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I'm so glad that you asked, since this is one of my areas of intense interest and expertise. If you follow these fourteen steps, you will bring any woman to a white-hot super orgasm within ten minutes.
1) Make sure that her genital region is naked. This is surprisingly important.
2) Flick your tongue around. A good first step would be to write your name on her crotch with your tongue, like you're signing an autograph or a check. This is very hot, and it's good for you psychologically, because you're marking your territory.
3) Pause. Take a deep breath, and then exhale directly into the vaginal cavity.
4) Look up to her. Make eye contact and wave 'hello.'
5) Insert one finger into her. Leave it there for at least two minutes. This creates a "sustained sensation." Do not move the finger even a little bit, because this will change the equilibrium of her genital region.
6) Make some kind of witty remark to lighten the mood. You should improvize, but do try to keep the joke relevant to the situation.
7) Find the clitoris. This should be located somewhere between the vulva and the cervix. It might be best to just wag your tongue around, you're bound to get it.
8) If you've found the clitoris, pause and count to ten.
9) After you've counted to ten, place your mouth directly over the clitoris, and begin to hum or sing a jaunty little song. The clitoris is extremely sensitive to sound, but don't get too loud or you will hurt the clitoris and fun time is OVER. It's best to hum an upbeat melodic number, since female genitalia tend to dislike dirges. I don't know why, bro. Vaginas are weird.
10) Take another break. This is a good time for a mid-sex snack.
11) Time for the lightning round! Flick your tongue around like crazy. Make noises; she will love this. Imagine that you are the Cookie Monster and that her vagina is full of yummy cookies. Nom nom nom!
12) Put your hands up over your head and make some wild gestures. This is good for the mood, and to non-verbally express "look ma, no hands." Very impressive!
13) Look at your watch. Have ten minutes passed? If so, move on to the next step. If not, keep going. You're almost there, dude.
14) Look up and check to see if she's done. If you've done your job right, she should be. Women appreciate men who are verbal, so feel free to ask. Example: "Hey, am I done yet? Can I stop now?"
Good luck, bro! |
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