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Crossposted from my livejournal located at: http://www.livejournal.com/users/leoz
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Of today's dream I only remember one part and that is that in my dream I realized that I was having a dream, asked a character in my dream (the dream was taking place in Union Square Park) if he knew that this was a dream. He denied any knowledge and I started questioning whether I really was dreaming. Eventually, as I decided that I was actually awake, I woke up. Except I didn't really wake up. Instead I had awaken from a dream within a dream. Then I woke up around 15 minutes ago.
I don't really remember yesterday's dream but it'll come back to me... Ah! Just remembered. It was some weid semi-horror movie type dream. We were in some place, like a building that was infested with something. We were avoiding that something and the key memory of my dream involves a large hallway, as if in some large bussiness building, with a lot of elevators. Not all the elevators were working but one that did had its doors open and little red bugs, resembling ticks, crawled out. We (I wasn't the only person in the dream) avoided the bugs and then that's pretty much all that I remember. I might remember more later.
The dream that took place between Saturday and Sunday involved a weird house. The house, which I do not believe I've seen from the outside, had at least 3 floors. One part of the building was condemned (due to the absense of any floor.) That part of the house could be accessed from a door in a small room. The small room was converted into a closet so to discourage people from going into the other part of the house and yet to also be useful. Hmmm... actually it might've been a small apartment building instead of a private home but I believe that it was a private home. Anyways, I remember that I wasn't living there. In fact I somehow stumbled onto it. It was some sort of commune though not necessarily the communist nor hippie type. Instead it seemed to be more of a squatter commune or a frat-house with inhabitants having the same qualities as the characters in P.C.U. and the Illuminatus Trilogy. One room had a t.v. on top of a small black cabinet which housed what must have been a vcr/dvd player and some video games. I remember that at some point in the dream therewas a party on the upper floor but that's almost all that I remember in any detail.
Oh, I just remembered more about the dream within a dream. In that dream within a dream I realized that I was dreaming and that's when I remembered something which I had remembered in waking life. I remembered that I realized that I've never fully-lucid dreamed. I mean I've gone lucid in dreams many times before but I've never really used that to the full advantage. i've never given up on, what seemed to be, the physics laws of the dream universe. The flying in dreams and stuff had been done before but not with ease. Anyways, so I remembered this in that dream within a dream and started flying around. And the way I flew around was different from previous dreams. In previous dreams I had to make some effort to fly but in this one I just "decided" to fy and did. It wasn't a physical decision but a mental one. Which might answer the question why a lot of people report wakingup after they go lucid. I'll explain...
Since the dream is a product of your own head (if you disagree then comment!) then it's a "reality" (a word which I feel always belongs in quotes or, at least, until we figure it out) created by your subconcious mind. When you go lucid you are realizing that you're dreaming. You are realizing that the dream is a product of your own subconcious mind, aka "your imagination." So then you become separated from the "dream reality". Your concious mind splits off from the unconcious because now you're not an actor in a scripted play. Instead you are now an improvisationalist in a scripted play. The dream becomes a "consensus reality". The consensus is between you and the subconcious.
Now, to further this point, what happens when you day-dream inside a dream? What happens when you, after going lucid, start creating your own reality (through using your imagination) in your subconciousness' consensus reality? And your creation starts to intrude into your subconciousness' dreamworld?
I'll start theorising (all this could be wrong so don't take it as fact but only as educated guesses): Maybe, since your subconcious is (or is using) your imagination to create the world outside of your dream-self as well as the world within your dream-self (i.e. the dream and the day dreaming which you are doing in the dream are created using the same faculty) it both exists "outside" of you and within you. So maybe the mind then can't decide which dream to stay in. So the day-dreaming intrudes onto the dream world. When I flew in tonight's dream it felt like I was kinda day-dreaming myself flying and yet, at the same time, what I did in the day-dream appeared in the dream reality.
Stop thinking visually for a second. Start thinking conceptually. That's how I was day-dreaming. I wasn't day-dreaming a scene with me floating around. Instead I was day-dreaming, quite easily I must say, the sensation of me flying and the direction and speed with which I was flying.
So that didn't wake me up from that dream within a dream. I was only altering myself. I was the only actor not following his lines in the play. I was the improvisational Canadian in a Shakespeian play. But once the day-dreaming takes on a greater sense, once things start being changed rapidly the subconcious mind can't decide if you want to remain in the day-dream or the dream. Or something like that. I think that the subconcious can't decide which reality, both "created" by "you", you want to stay in. so, maybe it defaults back to the waking state.
And that's why maybe a lot of people wake up after going lucid.
Just a small thought.
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