Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Unwanted shoes

illmatic

12:34 / 16.04.04

I hae a pair of Size 11 DMs which are too small for me.

I brought them because a) I was in a hurry and b) through some weird twist of vanity, I was in denial about having big feet. So now I'm stuck with them, and I throw it open to you, the 'lith, for suggestions as to what to do with them. I was planning on filling them with Crystal Meth and giving them to Flyboy for his birthday but I want to see if anyone has any better ideas. Well?

(BTW - if anyone actually wants them, hardly worn, PM and let me know).

Smoothly

12:42 / 16.04.04

Boaster.
Do you also have a packet of condoms that are too tight for you?

Jub

12:52 / 16.04.04

SW - before he was illmatic, he was tripod.

illmatic

12:53 / 16.04.04

Only when I put them on my head. That Post Office hold up was a total failure, I tell you.

sleazenation

12:55 / 16.04.04

I feel your pain Illmatic for i hjave the same problem... Where do you get your shoes from ?

8===>Q: alyn

13:07 / 16.04.04

Ship them to NYC and I'll rent them out as studio apartments. We'll split the proceeds 60-40. I'm taking all the risk, after all.

illmatic

13:15 / 16.04.04

... lube in my eyes, those "rib" marks on my face for days, it was a bloody nightmare...

Soory Q, lost in horrible reminescenes, that could work - if you couldn't rent them as studio flats, you could probably put them somewhere cheap, rent them out to struggling artists and hold illegal raves in the evenings... you could call it "The Doo in a Shoe".

Smoothly

13:23 / 16.04.04

... lube in my eyes, those "rib" marks on my face for days, it was a bloody nightmare...

Got you out of that copper's head-lock though, din it.

8===>Q: alyn

13:27 / 16.04.04

Raves are so '97, Illmatic. The avauntistes these days are holding Kidnap Soirees, where the promoters hold everyone hostage at gunpoint and make them take ecstacy and dance whether they like it or not. Are these sneakers or shoes? Because I'm thinking sneakers might not hold up to a police siege, but a pair of workboots or patent leathers might last till the Feds arrive, by which time I and my confederates will be holed up in a pair of bunny slippers in Riverside...

Goodness Gracious Meme

13:58 / 16.04.04

bring 'em down here and we'll go 'messing about in boots'

ahem.

8===>Q: alyn

14:03 / 16.04.04

Is that that rhyming English slang I learned about in the fine feature film Ocean's Eleven? I didn't even know there were black people in England until I saw Snatch.

As a career criminal, I can write these movies off my taxes as a business expense.

Goodness Gracious Meme

14:16 / 16.04.04

naaa. More Three men in a boot territory...

Tryphena Absent

14:20 / 16.04.04

I'll take them, I can stuff socks in the end and paint them red. I'll look like a clown. Hell, yeah.

(Ignore her, she does not need new shoes, she does not need more shoes, she has too many shoes.)<-- my common sense

illmatic

14:21 / 16.04.04

Qalyn, you may be interested to know that the correct Cokney rhyming slang for boots is "daisy roots". You would abbreviate this as follows: "I've got a luvverly pair of daisies, they go well wiv me new whistle. I'm wearing 'em in court next week for cutting that cannnhht's froat wiv that fahhhccckin' razor wire". (Whistle = Whistle and Flute = Suit). However, the items in question are not daisies, or boots, they are shoes. I don't know what the rhyming sland is for shoes. Doggie doos? Number twos? I dunno.

Grey Area

14:25 / 16.04.04

Shoe: How D'You Do
Shoes: Ones and Twos or Rhythm and Blues

My, don't those cheeky cockneys have some interesting twists on the Queen's English?

Jub

14:37 / 16.04.04

A quick googly boogly suggests either Canoes - which is, frankly, rubbish. Or Claret and blues, which is pants too.

Grey Area

14:46 / 16.04.04

Illmatic, the girls in my office want to know how tall you are. The reaction of one was, and I quote: "Jesus, there's a jolly green giant loose somewhere!". Which is something I never expected to hear on a Friday afternoon...

Goodness Gracious Meme

15:00 / 16.04.04

cripes. the jolly green giant, is now, AFAIK, loose on the streets of our Capital.

You Have Been Warned

gingerbop

15:12 / 16.04.04

Plant daisies in them.

Mourne Kransky

21:37 / 17.04.04

You are the tallest hobbit in the burrow, Illmatic Baggins.

Add Your Reply