Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Underground > Radio & Music >

People who piss you off in music.

Page: (1)2 3

All Acting Regiment

15:11 / 30.08.03

Okay, this is for anyone to write about people that they don't like in relation to music. Anyone- maybe it's an artist who gets up your vest, or a producer who makes snare drums sund too loud in the left pan through your zrt10000000 subtweety speaker system. Ooo.

At the moment this probably includes avril lavigne and busted at least, together with this guy in a stone roses t-shirt who threw beeer all over me at a gig and then wanted me to pay for it. And travis. Go on, add some more.

Jack The Bodiless

16:03 / 30.08.03

Jon Bon Jovi. One of the only people in the world I truly despise. The antithesis of what rock n' roll represents. A nasty, dyed-in-the-wool corporate hack, who did a jeans advert, and waxed his chest in preparation. Also sacked Alec Jon Such, Bon Jovi's bass player for over a decade, for making a slightly derogatory comment about him in a bass guitar magazine. He's the only person in the band actually signed to the recording contract, you see, so the rest are just session players who haven't done anything to piss him off. Yet.

Then there's appearing as a recurring character in Ally McBeal, his horrifying obsession with cowboys, the fucking Superman tattoo, his recent admission that he regularly screws groupies and that his wife puts up with it (delivered in a throwaway, "yeah, like it's a big deal" kind of way)... and let's not forget that his music has sucked for so long that he's given cock rock a bad name.

Oh yeah... the worst lyrics In The World. Check this:

With an ironclad fist I wake up and
French kiss the morning
While some marching band keeps
its own beat in my head
While we're talking
About all of the things that I long to believe
About love and the truth and
what you mean to me
And the truth is baby you're all that I need

I want to lay you on a bed of roses
For tonite I sleep on a bed on nails
I want to be just as close as the Holy Ghost is
And lay you down on bed of roses...

I can't go on... it's not just the shit music, I'm all about live and let live when it comes to this stuff, and I loved Slippery When Wet back in the day, but the man's a horror, and needs stamping on.

Matthew Fluxington

16:09 / 30.08.03

(shakes head in mild disgust)

What, you couldn't just revive one of the other versions of this thread idea? Or you couldn't just leave it be?

Let's the pissing contest go on, I suppose.

17:45 / 30.08.03

oh do lighten up Flux! Give us a rant about Conor Oberst, you know you want to..

The Natural Way

12:06 / 31.08.03

But this

With an ironclad fist I wake up and
French kiss the morning
While some marching band keeps
its own beat in my head
While we're talking
About all of the things that I long to believe
About love and the truth and
what you mean to me
And the truth is baby you're all that I need

I want to lay you on a bed of roses
For tonite I sleep on a bed on nails
I want to be just as close as the Holy Ghost is
And lay you down on bed of roses...

This is brilliant!

Fucking Rock Beauty, mate - ROCK, motherfucking, BEAUTY!!!!!

The worst lyrics award has to go to Desree. And we've been over that territory a billion times before......

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

12:23 / 31.08.03

I know this isn't really the place, this being a thread for anger and stuff. But how's about frustration?

Steve Miller Band- "Some people call me Maurice... cos I speak of the pumpetus of love"!

What the fuck is a pumpetus? (And yes, I Googled it... and found a blog entitled "Pumpetus of Love". Not much help. But it did have a great Keith Chegwin insult in it.)

I dunno... just the sheer gulf between that and me ever understanding it are enough to make me incandescent. Were I not such a wuss it would make me say "Stoat SMASH..." as it is, I'll have to settle for "Stoat wait till you're out then piss on your sofa".

13:05 / 31.08.03

A lot of music historians piss me off. You're trying to tell them about a record with brilliant tunes that just crackles with energy and ideas, and they tell you precisely where they think each individual lick or harmony came from, in such a dry and colourless manner. And they each have their own agendas - I have a mate who's obsessed with telling me that Jane's Addiciton are responsible for all the music released afterwards. Gah.

Jack The Bodiless

14:07 / 31.08.03

Flux - I think this thread has a broader remit than the "We all hate Phil Collins, don't we? And anyone who doesn't, is, of course, crap" school of mindless scrofula. It requests details on the pain you suffer from certain bands, certain singers, certain producers, scenes, sounds, anything to do with music, and asks you why... which, at least has the possibility of providing some interesting debate without descending into sleazy sneering.

What it isn't doing is citing a position backed up only by taste, and then being incredulously contemptuous if anyone disagrees* - if I'd thought it was, I wouldn't have posted.

*Like your own posts about Tool, picking an example out of thin air.

Jack The Bodiless

14:10 / 31.08.03

set - yeah, I remember your mate giving me the very same plaintive rant. He really didn't appreciate me listing all the reasons Dave Navarro owes Edward Van Halen a (low alcohol) pint...

14:12 / 31.08.03

Easy. Madge, for softening the brains of lefty academics ("She's really a feminist, subverting the oppressive male gaze and Sex was so transgressive!"); for slagging off British workmen as lazy and then complaining people don't think she has feelings; for trivializing the Kabbalah (may Lilith steal little boy Rocco); for finishing off the career of her husband (OTOH, he might have been a one-trick pony) by remaking a movie that's offensive on so many levels (and one more, because she starred in it--Goldie Hawn was funnier in "Overboard" anyway).

And if Arnie beats R.A. Wilson in California, she'll probably run for office in another decade.

16:04 / 31.08.03

Pompetus= mishearing of Puppeteuse from "The Letter" by The Medallions. The writer of that apparently coined the word to represent 'a secret paper-doll fantasy figure [thus puppet], who would be my everything and bear my children.' Steve Miller loved the song but evidently didn't have a lyric sheet so he used the word Pompetus in the song, creating it solely for the annoyance of Stoatie.

17:37 / 31.08.03

I couldn't disagree with Stoatie more - I absolutely love it when utterly inexplicable lines like that turn up in songs.. and that particular one cracks me up everytime..

Most of the 'people who piss me off in music' are too obvious to even bother listing.

I will however take the oppurtunity to gripe about all the utterly joyless and thunderously dull "post-hardcore" bands that everybody in the world of noisy rock music seem to be going mad over.

21:57 / 31.08.03

The fucking Gallagher brothers. You can't get more annoying than that. Oh and Marylin Manson is not only boring and disgusting, but also loves to make you extremely uncomfortable.

Hattie's Kitchen

23:07 / 31.08.03

Mick Hucknall - the very definition of the word "wanksplash". And memorably once said he'd "rather have AIDS than play a concert in Liverpool". Funny how he couldn't get away fast enough when an HIV-positive friend of mine decided to take him up on that and offered to french kiss him...and now he's slaughtering fucking Hall & Oates songs, which were bad enough in the first place. I mean, for fuck's sake, take all your money and your nymphets and crawl down a sewer and just DIE!

Jack The Bodiless

10:48 / 01.09.03

Brit Pop Is Dead...and Marylin Manson is not only boring and disgusting, but also loves to make you extremely uncomfortable.

Funny... I'd have thought that being disgusting and loving to make others extremely uncomfortable would make you anything but boring. In fact, I'd say that's one of the few things you couldn't accuse our Brian of...

11:41 / 01.09.03

On bad lyrics did anyone here that Appleton song the other month thankfully it didn't chart (or at least not very high) - worst lyrics ever

I wake up, in the morning
Pull the blinds and see the sunshine
And I wonder, if this Monday
Will wipe the rain off yesterday

Let's go fishing, down the river
Let's go fly a kite on primrose hill
Take advantage of the sunshine
There's no telling when the rain comes in

I feel good, I feel fine
Kicked the flu last week now I'm alright

Come and meet me on the corner
Or just pick me up and we can drive
I was sitting, feeling pretty
Blast the music on the radio

I feel I'm walking, or maybe running
With my favourite song I'm humming

Da da da, da da da, da da da

I walked in to my house
Saw a spider in the bath tub
And when I screemed, It nearly ran
Cos he was just as scared as I was

Called my mom to tell her I love her
Cos she always has been there for me
See I'm blessed with a family
That will love me till eternity

Da da da, da da da, da da da
And I'm glad to be alive
Da da da, da da da, da da da
Whatever it's like outside
Da da da, da da da, da da da
I'm just glad to be alive
Da da da, da da da, da da da

Dressing up, with no effort
Put my hair up in a pony tail
My ID is getting rugged
I will buy myself another pair

I got a call, from my boyfriend
Saying he'll be here at seven
He said he made, a reservation
At our local dining station

As I walk, down the street
The puddle's soaking up my feet
In the water, there's reflections
Of the city street's projections

Stand and face me, just incase you
Miss a chance now to embrace me
Keep on walking, holding hands now
Let's enjoy this dark and rainy night

Started here, started there
With my skirt turned up but I don't care

I got home, kissed my daughter
Jumped in to bed with my lover
Listened to Harry Potter
On my cassette player audio

Tryphena Absent

12:07 / 01.09.03

an HIV-positive friend of mine decided to take him up on that and offered to french kiss him

Your friend is a brave, brave person... or completely wrong in the head. I mean, seriously, what would it really take to offer to snog Mick Hucknall?

hanabius yamamura

13:59 / 01.09.03

... surely it's worth mentioning the utter horror that is J-Lo ...

14:44 / 01.09.03

That Appleton song is strangely reminiscent to the 'Stream of Concussion' song technique displayed in Life by Des'ree.

I’m afraid of the dark,
‘specially when I’m in a park
And there’s no-one else around,
Ooh, I get the shivers.
I don’t want to see a ghost,
It’s a sight that I fear most.
I’d rather have a piece of toast and
watch the evenings news.

Quite.

Jack The Bodiless

15:31 / 01.09.03

Mmmm... I have to admit, though, I'd rather have a piece of toast than see a ghost. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not a toast freak, but thick crusty bread, well buttered, and thickly covered in roule... can't be beat. Preferably with a nice hot sweet cup of tea. Yum.

20:57 / 01.09.03

People who don't get Busted get right on my nerves. Avril Hate I get- if she gets one more person to write one more song for her about her very 4REAL!! she is, I'll harm things. However, I don't believe Busted ever gave an interview to Popworld magazine complaining that their image was "too fucking pop", as Avril has.

And really, Busted know they haven't got a drummer. They know small girls like them, and that, even though they write their own songs (OK, the monkey one writes their own songs), thwey aren't 4REAL!!. And they don't care. They're fun, they're stupid, they jump about a lot and Year 3000 is hella catchy, like pubic lice.

11:16 / 02.09.03

My favourite thing about Busted is that the 'bass player' is also the 'drummer' - and he switches between the two in their video!! Now that takes skill!

As to Avril Lavigne, I know I'm a few months late on this one, but it's my contention that Sk8r Boi is just about THE BEST POP SONG EVER! No irony intended. I realise this isn't a popular viewpoint, but nevertheless, for the couple of minutes that video plays on SmathHits TV or whatever, corporate punk has offically won me over and I jump up and down like an excited child.

It's such a shame that all her other songs completely suck ass though..

Tryphena Absent

11:42 / 02.09.03

God. Urrrghhh. I hate J-Lo so much. Stupid hoe and Bennifer's not much better but luckily he doesn't try to sing.

A

12:15 / 02.09.03

Fun fact- SK8R Boi (or however you misspell it correctly) is largely a ripoff of a song off Blink 182's first album.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

13:34 / 02.09.03

Wait, I've slipped in to a parallel world where stopping Guy Ritchie making films is a bad thing?

RATM annoy me, as each song of their album so far is of a type that you hear it once and then the next time you hear it you immediately leap for the remote control because you think 'oh no, not this song again, I've heard it millions of times'.

Regrettable Juvenilia

13:46 / 02.09.03

B-but Lady, they stick it to The Man! Do you have any idea how scared The Man was when that guy from Rage climbed up some scaffolding at the VMAs that time? Subversive!

The Natural Way

13:48 / 02.09.03

It's fucking wonderful that whenever someone cusses Desree they're thinking about the same lyrics.

But, y'know, her other songs are just as bad.

Have you heard Crazy Maze

'Cause we're livin', livin' in a Crazy Maze...

Need I go on?

Would it be okay to totally destroy the Lighthouse Family here, or will Jack get angry and go on about how they bring back good memories?

Oh, fuck it....

I mean, we were talking MOR a few weeks ago, but, really, does it get any more middle-of-the-road than that bald prick and his mates? This is coffee-table, Barratt-Home horror in its truest, most perfect incarnation. Gentle voice rhyming *fly*, *sky* and *high* like there's no tomorrow... Gentle, gentle voice... 'Soooo bluuuuue...'

DIEEEEEEE!

Or at least cease to have anything resembling a music career. Oh, look, You have! Great! Never come back.

A few weeks back, I read an article in the Guardian about how we all really love pop music. So far so good. I think a lot of us prolly do, or at least would be lying if we said we don't like any of it, but (and this is a big BUT!) enjoying the odd bit of Aguilera does not equal prefering the dulcet sounds of the Lighthouse Family over LCD Soundsystems pumping out of the car stereo on the way back from a club (how said journo put it). I hate the way so many journo's have that 'C'mon, admit it...' thing going on. Miss Cocksplash, you've just made a very dark admission.

The Natural Way

13:48 / 02.09.03

Fucking, fucking lack of edit option!

Bring it fucking back!

Garrrrgh!

Regrettable Juvenilia

13:57 / 02.09.03

There is an edit option, Pig. It's called 'moderate post'.

Tryphena Absent

13:59 / 02.09.03

That guy from The Lighthouse Family... worst thing is he can't even hold a note.

15:09 / 02.09.03

Fun fact- SK8R Boi (or however you misspell it correctly) is largely a ripoff of a song off Blink 182's first album.

NO WAY!

I'm shock-o-lad!

I bet Blink's song was crap though. They're not punks, and they don't do ballet.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

15:28 / 02.09.03

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH FUCK!

When I said RATM in the above post I obviously meant RHCP and if I'd only taken a little time to make sure I meant what I said, RATM I have no strong feelings about either way.

Don't work and post kids.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

15:30 / 02.09.03

Now that Lauren Laverne I do genuinely dislike. Let's be honest, Kenicke weren't really that good were they?

16:03 / 02.09.03

Kenickie were and forever shall be brilliant.

Shame on you for suggesting otherwise.

And, considering the godawful shite TV shows she insists on appearing in, Ms. Laverne manages to retain a surprising degree of composure and dignity.

16:07 / 02.09.03

I suppose Robbie Williams gets my goat a bit, although it’s maybe a bit obvious and crappy to admit to such a thing. It’s probably just because it’s so mired in all the stuff that makes music today seem so far from the spirit of rock n roll and genuineness and so on - ”yes, let’s celebrate modern consumer reality, and shitty corporate pish and Heat magazine and everything..”
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

Page: (1)2 3