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I can relate to you, I had the same problem. When I started practicing magick, particularly magick to heal myself, (I had severe chronic fatigue at the time. First healing ritual I got a pulmonary absess the nest day that landed me in ,the hospital in terrible pain. The second healing ritual I got chicken pox the next day. Third healing ritual, bad accident that crippled me for life. I quit doing healing rituals. What I needed to do was to reprogram myself and get to the core of sme very negative material in my life. I now have no problems with t,hat. For myself, what I turned to was eastern technique. Meditation, consciousness reformulation, stilling the mind, examining cause and effect,(not karma, but simple cause and effect, I've found that the karma concept can cause more trouble than it's worth). NLP was mentioned, while I haven't used it, I've heard from a lot of people that it works well for changing internal programming. Actually some of the new agey stuff works well for this, but one of the best techniques that I found was integration of undesired "opposites". Things that I had been told just were not kosher, like lust, anger, pride, and ,the like. Good luck. Issac Bonewits wrote about this, called it "nega-psi". It can be overcome. Look at me.... I'm not dead.  |
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