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FUCK ME, WHATEVER-THE-FUCK-YOUR-NAME-IS

18:31 / 22.08.03

Fuck me.

By clicking on this thread, you now have seven days to get fucked*. Otherwise, your cats will be glassed, your breasts will sag, your testicles rot and your granny will walk in on you while you're masturbating. All at once.

*=Nudists, nymphomaniacs and Golden Shower enthusiasts need not apply.

18:59 / 22.08.03

er... people??

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

20:00 / 23.08.03

I'm fucked today as I have to go in to work in about an hour until 8 am tomorrow.

So I'm fine.

11:48 / 24.08.03

That doesn't sound too good: my granny's dead.

hanabius yamamura

14:29 / 24.08.03

... happily married as i am, to cantankor ( a VERY occasional poster on 'lith'), i feel safe from your gypsy curse ... now, if you'll excuse me, i shall go and work on my safety ... x

hanabius yamamura

14:33 / 24.08.03

... ps no offence to gypsies, romanies, travellers et al ... purely a figure of speech ... apologies ...

A

00:06 / 25.08.03

My granny keeps walking out on me while I'm masturbating.

03:03 / 25.08.03

Yeah, Ive seen her. Quite depressed. She keeps on asking me why you keep masturbating when she's available...why wont you ride the wrinkles?

03:04 / 25.08.03

This is negative reinforcement, Chrome/God.

I'm all about the positive.

A

11:57 / 25.08.03

Kegboy, dude, I told you to stop seeing my granny, you bastard.

Spyder Todd 2008

14:41 / 25.08.03

shit. couldn't you have warned us in the abstract before clicking this that it was a curse?

18:17 / 25.08.03

Oi, but it's a good curse -- honest.

It demands action(!), lest zombie grannies interrupt your sacred task, or the smelly-fingers-tango depending on your POV.

Unless your chosen co-combatant in the course of the seven days develops feeling's for you like in Life is Hell, and provides hope that the tweety boirds will forever sing as beautifully like in Life is Hell and then cruelly dumps you like in Life is Hell, it is a fun little adventure.

Trust me.

20:34 / 25.08.03

When I was little and my dear old Granny died, my Mum tried to cheer me up by telling me she was in Heaven now and would watch over me all the time. Couldn't masturbate for at least a month after that, thinking of Granny peering down through the ceiling at me as I exercised my little lurve muscle. Stopped me picking my nose for a while too.

Only thing that cheered me up about it was the thought that, in time, I'd be dead too and could perve all day from the celestial plain.

22:21 / 25.08.03

When you say get "fucked" Does being off your face on copious amounts of 'drugs' and alcohol count????

otherwise this barbelite is going to having to not get fucked in order to attempt to get fucked instead.

Personally I've always found one a lot easier then the other (betcha' can't guess which?)

Tryphena Absent

22:46 / 25.08.03

Hmm... I've clicked on this thread twice today. I seem to have a memory lapse, I can't remember what it's about until I pop in and realise it irritates me again. Anyway, ignoring my own personal view of it, does this mean I have to get fucked twice in the next seven days?

Spyder Todd 2008

00:41 / 26.08.03

I would say no, Anna, but it wouldn't hurt.

What if we have no feasible way of getting fucked in this short time span? Short of a diseased hermaphrodite, I mean.

01:37 / 26.08.03

I think hte more times you click the thread, the longer you have to get fucked. Anna, you now have two weeks. I have four.

Spyder Todd 2008

16:56 / 26.08.03

Score! I've got a month to get laid!

17:14 / 26.08.03

Diseased hermaphrodite sounds quite thrilling actually.

If you've no means of getting fucked, can you have a really adventurous wank? Like on a ski lift, in a car chase (while driving, natch) or lying in the freezer boxes in a large supermarket? That would advert the curse surely?

Spyder Todd 2008

22:31 / 26.08.03

you would think, wouldn't you?
5 weeks now....

01:14 / 27.08.03

I think the more times you click the thread, the longer you have to get fucked

I just took a screen captue of this thread and put it as my wallpaper thereby nullifying any time constraints this thread may hope to apply.

Spyder Todd 2008

16:57 / 27.08.03

Why didn't I think of that.....?

18:13 / 27.08.03

Actually, you have intensified the curse.

You'll see.

BWA-HHA-HA-HHA BWA-HHA-HHA-HA
BWA-HHA
HA

Tryphena Absent

18:22 / 27.08.03

Yes but how has the curse been intensified?

Spyder Todd 2008

00:05 / 28.08.03

I think surgeon-boy is just pissed off because we found a way to out smart his silly little curse.

09:35 / 28.08.03

Surely there's more fun to be had by making it seven minutes.

I have images of Barbelites around the World racing out of their office with their trousers round their ankles scouring the crowds!

12:55 / 28.08.03

It's always like that anyway.

13:00 / 28.08.03

Have you ever tried racing anywhere with your trousers round your ankles?

Tryphena Absent

13:15 / 28.08.03

Does anyone get the feeling Bizunth's leading a crazy, crazy life?

16:18 / 28.08.03

First time I saw this thread was the morning after... I couldn't quite tell if I had just managed a preemptive fuck, or if I would have to get another one in just to be sure. It seems the deadline is tomorrow [notwithstanding these new temporal loop-holes].

Then I realise... I got totally fucked on vodka a few days later. Did we determine if that kind of "fucked" counts?

So... what to do? Seeing as the sneaky poster waited until I had already set off, meaning my click was destined to fall after the fuck. You fucking fucker!

Also... I seem to recall putting most of the effort in myself. Wouldn't this mean that the other party "got fucked", leaving me without a leg-over to stand on?

18:48 / 18.09.03

I remember this one

fart!