Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Underground > Conversation >

30 Things Everyone Should Know How To Do By Age 30.

Page: (1)2 3

14:28 / 13.04.05

Bored at work like me? Think of your 30. Here are mine:

1. Drive a car - including standard transmission.
2. Cook at least one meal (not spaghetti).
3. Write a decent resume.
4. Understand the rules of at least one sport.
5. Compose a grammatically correct sentence or two.
6. Use the proper form for a business letter.
7. Long division.
8. Not get ripped off by a mechanic/repairman.
9. Change a tire (I don't!)
10. Wash a load of laundry.
11. Build a fire.
12. Put out a fire.
13. Drive in bad weather (ie, what to do if you're hydroplaning or sliding on ice).
14. CPR (I need a refresher!)
15. The Heimlich Maneuver.
16. Send thank-you notes.
17. Read a map.
18. Make a cup of coffee (or tea if that's your bag).
19. Get around on public transportation.
20. Assemble, when Assembly Required.
21. Fix a paper jam in the printer.
22. Use an email program (including attachments and fwds).
23. Keep a promise.
24. Flip the circuit breakers when you blow a fuse.
25. Name at least 3 politicians currently in office.
26. Care for a child, a pet, or a houseplant.
27. Tip properly.
28. Get out of debt. (Ha! Just kidding.)
29. Take a compliment.
30. Tell a joke (at least one!).

Tryphena Absent

14:29 / 13.04.05

13. Don't panic.

14:48 / 13.04.05

26. Care for a child, a pet, or a houseplant.

I can care for a child and a pet, but give me a plant, even a cactus, and it is dead. I am desparately trying to correct this, BTW, with a little herb garden I am starting this spring.

14:54 / 13.04.05

Oh, man, tell me about it. My history of caring for houseplants is one long Sisyphean (ok, can't spell that) struggle.

15:13 / 13.04.05

31. Function or at least survive without electricity.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

15:18 / 13.04.05

(Disclaimer: This is nothing personal, ibis. I'm going to have a bit of a rant and the rant is suggested by the first item on your list--but it's not aimed at you.)

You know, the you-can't-drive thing pisses me off royally. I see it a lot, used as a kind of shorthand for "immature basement-dwelling freeloader." It's as if the ability to move a gas-guzzling metal box about is some kind of arcane rite of passage, a required module for joining the ranks of the grownups. Non-drivers are irresponsible, feckless. Losers.

So here's my thing you should know before you hit 30:

There are reasons for some people being unable to drive, even leaving aside the environmental and political issues. Sometimes people have eyesight that's not quite up to scratch, or some other kind of physical problem. For example, I'm epileptic. It is not only flat-out illegal for me to drive a car, it would be really fucking stupid. Fuck cars.

Oh yeah and thing two?: Yes, I CAN use a fucking VDU without immediatly coing into grand mal, thanks. Arseholes.

[/militant epo]

15:20 / 13.04.05

Oh! I have done that many times, Keggers. Albeit, in varying circumstances. One of which was at a monestary that limited it's generator use to about 2 hours a day.

15:22 / 13.04.05

MC - not taken personally. I thought someone might question that one at some point. I don't think everyone should drive all the time. The only reason it's on my list is I think if you're capable of driving, you should learn just for emergency purposes. I have actually been in a situation where my mom couldn't respond to an emergency bc the only car at the house was a stick shift and she'd never learned. However, not being able to drive for health or other perfectly understandable reasons would be clear exceptions to my little rule.

Tryphena Absent

15:22 / 13.04.05

I've been trying to care for the plant in the bathroom- it seems to be doing well but I suspect that's because everyone else has been caring for it too. I think maybe we're all watering it and it's finally getting the attention that it actually needed.

15:24 / 13.04.05

67. Ignore lists like these.

15:54 / 13.04.05

32. Multiple orgasms. Anywhere, anytime.

----

MC: I have a friend who is epileptic and should not drive but does. Insists on it. Just wrecked a car (I think her second, but am not sure.) Only a matter of time before she, like, hits other cars and not trees while having a mid-road grand mal.

16:10 / 13.04.05

1. ...including standard transmission. ...errr, can't drive a stick. I mean, I CAN, but not well. that is, I understand the basic idea and have done it, but it would be a bad idea to let me drive your stick shift car.
8. Not get ripped off by a mechanic/repairman. I sort of do this - by having lots of friends who know what they're doing.
11. Build a fire. have done, but it took far more tries than any reasonable person should have.
14. CPR I've been certified, but that was years ago - I doubt I could confidently manage this.
28. Get out of debt. depends on your definition - I'm in debt as far as I have a house and a couple of late bills (at any given time), but I have zero in credit card debt or other outstanding accounts.
29. Take a compliment. depends - sometimes I can, especially when I know it's a sincere, informed compliment.
30. Tell a joke and JUST the one!

also, I like grant's best.

16:57 / 13.04.05

Dang. I checked in here to see how much I need to learn in the next two months and it's not as much as I thought.

Does this mean I'm all done?

16:59 / 13.04.05

Well, I thought people might make their own lists.

The anywhere anytime multiple orgasms? If you can do that then you might very well be all done.

17:00 / 13.04.05

No, Sekhmet. Not if you want to see forty.

38. Learn to take criticism.

Not that I do that very well myself, and I am 35.

18:02 / 13.04.05

30.5
Get wonderfully, gloriously lost - on foot - in a strange city.

I love doing this and I can't recommend it highly enough. Of course, a certain amount of discretion and common sense is required.

18:20 / 13.04.05

And by thirty, one would expect to finally have some common sense.

Oh well, at least I have the multiple orgasm thing down.

19:57 / 13.04.05

Mordant:
You know, the you-can't-drive thing pisses me off royally. I see it a lot, used as a kind of shorthand for "immature basement-dwelling freeloader." It's as if the ability to move a gas-guzzling metal box about is some kind of arcane rite of passage, a required module for joining the ranks of the grownups. Non-drivers are irresponsible, feckless. Losers.

Right you are, Mordant! I´m over 30, and still don´t care to get a driver licence. There really is no point. I can walk to work in 15 minutes, public transportation in my town is very good, and I like to spend my money on other things than debt, insurance, gas, taxes, fees. Nothing immature about that, more like common sense.

And about the plants:
I got a plant as a gift many years ago. That plant demands almost zero care. I don´t know what it´s called, but it has very long meaty leaves. And it does not seem to miss water very much, if you forget to water it. For example, for a month.

20:06 / 13.04.05

Aloe? I've actually murdered one of those.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

20:08 / 13.04.05

Get a money plant, aka jade plant, aka tuppence tree. Needs zero care and if you knock a bit off it just grows into a new tree.

20:28 / 13.04.05

Oh for crying out loud! I think people should know how to operate a vehicle in case their best friend's arm gets hacked off by a rogue chainsaw, I don't think everyone has to get their CDL and buy a Hummer 2! Lord have mercy.

20:30 / 13.04.05

Does mold count as a plant?

Less searchable M0rd4nt

20:34 / 13.04.05

No, mold counts as a friend.

20:48 / 13.04.05

317. Know how to cultivate mold, to make home-made penicillin in an emergency, when your best friend's arm is hacked off by a chain saw.

21:34 / 13.04.05

Everyone should know how to handle a chainsaw. Not to hack off arms - that would be daft - to hack off zombie heads, duh.

21:55 / 13.04.05

Or, more generally

45. Defend self (and friends/family if possible) from zombies.

Lord knows I never would have made it to 30 without those skills.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

22:00 / 13.04.05

Yeah, fridge, but what if your arm was posessed and kept breaking plates on your head? Huh? What then? Where are you going to put the GUN if you don't cut off your ARM?

Der-brain.

23:07 / 13.04.05

I did this when I was thirty. Here's the list I wrote then, in 2003:

___

There seems to be a sudden spurt of lists concerning 'Things to do before you're 30'. I have noticed these lists on a television programme, in the newspapers and on the radio so I thought I'd make my own list (although mine will have to be 'Things To Do *When* You're 30,' since I currently am).

so:

Things To Do When You're 30

? Learn the names of all the British trees
? Learn the names of all the wildflowers
? Learn the names of all the wild birds
? Learn the latin names of all the plants in my garden
? Learn where all the countries are in the world
? Learn the names of all the Kings and Queens of England
? Learn the names of Henry VIII's wives Reciting divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived isn't acceptable.
? Learn how to play poker
? Learn how to read the Tarot
? Paraglide Once is not enough.
? Watch less television *Never* say 'what else can we watch?'
? Learn another language Minor abilities in French do not a) a good conversationalist make or b) count.
? Work out who I am.
? Work out what I want.
? Find a source of Sloe bushes so I can make Sloe Gin
? WRITE THE BOOK.
? Learn how to astral project
? Contribute to Barbelith instead of just lurking.
? Paint a picture a week.
? Be true to myself.
? Stop having conversations which go like this:

Me: Oh, I love winter trees, they're so beautiful.
Person who shall remain nameless: Mmm.
Me: You can see their skeletons, all the branches and twigs.
Person who shall remain nameless: Hmm.
Me: or like arteries and veins.
Person who shall remain nameless: Mmm.
Me: You can still see the shape of the tree though, even without the leaves, see?
Person who shall remain nameless: Mmm.

? Stop making lists and start doing the things on them instead.

___

I've done the main ones. I've stopped having those conversations, I am true to myself, I contribute to Barbelith, I know what I want, who I am and where there are Sloe bushes. And I can read the Tarot.

I think I've done well, considering.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

23:20 / 13.04.05

I guess I've done most of those... but 30 was a while back.

Hmm. The driving thing? No, it shouldn't be a necessity. And a driving license shouldn't be used as proof of ANYTHING except possibly age. They gave ME one. First thing you learn in school- passing a test in something is NOT the same as being good, or even necessarily competent at it.

Aaaannd... I don't really think my life would have missed out on much if I hadn't learned to drive. Well, except for owning that lovely Beetle (OLD- y'hear me? With the engine in the BACK, where it's supposed to be), but I rarely drove it, really.

I'd also add... (not that either are particularly recommended, mind you, but I'm kind of glad I did both of them... so YOU don't have to...)

-Necking half a bottle of cheap aftershave.

-Spending a night in hospital after being a victim of friendly fire (to be more exact- a brick in the back of the head thrown by some cowardly fuck who doesn't have the balls to run out in FRONT of the line that's protecting people before he starts on the coppers- and can't throw for shit) during a riot.

23:33 / 13.04.05

i would have thought 28 should be - get *into* debt.

constructive debt is where the money is, isn't it?

... now, what about those lists of things to do before you're 45??

09:05 / 14.04.05

? Stop having conversations which go like this:

Me: Oh, I love winter trees, they're so beautiful.
Person who shall remain nameless: Mmm.
Me: You can see their skeletons, all the branches and twigs.
Person who shall remain nameless: Hmm.
Me: or like arteries and veins.
Person who shall remain nameless: Mmm.
Me: You can still see the shape of the tree though, even without the leaves, see?
Person who shall remain nameless: Mmm.

Bloody hell, I was just trying to be a good listener. There was no need to stop hanging out with me.

17:55 / 14.04.05

I'm 17 and I know how to do 24 of those.
I guess that's a good thing?

Less searchable M0rd4nt

18:01 / 14.04.05

No, because one of us old gits will probably kill or incapacitate you out of resentment.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

20:53 / 14.04.05

Yes. "Despising the young" is first on the list of things you should know how to do AFTER you're 30.

21:03 / 14.04.05

Appreciating the fact that we don't live in the sci-fi world of Logan's Run is definately something to do after one is 30.

Page: (1)2 3