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Hmmmm...Always wondered how they squared that whole 'there are only three degrees' thing with the number of people claiming to be thirty-third degree etc, now it seems obvious - although you know someone was having a laugh when he decided to refer to the post-third-degree branches as 'side orders'. I can imagine the Order of the Onion Ring, the Order of the Curly Fries, the Order of the Garlic Bread...but I digress.
Also like the idea of the Order of the Secret Monitor - both because it gives me a wonderful image of a komodo dragon in a mask, and also because I imagine a secret monitor who would function like the milk monitor at school - giving out all the secrets for everyone to use.
'Okay, here are today's secrets, everyone. Timmy, you get the secret of why we really went into Iraq. Marie, you get the secret of where Osama bin Laden really is. Sarah, you get the secret of how to increase your penis size with my all-natural pill (heh heh); Jed, you get the secret of exactly why Tom and Nicole broke up; Frank, you get today's super-secret name of God - now remember you can only use that once, then we have to change it. Yesterday's name of God was 'Gooogawoo', by the way...yes, with three o's, then two...just one a, that's right. So if anyone tries using that today, they're not in the order, okay? Okay. And remember, kids - no telling!' It would be great. I wanna be the Secret Monitor.
Serious question, though - does joining some side orders prevent you from joining some of the others? Do some side orders have feuds going, and stuff? Just wondering. |
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