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I just buried my dog

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

09:05 / 06.01.05

Oh well.
After months of procrastinating, I finally buried little Biscy's ashes in the local cemetery this morning, and planted a tree for her.
It's a nice tree- some kind of conifery evergreen thing, I think, and it's next to a nice flat gravestone where I can sit and have a spliff and a beer when I want to, and where it should get plenty of light. All in all, I think she'd have liked it.

But holy fuck do I feel weird.

Loomis

09:14 / 06.01.05

That sounds perfect.

She lived a good life, surrounded by loving friends, she went out in a pirate flag, and now she has a spot where she can be fondly remembered.

I'd be happy if my life could be described like that.

pointless and uncalled for

09:47 / 06.01.05

I'm not suprised that you feel wierd. I'd be worried if this were something that you were used to.

Well done.

alas

10:12 / 06.01.05

I lost a dog and a cat this year, Stoatie, and it's amazing to me how I had to grieve for them. But your burial spot sounds perfect. We still have my dog's ashes on a bookshelf in the other room. I'm not sure what to do with them, but the crematorium put them in a tiny little teak box with her name on it, and it's really pretty. I kinda like having her there.

But closure? I agree--bollocks.

bjacques

12:27 / 06.01.05

She was a great girl, and if there's anything a dog loves it's a tree! I'll raise another pint with Laura and Axel tonight.

Spaniel

12:36 / 06.01.05

Heart goes out to you, Stoatie. I lost a favourite cat a couple of years ago - needless to say, he still lurks in every shadowy corner of my Mother's house.
Although I did get some sense of finality when we buried him, I felt more bewildered than anything else, a feeling somewhat augmented by the incredible power of rigor mortis.

What was once Dennis was now a cat-shaped plank of wood.

Brigade du jour

13:34 / 06.01.05

Another big hug coming atcha from the Manor Park massive, which is me.

Papess

13:43 / 06.01.05

I never know what to say in circumstances of death. I feel very awkward and fear I might say something that will just come out all wrong. So, maybe just some huggles and to simply say, I think what you have done for Biscuits is quite beautiful, Stoats.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

18:47 / 06.01.05

Thank you all... I've been (and still am) a bit tearful on and off all day, but I went to the movies this afternoon which is always the best therapy, and really took my mind off things (and stopped me drinking, which was also helpful) for a couple of hours.

Lilly Nowhere Late

20:06 / 06.01.05

Big, big love Stoatie. You have done the right things.

■

22:24 / 06.01.05

I rememeber when my Grandad died about 12 years ago I hardly felt a thing. When my dog went a week later, the world collapsed for a while. Even though we have a new dog, she's no compensation for that big stupid fat lovely bundle of fur. Chin up Stoatie, with an owner who cared for her as much as you seem to have done, she must have had a hell of a good little doggy life. Be proud of yourself.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

08:55 / 08.01.05

Just visited her for the first time, which was quite sad.
But last night's high (and wonderfully spooky-sounding) winds don't seem to have damaged the tree any (which I was worrying about while lying in bed)- it seems to have lots of prtoection where it is, which is good. A bit too muddy to sit and have a beer today, though. (Also a bit too early.)

Bill Posters

14:03 / 11.01.05

Closure, schmosure, just you take care old bean.

ONLY NICE THINGS

14:46 / 11.01.05

Hug, stoats. As Bill says more eloquently, closure isn't quite maybe how bereavement works. There's part of you that always misses somebody... it's just that missing comes to mean different things and feel different ways over time.

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