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Say Goodbye To That Blood!

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Matthew Fluxington

14:15 / 22.08.03

In a worst-case scenario, would you prefer to:

a) be force-fed a lawnmower

or

b) be exsanguinated (while still alive)

Retribution is coming!

Ariadne

14:20 / 22.08.03

Can I take the lawnmower to bits?

So what happens when you're exsanguinated? Do you just get paler and paler until you finally crumple in on yourself?

Matthew Fluxington

14:21 / 22.08.03

Basically, if you get exsanguinated, you just say goodbye to that blood. And then you pass out, and die.

You don't get the lawnmower in bits. Basically, some crazy bastard makes you eat it all in one go.

Ariadne

14:23 / 22.08.03

The exsanguination sounds much nicer then. You'd just sort of drift off, surely? Mmmmmmmmmmm. Whereas the lawnmower would be quite ouchy in your tummy.

Sax

14:25 / 22.08.03

The lawnmower, definitely. Because it would just be impossible. You might end up with a swollen tongue and a couple of broken teeth, but the crazy bastard would get bored and go off to roll his own faeces into little balls to flick at passers-by before you actually were in danger of eating the thing.

Saveloy

14:41 / 22.08.03

Sax is right, there's no way a lawnmower is going to end up inside your stomach unless it's chopped up first. Hang on - Flux, you're not a cartoon person, are you, by any chance?

Baz Auckland

14:49 / 22.08.03

I'll take #2 if it'll make me undead or something fun like that.

Mazarine

14:53 / 22.08.03

Is the lawnmower on? Like going?

Matthew Fluxington

14:56 / 22.08.03

The lawnmower is definitely on.

8===>Q: alyn

14:58 / 22.08.03

I would rather be exanguinated, it sounds much more peaceful.

How about a weedwacker? What if someone wanted to introduce your face to a weedwacker? Would you rather do that, or run with the Cheetah, or find special shaving razors for Delroy Linndo's head?

Old brown-eye is back

14:59 / 22.08.03

What kind of lawnmower is it? One of those old mechanical numbers, or a hover one or what?

Eloi Tsabaoth

15:02 / 22.08.03

It's got to be a sit-down mower. With Flux at the wheel.

Old brown-eye is back

15:11 / 22.08.03

Is a weedwhacker like a strimmer?

Matthew Fluxington

15:31 / 22.08.03

This kind of lawnmower:

I think that perhaps a better question would be, would you rather "wear a car" or be made to eat a weedwacker?

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

16:53 / 22.08.03

Exsanguinated. Definitely. You'd pass out before it got really bad.

Apart from anything else, the lawnmower is SO likely to have dogshit on its blades. And I ain't eatin' that, not fer no-one!

pomegranate

17:37 / 22.08.03

stoatie is so, so right. i was just about to say that, of all the ways to die, exsanguination sounds like one of the better.
(incidentally, i'm not sure if 'exsanguination' is a word, but now it will surely be the name of some goth/nu-metal type band's new record, w/'NATION' capitalized, and the american flag in the background, dripping w/blood, or something...)

MJ-12

17:43 / 22.08.03

But what if you were exsanguinated with a lawnmower?

8===>Q: alyn

18:53 / 22.08.03

Flux, I really think you should answer your own question here. Would you prefer to be exanguinated or made to eat a lawnmower.

Either way, Say Goodbye To That Blood!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Ethan Hawke

18:56 / 22.08.03

I'M IN THE CAR!

Exsanguinated, definitely.

8===>Q: alyn

19:18 / 22.08.03

GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

I'M NOT SORRY AT ALL!

bio k9

19:43 / 22.08.03

Todd:

You piece of filth! I'm gonna chainsaw your car apart!

Matthew Fluxington

07:11 / 23.08.03

I'd definitely eat the lawnmower. It might really hurt, but it'd make for a funnier obituary.

Qalyn, I'M GOING TO BEAT YOUR ASS IN THE STREET, WHERE EVERYONE CAN SEE IT!

mixmage

08:59 / 23.08.03

"Suck my spinning steel, shithead!"

Braindead

(although the quote is from Bad Taste and refers to a chainsaw

)

Shanghai Quasar

14:44 / 23.08.03

Given that you don't qualify the individual as having to be alive during the process, you can force feed me the lawnmower when I'm dead. I won't mind.

Mourne Kransky

18:56 / 23.08.03

I vote for being exsanguinated by Spike /William the Bloody, whilst simultaneously breaking the bed as we thrash around. I'd be a four course banquet compared to that skinny Buffy after all.

Urrrgh! AARRGH!

Exsanguination's pretty much a gimme. Lawnmowers are hard to control, it would be like a bad, slow decaptiation. Not to mention that lawnmowers frequently stall, and can take a while to restart, yanking on the cord. Sides, at least I could read while being exsanguinated.

Now, would one's blood be being replaced by anything, saline, sterile water? Cause I'm thinking vein collapse might be kinda painful, and an air embolism is a pretty bad way to go. Sterile water, and you'll have cells exploding, saline (with the right mix) might not be so bad at all.

Matthew Fluxington

20:00 / 23.08.03

There is no replacement. You're simply having all of the blood drained from your body, until you are a lifeless husk. This person is really, really mad at you. He's crazy, and he's screaming like an animal. In his mind, this is retribution. And he didn't overreact at all.

MJ-12

02:44 / 24.08.03

HE IS NOT SCREAMING AT ALL! AAAAAAAAH!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

03:47 / 24.08.03

I would eat the lawnmower, in one mighty gulp. No lawnmower can withstand my mutant stomach acids.

Jub

08:11 / 26.08.03

That has to be the most weird arsed question ever!

8===>Q: alyn

14:31 / 26.08.03

You piece of filth. I'm going to get you. Don't think I can't find out where you are.

I'M IN THE CAR!

Matthew Fluxington

14:49 / 26.08.03

You're going to cut down, m'friend.

I'm going to haunt you. I'm going to be on you forever, never letting you rest EVER.

Welcome to Hell, filth!

Well, fuck.

i'm all for exsanguination here...especially after that x-files episode (eve 6) where the two little girls exsanguinated their fathers simulateously on the us east and west coast...i always wondered what they did with all of the blood???

but, yes, exsanguination but only if my blood is collected and used to fill old grolsch bottles (you know, the kind with the neat little stoppers in 'em)!

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