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No one?!
Sarge: ...Lopez, bring up the vehicle. May I introduce our new light reconnaissance vehicle...it has four inch armor blading, mag buffer suspension, a mounted machine gunner position and total seating for three. Gentleman! This is the M12LRV! I like to call it the Warthog.
Simmons: Why warthog, sir?
Sarge: Because M12LRv is too hard to say in conversation, son.
Grif: No, but why warthog? I mean, it doesn't really look like a pig.
Sarge: Say that again?
Grif: I think it looks more like a puma.
Sarge: What in Sam hell is a puma?
Simmons: You mean like the shoe company?
Grif: No, like a puma. It's a big cat, like a lion.
Sarge: You're making that up.
Grif: I'm telling you, it's a real animal!
Sarge: Simmons, I want you to poison Grif's next meal.
Simmons: Yes sir!
Sarge: Look. See these two tow hooks? They look like tusks. And what kind of animal has tusks?
Grif: A walrus.
Sarge: Didn't I just tell you to stop making up animals?
And...
Church: All right, that's it. I've had it. Rookie, you stay here. Me and Tucker will head through the teleporter, we'll cut him off at the pass.
Caboose: Right.
Church: Tucker, you ready? Let's go.
Tucker: There is no way I'm going through that thing.
Church: Tucker, we don't have time for this. Why would they give us a teleporter if it doesn't work?
Tucker: I don't know. Why would they give us a tank that no one can drive?
Church: We already tested the teleporter, remember?
Tucker: We threw rocks through it!
Church: Yeah and? So what? The rocks came out the other side, didn't they?
Tucker: Yeah, but they were all hot and covered with black stuff.
Church: So I guess this is what this is all about then...you're afraid of a little black stuff.
Tucker: Yes, I am. I am afraid of black stuff.
Church: *points gun at Tucker* Tucker, I almost hate to do this to you.
Tucker: You wouldn't.
Church: You know, I look at it this way: Either A) we go through there and get the flag back, or B) We stay here and I get to kill you. Either way I win.
Tucker: For the record, I want you to know, rocks aren't people.
Church: Duly noted. Now get in there!
Tucker: Crap! All right, one, two...*runs through teleporter*
Caboose: He didn't come out the other side.
Church: Yeah...I've uh...I've decided I'm not going to use the teleporter. Okay rookie, you stay here...I'll be back with the flag.
Hee! |
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