Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

I feel stupid, do you?

charrellz

16:53 / 02.07.05

A home for things that make you feel dumb.

I just locked my keys in the car (haning in the ignition, of course) and I can't find the damn spare.

What have you done?

Fist Fun

17:20 / 02.07.05

I turned on the hob and put my electrical kettle on it for a second.

Very odd. Melted the bottom.

All Acting Regiment

17:58 / 02.07.05

You know those fairly large cartons of, well, in this case, orange juice? Yeah? Well, one of those, right in the dishwasher. Which was about to be switched on.

■

19:04 / 02.07.05

Claiming to the lady offering sunscreen: "No, I generally don't burn." Ow. ow. ow. It hurts when I blink.

Jimbo

19:35 / 02.07.05

What have you done?

I made the mistake of having mushy peas from the chippy last night!

All Acting Regiment

19:48 / 02.07.05

(Mushy peas are never mushy, are they? It's always hard bit hard bit damp bit. They're justdamp more than anything.)

Legba: Here! Cat! Try chasing my hand as if it's a mouse! Come on, chase it! (Legba conveniently forgets exposed, delicate human fingerflesh).

Legba: Ow! Fuck!

Jimbo

19:57 / 02.07.05

Mushy peas are never mushy, are they? It's always hard bit hard bit damp bit. They're justdamp more than anything.

They MUST be mushy! Hard bits are a big noOO-noOO! The mushier the better. I'm very fussy about my mushy peas.

It's just the day after!

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

21:19 / 02.07.05

I put my phone in the washing machine last week.

w1rebaby

22:35 / 02.07.05

I forgot to update one macro call in one program after I'd changed the way the parameters worked in the macro, so that it misclassified seventeen million records and then overwrote the evidence of it having done that, and made me spend twelve hours trying to work out what the fuck was happening.

(well, twelve pretty lazy timewasting hours)

that was quite dumb

I also had a Purdey's herbal energy drink when I *know* they fuck me up worse than anything.

paranoidwriter waves hello

23:14 / 02.07.05

Last week, I started running a bath and then popped downstairs to see my friend and neighbour in the basement, whereupon I became engaged in a juicy conversation. Half an hour later, I thought I heard dripping (I have a history of hearing problems), and I turned to my friend and asked:

"Are you running a bath upstairs?"

The realisation dawned on me as he shook his head calmly and said "No", and I bolted upstairs like an arse off a drawing pin.

Ever since, whenever I see him, the first thing he says is: "Are you running a bath?"

Yet another embarrassing entry in my catalogue of synaptic-misfires. Two more and I reckon I'll be up for a Darwin Award. (Note to self: sort - it - out!)

sine

04:49 / 03.07.05

Not just did, but: I once put my phone in the microwave, mid conversation, with the line, "Here, tell me what this sounds like." One second - just one second later - the phone made a terrible howl and a terrible acrid smell and then stopped. My mates still take the piss over that one. Lately I try harder to pay attention to my internal governors.

modern maenad

09:52 / 03.07.05

one eveing the police came to the door (routine enquiries, obviously). I had just had a bath, and answered the door in just a towel. One of the officers asked if I would like to get dressed before they asked me some questions, and I said "No, that's OK, just pretend we're at the beach"...

Add Your Reply