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My mouth hurts

19:16 / 11.11.04

So having been suffering recently with an abscess and a cracked filling I got myself to the dentist today (after a week of antibiotics to reduce the swelling) and had a tooth pulled out.
Being a big girls blouse when it comes to the dentist I told him to be gentle with me and after the injection to numb me, he told me that it all looked quite easy and not to worry. Very reassuring thankyou Mr Dentist.
Once I'd gone numb and he came to start pulling he asked if I could feel anything and when I said no, he told me that was good because he'd actually lied before and it looked really complicated! Of course, that relaxed me no end and the whole thing was a breeze.

Apart from the bit where it was actually really bloody painful despite the injection and I thought he was gonna yank my whole head off!

The tooth finally came out after about 5 minutes and he said how surprised he was at how easily it had come and that it hadn't broken off in my mouth and been more complicated. Nice to know he was confident anyway...

So now, it's a number of hours later and I have a big gory hole in my mouth which hurts like a bastard and I'm having a little sulk because of it.

Anybody got any really good dental horror stories to make me realise my trauma is in fact negligible and I should in fact be pleased with how well it went?

21:37 / 11.11.04

Had a wisdom tooth a while ago - the dentist had a bit of trouble getting it out, so had to put his knee on my chest and wrench it out. It was a strange moment where I was completely detatched from procedings due to the needle.

21:42 / 11.11.04

I had a molar crack in half when I was eating a packet of cheese & onion crisps a couple of weeks ago. That was a happy-making experience.

hanabius yamamura

21:51 / 11.11.04

... many many moons ago, before entering the world of psychiatry under the ever teaching eye of mr Xoc, i worked as a student nurse in plastic surgery theatre ... amongst the many unusual things that got done in the place, they used to do dental stuff once a week - complicated stuff like really impacted wisdom teeth that were burrowing under other teeth etc ... anyway, as a student, i had the lovely job of holding peoples heads ( literally a firm hand over each ear ) as they lay unconscious on the operating table, while a small hirsute dentist went at them , literally, with a small sterilised hammer and chisel ... ... to this day, i can never forget the fact that the sound reminded me of golden delicious apples smashing onto concrete from a great height ... didn't help my fear of dentists one bit ...

Cloned Christ on a HoverDonkey

22:16 / 11.11.04

I missed an appointment last week due to bad traffic and had to pay £15 for the privilege of making another one. And they can't fit me in again until next February, which leaves me with the most unaesthetic looking incisor this side of Birmingham for the next four months. Grrrr.

I know, hardly a dentistry blood-fest, but it definitely fucked me off good and proper.

07:13 / 12.11.04

I once had the 'flu, and got up in the middle of the night delerious with a fever, ate two entire boxes of Rivita (while singing the Vitawheat jingle) and threw up out my nose. The dental angle is, I was wearing a plate and nearly lost it down the toilet. Then I sang the sad version of the Vitawheat jingle on the way back to bed.

Dances with Gophers

18:46 / 12.11.04

A few years ago I had an abscess followed by the root canal treatment. A few months later the whole side of the tooth came away to be replaced by a gold cap insert thingy. But oh no this was not the end of the story - the abscess got re-infected. This lead to a visit to a consultant at the local hospital (after the antibiotics had killed off the infection) and to a year on the waiting list. The operation was under a general anasthetic, they made a hole in the jaw cleaned out the absecess and re-filled it. The also gave me a painkiller suppository whilst I was unconscious, I think the worst thing is kept dreaming I was at work! So if I ever get another abscess the tooth is coming out!
Hope you feel better soon.

20:35 / 12.11.04

An ex-girlfriend of mine once had to get both of the wisdom teeth in her lower jaw taken out. Believe it or not, the teeth had somehow managed to start growing sideways, from the back of her mouth to the front, underneath the gumline.

The dentist, she said, had to more or less had to dynamite her face to dig the teeth out of her jaw. She said that even he looked alarmed at the extent of the work required.

I saw her a couple of hours after the procedure and she was still weeping, even packed to the gunnels with painkillers. Her face had swollen to Zeppelin proportions that would have put the Marlon Brando of The Godfather to shame. She was in total agony and stayed that way for at least a week. It was horrible.

It did nothing to quell my fear of the dentist, I tell you.

Morlock - groupie for hire

09:15 / 13.11.04

My jaw is too small for the full set of adult teeth. So I had to have a whole bunch of milk teeth and a couple of permanents pulled over a couple of appointments. Highlight was having 4-6 pulled in one session (that's at least a dozen separate injections, folks!), while suffering from what turned out to be acute appendicitis.

Boy what fun.

23:48 / 14.11.04

I've also had the unpleasant experience of having two wisdom teeth removed. I could barely open my mouth and it hurt anytime I tried to chew anything.
I lived of tiny portions of yoghurt for several days.

00:51 / 15.11.04

during my mis-spent youth (i was about 14), after a usual night of binge drinking, i tried to ride my bicycle home and somehow managed to throw myself face first into the road. god knows how, but i more or less bit the road. my friends said they came and picked me up of the road and there was blood everywhere and i was laughing madly. the next morning i looked in the mirror and just had two little points where my two front teeth used to be. when i checked out the scene there was a little line of ground up teeth in the road. i was too drunk at the time to feel any pain and it didnt hurt the next day...until i went to the dentist to get it seen to. my god, he used some electric file thing to get rid of the sharpness of the fragments that were still left in my gums. there must have been exposed nerves or something, it hurt like a motherfuck. worst thing is the caps they stuck on look no-where near as good as my original teeth. maybe i can afford to get good ones one day. i still kept drinking heavily after that too. what an idiot. alcohol has been the only drug ive ever had a real problem with. thankfully those days are behind me now. thank god for cannabis and the odd dosage of shrooms, certainly helped me to see things in a more sane light.

23:20 / 18.11.04

Thanks guys, that helped. It's now a week later and the hole is healing up niceley although I'm getting loads of food stuck in it all the time which is kinda annoying.
But yeah, your horror stories worked and I realise that I got away lightly all things considered so I carry on a happy little bee.

01:47 / 19.11.04

My horror story is less about the removal and more about the eating afterward.

Four wisdom teeth out in one sitting-no problem, I was unconscious the whole time. I remember the anesthetic tap being slid into my arm, the dentist coming at me with the gas mask, me asking him if he'd ever seen "Brazil," giggling...

Waking up the next day with holes in my jaw. Felt like shit, but I don't think I could have dealt with the whole experience.

So, the tragedy of it all:

There was a burger joint, Bond's BBQ, that made the world's best hamburgers. Each one took a half hour to make and bust have been hand spun from purest fold and fairy-dust. Truly, no hamburger has ever been able to compare.

About a week after I got the teeth out I was hungry for one of Mr. Bond's burgers, but the holes where my teeth had been hadn't properly healed.

Every bite of that exquisite burger was agony.

Bond's BBQ closed before my mouth fully recovered, and my final and enduring memory of Mr. Bond's creations is of pain.

20:03 / 19.11.04

Always general, never local, fork the risks, you cant recieve the pain which is good, but you are aware of the pulling, cutting and drilling, which rilly rilly
int.

Let 'em knock you out, so long as you have a loved one to bring you 'round.