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| When I first got into magick, I was a ceremonialist, but was terribly lazy. The whole thing seemed overwhelming. I would look at all of the things that I should be doing and wasn't, and would kick myself repeatedly, (pink cheeks?). What I realized was that I was a person that needed to change my approach to the practice of magick. I started to do a few simple thngs along the line of Liber MMM,(Liber Null and Psychonaut), things that I would just do at any given time in the day. I didn't make out a schedule. I didn't say, "I must get X and Y and Z done by such and such" . What I did.... I would just do at the drop of a hat. It would occur to me to do some real time visualizing, and I would just do it. I'd meditate anywhere at any time.... on the bus, in my livingroom. I wouldn't think about it, I wouldn't schedule it. I would just do it. All of a sudden, I found myself doing a ton more work than I previously was, and getting better results. Not only that, it was fun rather than being such a chore. All of the magickal exercising that I was doing was strengthening my will, and it started to get easier and easier, (if not rather strange at times). I started to learn more difficult exercises, also done pretty much at the drop of a hat. Training everyday produced new experiences, out of which came other exercises. Over time, I began to get more structured with it. It just came naturally. What I found out by this was that I was a person who does best by just doing rather than planning. Whenever I find myself "trying", I simply go back to just "doing". It has become so natural that it isn't a strain, and looking back at it, once I started doing things that way, it ceased to become one. |
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