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A poem that is twenty six lines long

 
 
Ender
04:19 / 06.09.04
An alliance with amnesty,
Bring me back the bold the
Chosen the chaste,
Daring to destroy,

Envied and earnest; enraged

Find me the few, Faltered for freedom,
Guard that gate, and

Hate the hand that holds you
Inside insanity
Jailed by your judgments

Kamikaze kindness,
Lost, and lifeless,
Mundane Melodramatic, molested,

Narcotic and nothing noble,
Opting for oppression,
Pursuing pain,
Quietly quoting
Relishing, and revealing resistance.

Soulless, soured to sacredness,
Tall and tuned,
Used and understood
Variables, vulnerable.

Wisdom, wasted
Xeroxed
Yoked,
Zig-Zaged, and zoned out.
 
 
flufeemunk effluvia
05:07 / 06.09.04
If it rhymed it would be Doctor Seuss. Totally.

But it doesn't rhyme.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
07:55 / 06.09.04
I think I'd probably start by asking what this poem is for. There's a broad theme - bit of rebellion, bit of angst - but that function does not seem connected to the form (twenty-six lines, each starting with a different sequential letter of the alphabet). What's it for? What does it do?
 
 
We're The Great Old Ones Now
08:12 / 06.09.04
Okay, picky thing: in the first verse, you've put a comma at the end of a line which doesn't seem to need one.

Otherwise: it sounds pretty. It's got so many good words and alliterations in it that I'm not sure it means anything beyond a kind of tone. Is that what you wanted?
 
 
Ender
14:49 / 06.09.04
Tone, yes thats it. I tried to keep it all flowing, like an old man in a nursing home, with illusions of grandure, that cant stay on topic, and almost makes sense if you listen closely enough, almost.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
15:41 / 06.09.04
OK... so what's it for? Just a collection of semi-meaningful words, without rhyme, reason or rhythm? What does it do?
 
 
Alex's Grandma
17:20 / 06.09.04
Yeah, I've read that a couple of times, and while to a certain extent literalism's the enemy of poetry, I'm still a bit unclear as to what point you were trying to get across, exactly.
 
 
Ender
17:52 / 06.09.04
Just fun really, I wanted to see if I could write something useing all the letters of the alphabit, in order. I guess now the job will be to go backa and clean it up a bit, and bring it all together.
 
 
We're The Great Old Ones Now
18:18 / 06.09.04
Oh, crickey.

Here's a thought: having done that, ditch the acrostic or whatever you call it, and work with the poem.
 
 
Billuccho!
19:17 / 06.09.04
"Kamikaze kindness" is now the phrase of the day. It sounds so... neat.
 
 
Jack Fear
13:45 / 07.09.04
Function

No good in itself,
the formal exercise: but
what you do with it.
 
 
Charlie's Horse
01:14 / 09.09.04
What's the title? "Alphabet of Angst?"
 
  
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