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Im a freakin`genius, I just have to get my shit together and all..

 
 
agvvv
15:59 / 21.04.04
Well, I will have to admit. I do.(`til I actually start writing that is, but I tell you, as soon as I get my shit togheter..) So, who else is a genius? Any takers?
 
 
Nobody's girl
16:23 / 21.04.04
I am. Or at least, when I'm 50 odd I'll maybe feel I have enough wisdom and experience to bother imparting.
 
 
Tzara
17:19 / 21.04.04
as soon as i buy a trilby i'll be in business...

i have a performance atist friend who is trying to create and market genuis if any ones interested...
 
 
Char Aina
17:32 / 21.04.04
well, my IQ is over 150, and that used to be the mensa standard of genius.

oh, and i like jazz.

yes, even the wierd stuff.
 
 
Char Aina
17:34 / 21.04.04
oh and dude?
I just have to get my shit togheter
classic.


no diss, i spelt my name wrong on an intelligence test once.
 
 
Ex
18:14 / 21.04.04
I use most of my vast brane covering up my own organisational mistakes. If I could just get organised, I'd grind puny humanity beneath my sensible heel (in a non-hierarchical, pluralist kind of way.)
 
 
kosmonaut
18:36 / 21.04.04
I used to think I was a genius, then I read somewhere that people who were big babies have a head-start, brains-wise, as kids, which evens out in adulthood.

I weighed 10lbs 4oz when I was born, so now I'm worried that my early brilliance is wearing off with every passing day.

It's a terrible burden...
 
 
w1rebaby
19:18 / 21.04.04
I think this all the time. It's so much easier than actually, y'know, doing anything. "Oh, I'm really clever and creative and stuff, it's just that I'm so fucked up I never produce anything".

It's Creation Lite, all the self-validation, none of the effort. If only I could get rid of this aftertaste of bollocks.
 
 
agvvv
09:55 / 22.04.04
Aftertaste of bollocks? Try some beer, works as a charm..
 
 
Ganesh
10:07 / 22.04.04
Ahh, but the 'genius' part lies in actually converting the potential into tangible. "I coulda been a genius contender" impresses no-one, Tefal-Boy.
 
 
agvvv
10:26 / 22.04.04
Damn it. But really, Im like a cocoon..
 
 
deja_vroom
10:58 / 22.04.04
whoa dude! that's just disgusting.
 
 
XXII:X:II = XXX
16:25 / 22.04.04
I think this all the time. It's so much easier than actually, y'know, doing anything. "Oh, I'm really clever and creative and stuff, it's just that I'm so fucked up I never produce anything".

That's precisely it. Probably one of the worst things that was done to me in my developmental years is that I was TOLD I was a genius. What's a 7 year old supposed to do with that information? Even a 7 year old genius?

Well, I'll tell you what I did with it: I just didn't give a fuck anymore. If I'd achieved that without trying, "logic" would seem to dictate that the same strategy would yield further riches.

That's not exactly true. As soon as it was adequately determined to the overeager adults in my life that I met those qualifications, zip, right out of public school, plonk, right into private. (I think that's the inverse for you Brits; stay with me here.) Nothing like removing a child from the environment in which he was thriving and thrusting him into one that's completely hostile to kill the spark of a joy for learning, or life itself, for that matter. Then, of course, the reinforcement that one ought to be doing better than one is, along with a slew of other backhanded insults and constant blows to one's self-esteem, has the same effect of plenty of rain but no sunshine on a plant: it may live, but not well.

So in the intervening 21 years I do believe that while I can still outtalk and outthink Joe Lunchpail, my behavior does little to suggest that I'm much more than slightly above average. I'd say the prime motivation behind my interest in things like NLP and magick and the like are borne out of a need to somehow segregate myself now from some truly tragic moments in my personal history, which quite obviously has not yet taken. We all have these personal tragedies, points at which had things gone otherwise we'd be our idealized selves (my own even functions as my fictionsuit); mine, no doubt, are probably on the less atrocious end of the spectrum of possibilities. But no matter how much I may better myself from this point on, there will always be that formative best-case scenario that was aborted in the 32nd trimester that I'll never get back. Many people wander through life wondering where it all went wrong; for me, it's far worse to know exactly when and where and how it did.

"I used to be a genius... but now I'm STUPID!" -- Brak

VJB2
 
 
Smoothly
16:40 / 22.04.04
Oh the humanity!
 
 
XXII:X:II = XXX
16:52 / 22.04.04
I did say that my own disappointments are solely my own. If you're going to be a snarky bitch about it, keep walking.
 
 
Smoothly
16:59 / 22.04.04
Sorry VJB2. 'Probably one of the worst things that was done to me in my developmental years is that I was TOLD I was a genius' does rather invite just a teensy bit of ribbing. I meant it to be good humoured.
 
 
XXII:X:II = XXX
17:12 / 22.04.04
I'd intentionally left out a good bit about my dysfunctional family history and the physical and emotional abuse that came packaged with this shift, too, so it's not as though I'm without perspective here, even within my own reality tunnel. I'm attempting to not be all "one day you will ache like I ache" about this, but it's not exactly light-hearted fare, either. Context: choose it well.
 
 
The Apple-Picker
17:26 / 22.04.04
Bah. I feel ya, VJB2. When I was a kid, I was in this special program, and wouldn't you know it, almost all the kids that came out of it ended up being some of the most pathetic underachievers I've ever seen. "We're smart, and that's enough for us!"

It probably saved me, though. My parents thought I was plagued with learning disabilities before the program called them about me. My grades had been terrible, you see.
 
 
---
18:40 / 22.04.04
Many people wander through life wondering where it all went wrong; for me, it's far worse to know exactly when and where and how it did.

It hasn't all gone wrong, you haven't lost your chance, your still alive with a chance to do something, (something that you may not even be aware of yet) so how could it have?

Get back up off the damn floor!
 
 
---
18:42 / 22.04.04
Get back up off the floor and fight, dammit! YOUR defeating yourSELF!!!
 
 
40%
20:18 / 22.04.04
(something that you may not even be aware of yet)

Hmm...(scratches head. For a long time)

As Ganesh says, the only way to avoid being a prick is to actually achieve something rather than talking about what you could have achieved. That's almost worse than being a regular loser. I'm only being so harsh about it because I have a high opinion of my own abilities, and I'm also very undermotivated.

The trouble with considering yourself a genius is that it's one of those hypotheses that can be proved by any evidence. If you fail to develop a decent work ethic or achieve any useful results, it's easy to compare yourself to other 'geniuses' who were the same. "There are plenty of 'other geniuses' who were lazy and complacent, and let's face it, what genius ever worked a 9 to 5 his whole life?" So it's a very counterproductive label.

"Winners don't act like pricks"
 
 
---
22:50 / 22.04.04
Hmm...(scratches head. For a long time)

?!?

I meant that there could be something really cool coming up that would mean that nothing's all gone wrong.

"Winners don't act like pricks"

Everyone acts like a prick from time to time, even winners.
 
 
Perfect Tommy
23:04 / 22.04.04
It's cool that you're in a cocoon. Just don't stay in it too long. I think that many proto-geniuses have to wallow around being dumbasses for a while before they can let their genius blossom. But, during that time, they're not geniuses—they're dumbasses who, God willing, will be geniuses one day. That's how I feel about myself, anyway... I spent a lot of time here when I was being a dumbass, and eventually that stopped and I started accomplishing some stuff.

And YOU CAN TOO, for only $299.95!
 
 
agvvv
09:58 / 23.04.04
Do I get free food of any kind with that?
 
 
agvvv
09:59 / 23.04.04
Toast maybe? With spam? Mule shaped credit card?
 
 
40%
10:45 / 23.04.04
Yeah, but the guy from Babylon Zoo was asked by Chris Morris if he was a genius, and his response was "I think I will become a genius". Is that a model to follow?

Maitreya - please take me with a pinch of salt. It's good for your health
 
 
Alex's Grandma
10:51 / 23.04.04
There's a lot be said, though, for just not doing anything. Indolence in itself isn't always a bad thing - I mean if A Hitler, for example, had just kicked back and, er, chilled for a while, hung out, got stoned, and tried to think about, seriously, what was wrong with his paintings, as opposed to just launching this monstrous offensive on everyone's sanity, the world would be quite different. Not that I'm comparing anyone to AH or anything, but this whole " seize the day " thing - to a certain extent it's not always so good.
 
 
agvvv
15:49 / 23.04.04
Hmmm.. I havent really seen Hitlers paintings. Are they googable? Lets see..
 
 
The Apple-Picker
15:52 / 23.04.04
I saw one once.

LAME.
 
 
agvvv
15:53 / 23.04.04
Indeed. Not only did I find Hitler`s paintings, there were also porn and iq tests..
 
 
XXII:X:II = XXX
18:01 / 23.04.04
Apple-Picker picked a peck of pickled pommes: Bah. I feel ya, VJB2. When I was a kid, I was in this special program, and wouldn't you know it, almost all the kids that came out of it ended up being some of the most pathetic underachievers I've ever seen. "We're smart, and that's enough for us!"

But it's not really the kids' fault; it's the fucked up adults who live vicariously through this shit who pronounce the race over and you the winner before you've even stepped up to the starting gate that really fucks with a kid's mind. I'm a big believer in personal responsibility, which only comes to me after a good chunk of my life being even more victimhood-inclined than I am now, but on the other hand, in that nabile state, kids need a delicate balance of encouragement and critique of which unfortunately few parents seem really capable.

It probably saved me, though. My parents thought I was plagued with learning disabilities before the program called them about me. My grades had been terrible, you see.

That's how it worked out for my sister: all through school until she dropped out of college her freshman year, she got so much reinforcement that she had learning disabilities that she believed it. When she finally went back school as a more fully formed adult, she realized she didn't really have learning disabilities at all. And the contrast in perceptions vs. reality between the two of us I'm sure led to further mindfucks for the both of us.

Maitreya saves: It hasn't all gone wrong, you haven't lost your chance, your still alive with a chance to do something, (something that you may not even be aware of yet) so how could it have?
Get back up off the damn floor!


Take that handle rather seriously, do you?

Look, I'm prone to bouts of melodrama, I admit it, and this is after many years of work to minimize that. A few years ago you would have had to have sat through every sordid detail of my tale of woe. I'm a bit beyond that, now, and I have a purpose to my existence, and for once I actually appear to be making some sort of motion in that general direction. I'm not saying I don't have a certain satisfaction in the way in which events have played themselves out, or even that certain alternatives would have been without their own idiosynchratic flaws; I don't know that. What I know is that it was a moment in my life where my potential was quantified, as much as such things can be, as being extraordinary, though that quantification may have been the first step in destroying what it perceived. However it started, that moment was torn away so completely that the void where it should have been has been a ghost that's haunted me ever since. Thankfully, the edges get blurry and it's been spackled over in parts and it's far enough in the distance that it doesn't loom as large as once it did, but it is and always will be there in not being there.

VJB2
 
  
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