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Characters on the tube

 
  

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Jub
13:11 / 08.04.05
I use the tube alot to get around. There are invariably the same stereotypical types of people on the carriage, these include:

* the backpacker, with backpack, taking up the space of four people. (or 5 if they have the little front pack too!)

* someone who likes shit music, AND who has shit earphones.

* girl in sharp business suit and trainers.

* Tourist who gets on at Charing Cross to go to Embankemtn - or Leicestetr Square to Covent Garden etc.

Anyone else?
 
 
Unencumbered
13:40 / 08.04.05
There's always a couple who don't seem able to leave each other alone for more than ten seconds.
 
 
Smoothly
13:42 / 08.04.05
Child determined to keep his balance without holding on to anything, like a surfer.

Younger child who hasn't leaned the rules about eye contact.

Someone scanning the shoulder-line for a Metro.

Tourist who thinks the 'Open Door' button opens the doors.

(Can we extend this to the platform?)

Someone pointing out a mouse.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
13:43 / 08.04.05
* Care in the community schizophrenic who decides *I* am the most sympathetic looking fellow traveller who can help them ward off the little people who live in the air vents, that tell them to do bad things.

* Busker, with guitar, apologising for inconveniencing everybody, performing hideous rendition of 'Wonderwall' before collecting change in a dirty cap

* Eastern European lady with baby, no Wonderwall, doing same. (Northern Line)

* Deaf people clutching their ears in agony (Victoria Line)
 
 
Jub
14:01 / 08.04.05
Tourist who thinks the 'Open Door' button opens the doors. - Genius.

Similarly, tourists who try to cram on the train the moment the doors open rather than waiting for people to get off.

Also, out of towners who get a bit scared when the lights go out or the tube stops in a tunnel.
 
 
Triplets
14:01 / 08.04.05
The very quiet and carved marble-esque old couple

The chav using his and the seat opposite as a fucking lounger

The needlessly intense older businessman
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
14:02 / 08.04.05
Stupid fucking wankers judging everyone they look at so they can whine about it on the internet later.
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
14:06 / 08.04.05
In my experience it's not tourists who don't wait for people to get off, but impatient London workers who don't like waiting for anything at all...
 
 
A0S
14:10 / 08.04.05
Also people with kids who push their kids on as soon as the doors open and then go mad when said kids get pushed off or around.
 
 
Triplets
14:11 / 08.04.05
Group stereotype: Gang of girls and lads (no less than 12 at any given point) ranging from year 8 to year 11. Smuggled ale and the latest mobile phones and tracksuits as standard.
 
 
Ariadne
14:13 / 08.04.05
Petey, calm down - surely people are making observations about recognisable 'types', not 'whining'?

The tube is full of fascinating characters, why not have a look round and notice? Why is that so bad?
 
 
Ariadne
14:15 / 08.04.05
Okay, so in the time it took me to post that ...

but I don't think it's necessarily bad to caricature people/ describe types of people you see.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
14:16 / 08.04.05
The thread started out as mainly observational but has become increasingly sneery and 'why me'ish.
I've lived in London for 4 years and I've pressed the open door button before, thanks very much. Sometimes you actually need to.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
14:21 / 08.04.05
Sorry, it's just I've sworn a solemn vow to bring death to anyone who uses the word "chav".
 
 
Ariadne
14:24 / 08.04.05
ah - actually, fair enough, Petey, I'm with you on that. The word has been flying round my office this afternoon and my protestations greeted with confusion.
 
 
Jack Vincennes
14:29 / 08.04.05
Bizunth -And I still pretend I'm surfing on occasion, so 'Open Door' has got to be okay...

I like the tube slightly more than I did this time yesterday, as I got offered a seat when it was crowded in the evening. Which has never happened to me before, I must have looked particularly tired and sad. Or pregnant.
 
 
Loomis
14:30 / 08.04.05
The 'open door' button thing used to bug me no end! Are there really times when it's necessary Biz? I swear at every stop on every train on every day people (regular commuters not tourists) would be hammering the button as the train came to a stop as though it would make the doors open faster despite there being no evidence that this worked.
 
 
Jub
14:30 / 08.04.05
thread rotting aside...

the man who has to sit with his legs VERY wide apart.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
14:32 / 08.04.05
Sometimes the doors don't actually open. I've seen it happen! It's real!
I also wear headphones (at a reasonable volume), surf, point at mice, and enjoy a busker or two, my favourite being a rather stunning performance of 'Ashes to ashes'.
 
 
Ariadne
14:34 / 08.04.05
Loomis - yes, when it's cold and the train is quiet, sometimes the driver doesn't open all the doors, and they only open if you press the button. Spot who used to live out in the sticks...
 
 
Loomis
14:36 / 08.04.05
I blame Bizunth and Ariadne for all the problems on the tube. Lynch 'em I say - it's gone on long enough!
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
14:45 / 08.04.05
(BTW I am impatient Londoner who doesn't like waiting for anything at all - apols if I sounded whingey above)
 
 
Smoothly
14:50 / 08.04.05
Yeah Bizunth (and any others), just to be clear, I wasn't sneering at people who press that button, or for that matter kids who stare at me or 'surf' through starts and stops, or people who look for spare Metros or draw people's attention to mice. In fact, I rather enjoy all those things.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
14:54 / 08.04.05
Offtopic: I've given up on protesting about the word "chav", and have decided instead that, since it is clearly such a wonderful term, it should have its franchise expanded. Right now, I have decided that anyone without a degree from Oxford or Cambridge, at least one parent with a degree from Oxford or Cambridge and a proper pair of lace-up leather shoes is a great honking worthless chav. This has unfortunately rather forestalled my attempts to popularise the term "attack nouv", used to describe anyone who has no problems with the elements of social and economic mobility that have allowed their family to improve their own lot, but feels that it's time to get rigorous about class divisions again now that advantage has been gained.

Ontopic: In my experience, at least of myself, people who press "open door" are generally people who are used to catching trains as well as tubes and are short of sleep. And I always get happy when I see Tube mice. They're unavoidably cheering things, being as they are tiny and a bit like shrews.

As for characters - how about the inexplicably early drunken group? Usually two people, about 7 or 8 o'clock, who give every impression of being utterly blootered despite also being apparently dressed for the office.
 
 
sleazenation
15:17 / 08.04.05
I'm not sure why, but in my experience drunk people tend to vomit on trains more often than the tube... Not sure why that is...


Anyhow there will always be someone on the tube reading the popular paperback of the day - years ago it was the beach, more recently harry potter books and Mr Nice but at the moment Dan Brown's work is winning. Winning everything except praise and prizes as great literature...
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
15:20 / 08.04.05
Do what I do. Lean over and tell them that the Holy Grail is actually Mary Magdalene, and she's buried under the Louvre.
 
 
Papess
15:34 / 08.04.05
...along with Jimmy Hoffa.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
15:50 / 08.04.05
And, when my plan is complete, Dan Brown.
 
 
Papess
15:51 / 08.04.05
Here in Montréal on our Métro there are a lot of homeless people taking shelter. It has become a concern for the Métro authorities. It is a shame it hasn't become a concern for a more benevolent agency.

There are also the Métro cops for a stereotype, of which there are breakdowns of said stereotype.

Then there are the punks hanging around, skipping class and smoking pot in some areas they might get away with it, and scribbling their tags all over the platforms and car windows.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
16:10 / 08.04.05
I can see the thread's moved on, but just for the record I wasn't actually sneering or whining about the mentally disturbed (anecdotal), buskers (there are good ones, who refuse to play 'Wonderwall') or the Lady of the Northern Line. And the Victoria Line really is very fucking loud. Pain Threshold. I read somewhere it actually far exceeds Health & Safety standards which councils are on like a rash at gigs, concerts and parties etc.
 
 
Katherine
16:42 / 08.04.05
A group of school children with stressed teacher and assistant, not seeing so many of them now with the whole 'it's not my fault I'm going to sue' culture.
 
 
charrellz
17:23 / 08.04.05
Well, I don't live in your fancy England place, but we've got a commuter train type thing here in Dallas. We've got most of the same types, but one more: the couple arguing loudly in a language you can't understand.

[rot]
Dan Brown's work is winning. Winning everything except praise and prizes as great literature...
I went to a lecture by Dr. Elaine Pagel, and she spent the first five minutes of the lecture making jokes about Dan Brown. I was overjoyed.
[/rot]
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
17:35 / 08.04.05
I am 50% of the couple who argues loudly in a language ect.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
17:46 / 08.04.05
One that I see around here a lot: Peones on their way to work, lugging around a heavy toolbox, a bucket and various bits of bricklaying equipment around on a trolley.
 
 
Mourne Kransky
19:12 / 08.04.05
I heard Iris Murdoch interviewed on the radio when I were but a lad and she said she liked to sit on the Circle Line and go round and round for hours, watching the people, writing observations, perfecting a perplexing paragraph. Not being a great philosopher and novelist, I haven't that excuse, but I do enjoy surrepticious surveillance of my fellow passengers. But never on the Circle Line. It is evil. That's why it's yellow on the tube map.
 
  

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