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FEMININE

 
 
Bear
21:46 / 19.02.02
Hi.. a friend sent me an e-mail about a paper they have to do for class (in America, not that makes any difference), anyway thought it would be quite interesting maybe for here (plus I can send her a link to this site and she can see lots of opinions )

Anyone this was it -

Age:

What do you think the word feminine means? (no using a dictonary!):

How would you use "feminine" in a sentence? Give me an example:

Is feminine a positive or negative word?

Is there a situation where it would be considered a negative word?

Is there a situation where it would be considered a positive word?

Any views, background, or special meaning that the word "feminine" holds for you?
 
 
Shortfatdyke
10:44 / 20.02.02
ok, this is probably going to be entirely unhelpful but i don't think i actually know what feminine really means. when i was a child, i didn't want to be associated with the term, as it seemed to imply boring, weak.... 'feminine' girls kept their dresses clean and played rather boring games. i played with the boys. i got dirty, played football, climbed trees, had adventures.... exciting stuff. so the word has only negative connections for me. although i'm sure it's true meaning has been twisted over time, and i was probably supposed to want to be feminine and so give up having fun....
 
 
pointless and uncalled for
10:46 / 20.02.02
I'm bound to get ripped up for this so let me get this over with quickly.

What do you think the word feminine means? (no using a dictonary!):

Typical or stereotypical to/of females.

How would you use "feminine" in a sentence? Give me an example:

La is the feminine of the French word for the.

Is feminine a positive or negative word?

Yes, no, maybe depending on context.

Is there a situation where it would be considered a negative word?

Yes.

Is there a situation where it would be considered a positive word?

Yes

Any views, background, or special meaning that the word "feminine" holds for you?

Not especially. I treat it the same way that I treat all character traits.
 
 
captain piss
11:09 / 20.02.02
I think I remember something interesting in Germaine Greer’s last book- the one with the big horrible bit of meat on the cover, in which she talked about haranguing transsexuals and transgenderists on what they meant by the word – what is this core of femininity that they desperately need to live in alignment with? Is it the wearing of make-up and dresses? Owning a womb?
Can’t really remember much but it might be an interesting place to look further

Oddly enough, I don't think I've ever witnessed a woman responding badly to this label- clearly my history of failed chat-up-lines and attempts to faux-pas my way into the sack serves me well on topics like this. It seems one of those words that risks pigeon-holing someone as a bit limp-wristed when they're obviously the more aggressive type.
 
 
Shortfatdyke
11:20 / 20.02.02
meme buggerer - your last sentence has rather thrown me. are you saying that my perception of the meaning of 'feminine' is actually correct, ('limp wristed' implying weak) and that not being that way makes me 'a more aggressive type'?

apologies if i've misunderstood, but if that is indeed the case, i find it somewhat insulting. it's also completely untrue.
 
 
gridley
11:23 / 20.02.02
okay, someone has to be willing to state the stereotypical. why not me?

masculine: beating people up, fixing things, being in charge, dirt, hardness, roughness, active, beer, sports, sex, porn, fried food

feminine: compassion, nuturing, softness, delicate, pretty, passive, wine coolers, art, love, babies, salads

pretty harsh, I know, but let me then state that most people are some combination of the the two. I'm probably almost as feminine as I am masculine. Whereas my brother Chris is about 99% masculine. And my girlfriend is probably 75% femine. my friend cindy is probably 60% masculine. my friend michael is probably 70% feminine.

So, basically I think we've come a long way in opening up options in terms of behavior (compared to, say, my mom's generation).
 
 
captain piss
11:40 / 20.02.02
sfd- I did mean it in the way you suggest but I'm confused as to why you would find that insulting. I just meant 'aggressive' in a way that I would apply to lots of people, male and female, in a good way. As in: standing up for yourself, not being overly weak or passive in challenging situations etc.
 
 
Shortfatdyke
11:41 / 20.02.02
ah! i would use the word 'assertive', but that's okay - it's just that i'm rather a wuss and needed clarification!
 
 
Cherry Bomb
12:32 / 20.02.02
Interesting.

I was out with someone last night who told me that I was the "right" mix of feminine and masculine qualities. Wasn't exactly sure how to take this. I don't know if there IS a right mix, and I certainly don't think having any of the qualities that we traditionally associate with femininity and masculinity are better or worse. Does that make sense?

I've always associated "feminine" with being a woman (or with noun articles in french but I digress).

I LIKE being feminine, at least the way I see it. I enjoy being a girl, as the song says. I know I have masculine qualities and I am certain that they put some people off. I'm loud, I'm agressive, I'm direct (some may just call that 'American' har har har) - and I am certain that those qualities would be more easily accepted by people if "the package" they came in was a man's body rather than a woman.

But I don't care. I consider it nature's way of "weeding out the wimps so I don't have to," and besides that, I would be HAPPY to be a woman who is associated with the words, "assertive," "strong," "direct," etc. Not that I think those qualities are better. I value the side of me that is emotional and people-oriented just as much as I value my more analytical, inward-directed side.

I just like the idea of traditionally masculine words being associated with a woman. I like the words of traditionally masculine ideas being associated with a man. We're not that different, you see.

I suppose I enjoy being a bit of a contradiction. :}
 
 
Shortfatdyke
12:37 / 20.02.02
cherry - i love being a woman as well, it's just that i think the accepted/stereotyped meaning of 'feminine' describes how society would like women to be, rather than what we actually are. if that makes any sense....
 
 
gridley
12:42 / 20.02.02
quote:Originally posted by Cherry Bomb:
I know I have masculine qualities and I am certain that they put some people off. I'm loud, I'm agressive, I'm direct (some may just call that 'American' har har har


Yeah, come to think of it, in the minds of most Americans (right or wrong, America = masculine, and the rest of the world has something to prove....
 
 
Cherry Bomb
12:54 / 20.02.02
I must say I agree with you, SFD, but that's why enjoy the contradiction. I'll give you the fact that men and women are different. I'll even say, OK, there are probably things that women are more capable of doing than men and vice versa.

This gent I was with last night was explaining how "men are more logical..."

Grr. I don't think that's true at all. I have won many the argument with men who continue to allow emotion to be the basis of their argument, rather than intellectual analysis. I'm not saying emotion doesn't often fuel one's reasons for arguing, but discussion should be based in intellectual analysis for any sort of discourse to really happen. My favorite is when men say women are "weaker" using the "women can't reason and are more emotional" argument, then proceed to use all emotional, subjective examples to build their case.
 
 
MaximusOverdrive
02:32 / 21.02.02
anything to help a fellow student out. hope none of my opinions expressed here are found insulting, but i'm just firing away with what i know...

Age: 24/ male

What do you think the word feminine means? (no using a dictonary!): having traits that are decidedly female in nature. curving rather than angular, soft instead of hard, passionate rather than cold, motherly instead of manly. for some reason, when i see the word "feminine" i also think of cats. i guess because "feminine" and "feline" are somewhat close in spelling.

How would you use "feminine" in a sentence? Give me an example: My manner can sometimes be described as feminine.

Is feminine a positive or negative word? it depends on the context of it. just as aggresive can be both positive and negative, it's a descriptor that really is reflective of how it is used.

Is there a situation where it would be considered a negative word? when overly masculine guys use it to put people like me down. ;-)

Is there a situation where it would be considered a positive word? when a woman walks in the room and exudes a primal sensuality. that says "femenine" to me.

Any views, background, or special meaning that the word "feminine" holds for you? well, i'm a some-what efeminate male, so i've had the word bandied about myself a bit. outside of that, there's nothing overly striking that i can think of.

laters,

-michael
 
  
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