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The topic of zombie biology spontaneously arose, with no prompting from me, today over dinner at a friend's house. (Thanks, synchronicity!) Some decent theories arose, largely from observations of zombie behavior and the assumption that zombies don't engage in anything 'just because'.
Clearly, zombie brains are important, or a headshot wouldn't matter. It is generally supposed that much of the higher brain functions shut down, leaving just enough to power the muscles and drive your basic eating instincts. But still, even a brain running on idle needs a fair amount of energy, and something to replace used up neurotransmitters and whatever else splashes around in a healthy brain. We hypothesized that the source of both this energy and neurochemicals are the human braaaaainss that zombies are known to be such connoisseurs of. (I think I've read this elsewhere but I have no idea where.)
The muscles aren't running at full capacity either. Not much in the way of quick movements, and we don't need as much waste removal from the muscles because zombies don't feel the pain of lactic acid build-up. But because Galvani's frog leg presumably only worked for a finite number of twitches, there must be some sort of replenishment. Here's my favorite part of the theory: instead of having a beating heart to circulate blood, the zombie relies on shambling to move blood about the extremities (and perhaps chewing and moaning to move nutrients directly from the mouth and throat to the brain). It's not nearly as efficient as a heart, but as noted above, it doesn't need to be.
This leads to a couple of interesting possibilities. First of all, a zombie actually needs its blood. But since there is no beating heart, hacking bits off a zombie isn't a serious problem (I mean, for the zombie), because it's just going to leak instead of spraying out. A non-leaky zombie would be good to go for a good long time. Furthermore, if shambling is a necessary part of zombie circulation, they are like sharks: they must move constantly to continue functioning. Though, if they're not moving, they're not building up muscle waste products, so maybe they're not like sharks. Damn, I liked that part.
Note, though, that we were working on the assumption that zombies do not last indefinitely. We were mostly trying to think up ways that a zombie would last more than a couple of days... with the above, a zombie could maybe last for several weeks, before rot and limb loss destroyed too many of the few systems that a zombie really does need. |
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