend to be very dull places where people who don't much like each other are forced to gather and pretend to achieve Many Great Things, while earning filthy dirty money and frequently battling with boredom. Some people earn more than others, and some people are more pallypallychummychummy with those who decide about things like money than others. And so, the office because a damned hotbed of strategic wrangling - a hotbed, I tell you, of what can only be described as politics.

My office is pretty small and quaint, and so we like to keep the politics pretty clear and straighforward. Feudal, you might say. Or at least... we did. But all of a sudden, tempers are fraying in elegant demonstrations of the passive aggressive, and many many unsightly and stinky things are rumoured to be coming close to hitting fans up and down the building. Except of course, that won't happen, coz that was just a rumour that Jeff the photocopying wench started to stir up some drama.

Does the petty scrapping within the office drag you into its slimy lair, or do you rise above it all like some sort of zen hummingbird? Is it necessary to participate in order to survive (and get more of that dirty, filthy money)? And if someone in a superior position is coming dangerously close to bullying someone else as part of their own sinister strategem, should I be a good Boy Scout and go tell the teacher, or should I Have Words with the bully, such as I hear grown-ups do, or should I develop my own entirely separate tactics and start raising campaign funds Now?

Tell me about the silly silly rubbish that goes on in your office and make me feel better!

13:46 / 02.12.05

Not sure if I can add to this without sounding like I'm spouting passive-agressive bitchy complaints... oh, what the hell.

Things not said to a certain co-worker:

"Are you my boss? No? Then fuck off and take your contagion with you. I know it's hard for you to believe, but the project will not collapse without you. I've been doing this since before you arrived, I think I can handle releasing the project without you. In fact, I think I can do it better than you, because I spend my time doing the work instead of wasting the entire day in meetings that you weren't even invited to. And don't cry to me about having to work until eleven-thirty last night, it's not my damn fault that you wasted the entire day in meetings that you weren't even invited to."

"And another thing, your taste in desk music stinks!"

Whew. I needed to get that off of my chest.

14:46 / 02.12.05

See, I quite like office politics – in the same way that I like Politics politics. I enjoy the machinations, the alliance building, the scandal and the gossip. I like the soap opera of it all.

To be honest, I don’t engage in it much myself (because I’m not terribly good at it), and I think that distance makes it easier to enjoy as an observer. Naturally, there’s a nasty side, and it can be cruel in a Darwinian way. But the people who seem to prosper in particularly political office environments aren’t necessary the ruthless, aggressive, dick swingers. Success seems to favour those who are socially gifted, people who are good at identifying what motivates different individuals and can form alliances with lots of people (including those who don’t assert themselves politically). I find it hard not to admire people who are good at it.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

15:39 / 02.12.05

I tend to ignore it (except when I'm in a position to try and stop those below me getting fucked over). Which is either ironic because, or the reason why, I get trusted with so many work-related things I'm not technically supposed to know about by so many people, none of whom seem to realise that I don't actually care very much, and usually end up forgetting them anyway.

The "ignoring it" part is probably why it came as such a surprise when there was an actual physical fight in the office a couple of weeks back, though. Wish I'd seen that coming. I'd have chosen a better seat.

Mister Six, whom all the girls

02:11 / 05.12.05

After over ten years in the second oldest game in town I could write a book on office politics... and if I ever get the time off I will.

02:30 / 05.12.05

I like being the two-faced jackal. There's only one person at my work that am completely truthful and honest with. Everybody else can go fuck off, you know what I mean?

Mister Six, whom all the girls

02:33 / 05.12.05

... that's the last time I buy you coffee.

03:01 / 05.12.05

My power move is that I don't talk about my personal life at work. It's the equivalent of not letting yourself be photographed for fear of your soul getting captured. After my parents died, my boss asked me how my family was & I said, "Smaller."

09:27 / 05.12.05

I'm hoping that all the people in this thread work in the same office and are all secretly talking about each other on Barbelith. Now that would be office politics.

Mister Six, whom all the girls

11:34 / 05.12.05

I tried being private and it freaked people out. I think it was revenge when they were annoyed about my taking off time for my honeymoon.

Another job scolded me for taking off time for kidney stones and was frustrated that I then took a day off when my grandmother died because it was so soon after my illness. I guess I needed to schedule those things better.